Ouch.
One of my least favourite feelings happens when you know that someone should have called you by now if you were at all memorable. And you're waiting for them to call... but you know that it's already passed the time that they said they would call. Still, you keep checking your machine and there are no new calls, because, well, maybe they wanted to talk directly to you, and they HAVE been calling, or maybe they've just been really busy, and do actually know how awesome you are. And you feel like "hey, if I spent this much time investing my energy into this thing that I really wanted, I should be able to delude myself a little bit longer! They'll definitely call tomorrow!" but you secretly know that they probably won't ever call you. So I guess what I'm saying is that I should give up now. Knowing that, though, I'm still REALLY hoping for a call tomorrow.
Another of my least favourite feelings happens when you try as hard as you can to do something REALLY ambitious, and then you just look at that thing and go "oh. This isn't that great," but you tell yourself that because you worked so hard, that must mean something awesome is there that you can't see. Except that there isn't.
Crushed is perhaps not the right mood, because I kind of feel like I have always been small and smooshed, but I thought I was normally sized (or gigantic!) and not stuck on some pavement somewhere. My feelings aren't hurt-- just my pride? Sense of self-awesome? Yeah, that thing.
Maybe ultimately all disappointments are the same.
Another of my least favourite feelings happens when you try as hard as you can to do something REALLY ambitious, and then you just look at that thing and go "oh. This isn't that great," but you tell yourself that because you worked so hard, that must mean something awesome is there that you can't see. Except that there isn't.
Crushed is perhaps not the right mood, because I kind of feel like I have always been small and smooshed, but I thought I was normally sized (or gigantic!) and not stuck on some pavement somewhere. My feelings aren't hurt-- just my pride? Sense of self-awesome? Yeah, that thing.
Maybe ultimately all disappointments are the same.