This is a test of my patience. Not an interesting entry.
Sometimes I really can't help, but stare at the walls and daydream about the future. Trying to escape, really, which I DON'T find in my dreams. Gawd, they are so tormented. I'm tired of dreaming. Maybe, if I were superstitious, I would realize how much they are making me appreciate my life more, no matter its disarray. For the first couple days of isolation, I wanted to do every little thing that distracted me from my worries, but the major problems have been solved and suddenly I'm not as motivated. Regrettably, depressed. I think it's silly and I hardly acknowledge it, but I know it's why I don't feel like getting out of bed. There's not a whole lot of reason to.
I have 2 full closets now. That's exciting. My clothes were previously bagged and before that, stored in the basement.
I wrote about 9 pages of my autobiography. It was an impulse so now that I've stopped writing, I, of course, don't know from where to continue. I know for sure that I need to move quickly into the middle school section, because the childhood stuff is too depressing. I gotta admit, I was noticeably more light-hearted after I wrote it out, though. That's why I write.
The insight guy came to fix my phone yesterday. Now I have a link to the outside world. My car was almost on empty, too, so I couldn't go anywhere I couldn't walk to, but yesterday, Dan forced $5 on me so I could come to his house. Now I could go somewhere if I really wanted to. Jordan has Vonage now so he can call me anytime and we can talk for as long as we want.
He is coming here Friday and we may try to catch the Le Petomane theater at the Rud if it's cheap enough. Then, he's going to take me back to live with him for the next week. About this, I am unbearably ecstatic.
Food had been an issue, as well, these past few days. One night, I was going particularly stir crazy from having nothing to do, noone to talk to. I looked out the window ever hour for Jason to come home and when he finally did, I raced right over. I, of course, had been longing to talk to Jordan all day, but thought it impossible, considering the circumstances, but as soon as I came into Jason's, he practically handed me their cell phone and was like, here, call Jordan. More to the point here, though, they donated to me 2 pb&j sandwiches, one of which I ate on the spot, and a bowl of instant soup. Then, last night I looked inside this grocery bag that had been lying in the living room floor for weeks. I thought it was Hallie's this whole time, but it was actually food I had brought back from my mom's, plus some shampoo. Now I have pasta, soup, and lentils to eat!
Tonight, I'm going to hook my computer up in my room and see if it will play dvd's. I know it plays music, so that's somethin', I suppose.
That's all I got, I guess. Back to my cage.
I have 2 full closets now. That's exciting. My clothes were previously bagged and before that, stored in the basement.
I wrote about 9 pages of my autobiography. It was an impulse so now that I've stopped writing, I, of course, don't know from where to continue. I know for sure that I need to move quickly into the middle school section, because the childhood stuff is too depressing. I gotta admit, I was noticeably more light-hearted after I wrote it out, though. That's why I write.
The insight guy came to fix my phone yesterday. Now I have a link to the outside world. My car was almost on empty, too, so I couldn't go anywhere I couldn't walk to, but yesterday, Dan forced $5 on me so I could come to his house. Now I could go somewhere if I really wanted to. Jordan has Vonage now so he can call me anytime and we can talk for as long as we want.
He is coming here Friday and we may try to catch the Le Petomane theater at the Rud if it's cheap enough. Then, he's going to take me back to live with him for the next week. About this, I am unbearably ecstatic.
Food had been an issue, as well, these past few days. One night, I was going particularly stir crazy from having nothing to do, noone to talk to. I looked out the window ever hour for Jason to come home and when he finally did, I raced right over. I, of course, had been longing to talk to Jordan all day, but thought it impossible, considering the circumstances, but as soon as I came into Jason's, he practically handed me their cell phone and was like, here, call Jordan. More to the point here, though, they donated to me 2 pb&j sandwiches, one of which I ate on the spot, and a bowl of instant soup. Then, last night I looked inside this grocery bag that had been lying in the living room floor for weeks. I thought it was Hallie's this whole time, but it was actually food I had brought back from my mom's, plus some shampoo. Now I have pasta, soup, and lentils to eat!
Tonight, I'm going to hook my computer up in my room and see if it will play dvd's. I know it plays music, so that's somethin', I suppose.
That's all I got, I guess. Back to my cage.