Here's the situation.
I saw a therapist yesterday. I explained my dream and what made me so upset about it. I also explained the people involved, and why this was such a big deal to me. I also confessed my suicidal thoughts. I don't want to kill myself, I just don't want to keep on feeling the way I do, not really able to change anything. I still can't bring myself to talk about that god damn dream without bursting into tears. I'll just say it feels like my best friend raped my mother, and showed me a video of it. Not only that, but all parties expected me to be ok with it. I want to kill someone or something. That's why I saw the therapist, before I did anything stupid. Something needs to change. I can't keep avoiding the people I hate, even though I see them every week. I have to confront them. It will end several friendships, so I'll probably be drunk when I do it. Life sucks.