Regression
Every so often (usually around finals/midterms time), I find myself in the same old bind. In brief: too much shit to do, and not enough time to do it. And so I curse myself and, halfheartedly, throw myself into the work and somehow, by the skin of my teeth, am able to get all my work in just at the deadline. Then I stand up, aching from bruises, brush the dirt off my knees, and make that most unkept of promises: Never Again.
Yup. It's that time again.
I'm taking only four classes this semester, because Chinese languages count as two. Since posting on LJ has been impossible for a month, and even now it's pretty annoying, I haven't really complained much about Chinese; and, for the most part, it's been, at worst, a minor aggravation. And I don't expect that assessment to change in the next four days. Chinese Arts and Culture has been engrossing, Modern Chinese History has been enlightening, Rural Economics has been death, but none of them really asked for that much during most of the year.
Needless to say, this is no longer the case: All three of them have final papers, eight-to-ten pages each. One due Thursday, and two due... well, technically at the end of the month, but since we're traveling across China over the next two weeks, they're effectively due on Friday or Saturday. Adding insult to injury is that these have not been work-heavy classes. I honestly don't know what else Rural Economics is grading on, besides a paper which I cannot find a topic for.
God, I can't stand that class. Probably the dullest thing I've sat through in six semesters.
Now, this (in general) is a familiar state of affairs. However, the fact is that it is worse, for two reasons, because I'm in China. First of all, if I never mentioned it, the dorm set-up here is horrid. The "desk" I've created for myself is essentially a bedside table and an armchair, not something which really feels academic. Furthermore, there is always some distraction to my already feeble work ethic; while this is true back at American, the fact is compounded by the knowledge that in a sense I came here for the distractions, not the academics.
So it's understandable, but it isn't progress. Every semester I promise this, this time I'm going to be different. And every time I fool myself up until the moment reality hits.
But this time? This time I really mean it.
OK. Now back to the paper.