(no subject)

[neefagirl]

I'm turning into a fat disgusting pig and I need to lose weight....ten pounds at least....I could really afford to lose fifteen tho...I don't think it will be that hard once I start to exercise and eat right tho, because it's just extra weight that I've picked up from doin basically nothing and working at damn dairy queen...after tonight I promised myself no more dairy queen food or any other fast food and I'm only allowed to have a kids sized dish of ice cream when I work...that's not that bad cuz the ice cream is reduced fat and kids sized is like half of a small. But I told Josh that I wanted/needed his support and he said cool we'll go to the gym together and eat right and he said he's happy for me for realizing I want to change something and setting my mind to it. By spring break, which is like late march-early aprilish, I want my "new" body...haha. I'm just way too big. ugh you know it's bad when it's turned from just "ugh...I wish I could lose a couple lbs" to "omg...I'm disgusting....I need to stop this now before it gets out of control." That's where I'm at. Plus I'm short ya kno...so I'll look fat even if I'm not really....that's my number one new years resolution!

Work was hell tonight. It was just me and Darrin(the store manager) he's 20 tho so he doesn't really give a crap. He was high off his ass, and couldn't do anything so I was flyin around the store doin everything.....it was crazy. I need more money. I'm so broke it's not even funny, and I'm in debt with my mom after spending way too much money on christmas gifts.

I have my first visit with my psychologist/therapist whatever you wanna call it sometime this week....I'm kinda scared about that, but I'll get through it.

I'm out. cya