21

[nekolalia]

It's just a number. It's JUST a number. Shame numbers mean so much to me, this one in particular. This number, which represents all the things I dread, which sends me to shivering with fear, which wrenches me out of my fear and throws me into a place of deep melancholy so that I almost wish the fear would return, this number... so powerful in its

Comments

[anonymous]

Oh sweetheart! You don't have to be an adult. I'm nearly 30 and I've never been an adult - certainly never felt like one.

You view your creative pursuits through such a critical eye that you fail to see the magnificence of them. Some of the greatest works are the simplest, because that which speaks to another person does not have to be elaborate, it just needs to hold meaning. Your works always do. So don't tarnish yourself with the taint of failure when you are more than capable of success, you only need to believe it.

And your words are always beautiful and poetic. You still write beautifully, even when the mind is erratic. The future is not bleak, it is filled with potential. Potential is only absent when we stop trying.

Oh, and I am a freak for numbers too. 2 and 1 is 3. 3 is the number of the Goddess and a creative force. It is one of my favourite numbers as it denotes the three main stages of life (for a woman) maiden, mother and crone. Each stage holds it's own wisdom, and by the time you reach the crone stage, you hold the wisdom of both the maiden and the mother within you. Revell in your maidenhood, but do not fear the beauty of the following stages, because maidenhood will always be with you.

Love and blessings on your birthday :) xxxoooxxx

[nekolalia]

Thanks... I wish I wasn't so weak and breakable, I was feeling a lot better today until I got a bit of criticism and now I just want to burn all my work and throw myself off a cliff. I'm simultaneously irate and downtrodden. Ugh... I wish I had that confidence that other people have which lets them ignore the shit that people say because they really believe that what they do is good. What the fuck am I going to do if my art isn't any good? I wonder if people have any idea how important it is to me...

Bah, I'm just rambling... thanks for your input, it makes me feel a whole lot less shitty.