a few hours short of a day

[necrofiend]

it's almost three a.m. and I should be way asleep by now. my sleep pattern has been off for a long time now. I can't ever sleep enough, even if I get a ton of sleep. I'm tired. for a while I thought it was just not getting enough sleep, or something else that I was or was not doing that was making me so tired. lately, I'm not so sure that's it. I'm starting to feel that it's a different type of absence. one day recently was the first time in a very long time that I felt completely immersed in the day and refreshed....and for a change, happy.

...I'm too tired to finish the thoughts, they'll be added later at some point.