"you said you'd always be there for me, but you're not because of me"
wow. i'm the biggest asshole in the universe sometimes. i can't sleep, i've been staying awake all night like 3 or 4 times a week and then if i fall asleep its at like 6am. this is usually pretty rare for me...its hell of lame, i fuckin hate it. tomorrow i'm off to pine crest, that is gonna be fuckin awesome, i think. i've never been there but i've heard its hella tight. i walk so much more nowadays. like walking into CV from kens house or to vallelys or just around trying to not think about stuff but accidently not having anything else. i haven't wanted to do anything or hang out or stay home or i'll be kickin it and then just want to leave hella randomly. been going home early and staying up late just being all twaked out in my room. my birthday is on tuesday, i think tuesday. i'm not excited, its hard to be. i can't even get myself psyched up for pine crest. i haven't even left and i'm already thinking more about coming home and taking a shower and climbing into bed, hopefully exhausted and able to sleep. i really miss zach and i'll miss him even more at pine crest, at least here even if i can't see him, he's right up the street and thats comforting. one thing i am looking forward to is my dinosaur sweatshirt that vicki is making me!! its pink and has blue and and green shiny... i dunno things on the hood and shiny blue sequins. its hekka cool. the monster one she made for matt is fucking savage. it has fur lining the hood and claws and a mask... so cool.
dear cameron, remember the Tao Te Ching book that you got me? (i think u have it too..?) well, its awesome. thanks for getting it for me. closest thing to magic words ever. hope you had the time of your life in costa rica.
love, rhi
dear cameron, remember the Tao Te Ching book that you got me? (i think u have it too..?) well, its awesome. thanks for getting it for me. closest thing to magic words ever. hope you had the time of your life in costa rica.
love, rhi