Okay, Deep post! Not ready for it then don't read it! The topic is me and money!
I am unhappy and I am not afraid to tell anyone that I am. I have been filling a void and that void is unhappiness. I feel that money doesn't matter to me anymore. I am to the point that I am tired of buying expensive purses,shoes,and clothes. I realize that the poor are the happiest people on earth in some cases. I can't lie, I have everything that I want and more but it doesn't seem to fill what I need. In fact, that is my problem I get everything I want. And I know what you are probably thinking, "she is full of shit". But this is really how I feel. I am a person that has never really had a REAL job. Never paid for my own gas. In fact, I have never bought anything big for myself. Money is not happiness. I don't care what people say that they could find happiness with it. THEY ARE ALL LIARS!! As I sit here and think about how boring and depressing that my life is, it makes me mad and sad. I have tried to buy love in the past but that only led to heartbreak. Maybe I have been given too much in life. I appreciate all that my parents do for me but I see that other people have more fun having not a damn dime. A person recently told me that I have never had to wish or dream for anything that I just got it. This makes me feel like I am a spoiled brat. I hate when people call me spoiled. But sometimes, I have to think maybe they are being truthful. I bet you if any of you are one of those that is always broke you have more fun in life and enjoy it. Money is just something that causes confusion. I am so open-hearted that I give people money that need it. I am not greedy. I hope to have somewhat respect from those that I give to but only to be played as a fool. I am tired of giving to people that don't love me and accept me but only use me. Someone just told me the other day that I was a poor little rich girl that can't find happiness when she gets everything. I am not rich, and I take offense to people saying that to me. The rich normally have more problems in life even though they have money. I see why celebrities and fame people can't find happiness when they have millions or billions. I am nowhere near neither but I feel every bit of what they feel. I have tired to find jobs at places but get laughed at by my parents and friends that say why work when you don't have to. Maybe I want to actually get things on my own and show that I am independent. My parents don't like the idea of me getting a job because they say that they pay for everything I want so why would I want more. So, basically, I will no longer rely on shopping sprees to make me happy. Starting tomorrow, my life of depression will no longer take over my mind. I know that I can't live without money because I have to provide my essential needs in life but that doesn't mean that I should just blow it on stupid shit. Okay, I am done speaking of money.