warning: super long post about paint colors...
I have officially decided that I am going to paint my room! I'm excited because I need a change AND its so risky. I don't remember what the lease says and I can't find it, but I am assuming I am not allowed to do such things...at least not without talking to my landlord about it, to which I am sure they'd refuse to let me anyway. I basically don't
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when I wasnt on medication..my depression and mood swings got worse over the years.
I dont have like depression where Im depressed everyday. That would suck. I rather have unpredictable mood swings than depressed everyday or the majority of the time.
It comes and goes which was really annoying. My moods could switch in a day, every few hours or every few days or weeks. I didnt know when the next mood swing would come. I could wake up in a good mood and then out of the blue angry and depressed . It would suck because if I had something planned during the day it would ruin it or I wouldnt have the energy to go to work but I forced myself (it was hard) to go and put on a fake smile.
The worst time was this one day last winter where I woke up depressed and felt so fatigued I could barely move. Odd feeling. I had to call off work that day which I rarely ever call off work.
It was like being on a roller coaster lol. It got to the point I couldnt predict when my mood would change. I had more suicidal thoughts than before. Never plan on acting on it but I guess that was just a symptom of my depression.
Sometimes it would be triggered by stress or life events but then there were times it would come out of nowhere. Mood swings were worse during the winter.
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You nailed it. So many people are misdiagnosed with bipolar and its so damn annoying when someone is like,"OMgz I was happy and now Im sad. Im so bipolar."
Its like bitch pls lol. Ive seen people with bipolar. Bipolar is more than just being sad one day and happy. Its being over happy and sad and theres a bunch of symptoms and criteria for someone to be diagnosed. Manic --Depression. Different types of bipolar disorder also. It usually takes awhile for someone to be diagnosed anyway because people who seek help usually just come to therapy when they are depressed. They dont talk about the manic episodes so some therapists just diagnose them with major depression disorder.
It could have been the medication you took. Sometimes it takes trial and error to find the right one.
But if you can handle it without medication power to you. :)
Taking an antidepressant does not mean a person wont ever be depressed. I lol at people who think that. In all honestly I sometimes get depressed but its more rare and if I do feel depressed its not even as intense as before and it does not last. I also have less mood swings.
I rarely get depressed. The majority of the month its pretty much stable which is way less annoying.
I do now that even if I take meds I still have to eliminate triggers ie not getting enough sleep, not eating right, alcohol.
Alcohol really fucks me over also. I can see why they say to not drink while you are on antidepressants considering alcohol is a depressant. It made me have an episode last month and I ended up back to where I started until a few days later and felt very depressed . worse than before I took meds. I was thinking my medication wasnt working anymore but it was the alcohol that triggered it.
The exercising to an extent did help. I got so lazy this year which could explain possibly why I had more mood swings however like you said vitamins and exercising does not always work. Shit if Im depressed I dont even feel like exercising. I dont feel like doing anything.
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I can understand why you dont want to be on meds considering you took many different brands. It has to be exhausting.
Do what you think is right. I will however tell you if you continue to feel depressed even trying different methods your depression most likely will get worse. I know it did for me.
lol this is so long
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