TOPIC 3: "Have you tried losing weight?"
I'm fat. I'm aware that I'm fat, and I don't try to hide it. I don't see it as anything shameful, it's just a fact of my existence.
I'm also disabled, and boy do doctors like to make a backwards association there. You see, I'm fat because I'm disabled. I was actually once so skinny that my doctor pulled my then-spouse aside to discuss whether or not I ate, at all. But then in my mid-twenties, my knees went. The rest of my joints quickly followed suit, and I was a wheelchair-user before I was 30. Suddenly all the activity that had kept me thin just wasn't possible anymore. I still ate well, but the sudden absolute inability to exercise created...well, a fat person.
But doctors ignore that narrative. Even the doctors who watched me first become disabled, then get fat, somehow forgot how things went, and assumed it was the other way around. Now every doctor I see assumes I'm crippled because I'm fat.
It's an interesting assumption, given the disabilities I've been officially diagnosed with. Among other things, I have a genetic disease that affects connective tissue, often resulting in an inability to put any kind of stress on one's joints. Well gee...I guess obesity changes your genes. That's how this works, right?
But I want help, so I try anyway. I go to all the doctors I'm told to go to:
I talk to my PCP about everything that I suffer from. "Have you tried losing weight?"
I talk to the orthopedist about my joint degeneration. "Have you tried losing weight?"
I talk to the rheumatologist about my nerve pain. "Have you tried losing weight?"
I talk to the cardiologist about my heart condition. "Have you tried losing weight?"
I talk to the pain specialist about my arthritis. "Have you tried losing weight?"
Finally I talk to the physical therapist about exercising to lose weight. "Um...you can't do that. Please don't try to do that. Your body cannot handle the exertion necessary to do that."
I eat small meals. Those meals are healthy. I'm a vegetarian. I never drink a drop of alcohol. I don't drink sugary drinks. I don't really snack, except sometimes on nuts. Even my PCP agrees that my diet is ideal. So exactly how am I supposed to lose weight? All those fat-shaming doctors haven't been able to provide me with an answer. And it's not that I don't ask, oh I ask. But they usually just shrug and tell me to find a way.
Cause permanent physical damage by exercising beyond my ability? Sounds fine. Risk weakness and more syncope by starving myself? Yeah that's okay. But just stay fat and still expect decent medical care? That's ridiculous.
Because doctors have exactly one solution to throw at people like me, and they don't seem to particularly care if it's a dangerous one. Every fat person has the same problem: Fatness. And we'd better fix it, or die trying.
I'm also disabled, and boy do doctors like to make a backwards association there. You see, I'm fat because I'm disabled. I was actually once so skinny that my doctor pulled my then-spouse aside to discuss whether or not I ate, at all. But then in my mid-twenties, my knees went. The rest of my joints quickly followed suit, and I was a wheelchair-user before I was 30. Suddenly all the activity that had kept me thin just wasn't possible anymore. I still ate well, but the sudden absolute inability to exercise created...well, a fat person.
But doctors ignore that narrative. Even the doctors who watched me first become disabled, then get fat, somehow forgot how things went, and assumed it was the other way around. Now every doctor I see assumes I'm crippled because I'm fat.
It's an interesting assumption, given the disabilities I've been officially diagnosed with. Among other things, I have a genetic disease that affects connective tissue, often resulting in an inability to put any kind of stress on one's joints. Well gee...I guess obesity changes your genes. That's how this works, right?
But I want help, so I try anyway. I go to all the doctors I'm told to go to:
I talk to my PCP about everything that I suffer from. "Have you tried losing weight?"
I talk to the orthopedist about my joint degeneration. "Have you tried losing weight?"
I talk to the rheumatologist about my nerve pain. "Have you tried losing weight?"
I talk to the cardiologist about my heart condition. "Have you tried losing weight?"
I talk to the pain specialist about my arthritis. "Have you tried losing weight?"
Finally I talk to the physical therapist about exercising to lose weight. "Um...you can't do that. Please don't try to do that. Your body cannot handle the exertion necessary to do that."
I eat small meals. Those meals are healthy. I'm a vegetarian. I never drink a drop of alcohol. I don't drink sugary drinks. I don't really snack, except sometimes on nuts. Even my PCP agrees that my diet is ideal. So exactly how am I supposed to lose weight? All those fat-shaming doctors haven't been able to provide me with an answer. And it's not that I don't ask, oh I ask. But they usually just shrug and tell me to find a way.
Cause permanent physical damage by exercising beyond my ability? Sounds fine. Risk weakness and more syncope by starving myself? Yeah that's okay. But just stay fat and still expect decent medical care? That's ridiculous.
Because doctors have exactly one solution to throw at people like me, and they don't seem to particularly care if it's a dangerous one. Every fat person has the same problem: Fatness. And we'd better fix it, or die trying.