(no subject)
>WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
>
>She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
>Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
>Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
>Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
>And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
>
>WOMEN'S REVENGE
>
>"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished
>to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for
>a television set in her purse. "So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I
>asked.
>"No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
>so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I could do to him."
>
>UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
>
>I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can
>take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by
>the root, and still be afraid of a spider.
>
>
>``````````````````````````````````````````````
>CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
>
>A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales
>girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he
>islooking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the
>correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls
>and a ball of string on the counter. She says, confused, "Sir, I thought
>you were looking for some tampons for your wife? He answers, " You see,
>it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton
>of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling
>papers; cause it's sooooooooooo much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to
>roll my own ............ so does she.
>(Of course . . . I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton :-)
>
>``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
>Subject: wife v/s husband!
>
>A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An
>earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to
>concede their
>position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband
>asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
>"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."
>
>
>A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a
>day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000. The wife replied, "The reason has to be
>because we have to repeat everything to men... The husband then turned to
>his wife and asked, "What?"
>``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
>A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and
>so beautiful all at the same time. " The wife responded, "Allow me to
>explain. God made
>me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would
>be attracted to you!
>````````````````````````
>Husband and wife were in the midst of a violent quarrel, and hubby was
>losing his temper. "Be careful," he said to his wife. "You will bring out
>the beast in me."
>"So what?" his wife shot back. "Who is afraid of a mouse?"
>``````````````````````````
>A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee
>each morning. The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first,
>and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee." The husband
>said, " You are in charge of cooking
>around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just
>wait for my coffee." Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it
>is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee." Husband replies, "I
>can't believe that, show me." So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New
>Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed
>says....
>"HEBREWS "
>
>She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
>Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
>Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
>Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
>And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
>
>WOMEN'S REVENGE
>
>"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished
>to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for
>a television set in her purse. "So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I
>asked.
>"No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
>so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I could do to him."
>
>UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
>
>I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can
>take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by
>the root, and still be afraid of a spider.
>
>
>``````````````````````````````````````````````
>CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
>
>A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales
>girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he
>islooking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the
>correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls
>and a ball of string on the counter. She says, confused, "Sir, I thought
>you were looking for some tampons for your wife? He answers, " You see,
>it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton
>of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling
>papers; cause it's sooooooooooo much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to
>roll my own ............ so does she.
>(Of course . . . I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton :-)
>
>``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
>Subject: wife v/s husband!
>
>A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An
>earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to
>concede their
>position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband
>asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
>"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."
>
>
>A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a
>day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000. The wife replied, "The reason has to be
>because we have to repeat everything to men... The husband then turned to
>his wife and asked, "What?"
>``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
>A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and
>so beautiful all at the same time. " The wife responded, "Allow me to
>explain. God made
>me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would
>be attracted to you!
>````````````````````````
>Husband and wife were in the midst of a violent quarrel, and hubby was
>losing his temper. "Be careful," he said to his wife. "You will bring out
>the beast in me."
>"So what?" his wife shot back. "Who is afraid of a mouse?"
>``````````````````````````
>A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee
>each morning. The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first,
>and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee." The husband
>said, " You are in charge of cooking
>around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just
>wait for my coffee." Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it
>is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee." Husband replies, "I
>can't believe that, show me." So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New
>Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed
>says....
>"HEBREWS "