Fic: The silent world of Charlie Matheson
The silent world of Charlie Matheson, Charlie + Monroe Militia, AU, PG, (465 words) || Prompt: Words.
After Ben's death, Rachel makes a confession to Monroe and Charlie deals with the consequences.
Author's notes: I started with Charlie and Monroe and just never got anywhere else. Oh and Jeremy crept in somehow. I don't really know how to write things anymore...so I blame that.
- - -
Her first week in residence she’s shut away like a dirty secret, in a room closer to the sky than she’s ever been, two guards on her locked door, thick bars on her window, in case she gets any funny ideas.
Jeremy visits her, during her lockdown, with books and questions, and once even appears with a box of chocolates under his arm that he places on the bed between them and eats greedily enough that she has to disguise her laugh as a cough.
- - -
When she's finally granted her limited freedom, she's given a tour of the house.
The basement left for last.
It's Tom who takes her down there, once or twice.
“Field trip,” he says the first time, sweeping her out of the room and away from Jeremy’s lessons. She doesn’t miss the tightening of Jeremy’s lips as she glances back.
It’s butchery what they do down there, and there’s a sharp smell of meat and blood and sweat that clings to her clothes even after she’s returned to the sunlight rooms above.
- - -
Monroe's not a monster up close; his eyes are a reasonable distance from each other, blue and intelligent, his hands are warm and companionable, and sometimes - though she can scarcely believe it - his smile even reaches his eyes, crinkling fine lines along his skin.
She's standing at his side when he finally turns the lights on in Philly.
- - -
When the paternity test comes back, she leans forward, pressing her face into Jeremy's chest, needing to hide suddenly and he’s the closest thing. His fingers comb through her hair, smoothing it down, as he uses an arm to pull her closer against him.
If she stays very still she can pretend it’s someone else holding her.
- - -
Monroe's careful what he says around her after that.
As if a blood test and a piece of paper have conclusively determined that she’s a vulnerability in his anxiously ruled kingdom. His eyes settle on her more wistfully now, his mouth almost smiling, before he looks away to whoever’s trying to get his attention (there’s always someone waiting). She quickly learns that he shuts himself away in his office most of the day and starts arriving there, whenever she can find a moment to escape Jeremy, or Jason, her watchful shadows.
He never sends her away.
His eyes staying stuck on her for as long as it takes for her to pull a book off the bookcase and settle onto the couch by the window.
She never says anything to him.
The words she should say, and the words she doesn’t want to say are one and the same, so she holds them in. Though, she's afraid he can read them in her eyes.
That he sees that bit by bit, she's forgiving him.
_______________________________
Oh and: Feel free to make it up for yourself, but in my head Charlie does talk...just very rarely and mostly to Jeremy. Because Jeremy could wear anyone down.
And oh god. It's only when I'm writing that I remember how much I don't like writing. Coz nothing ends up how it should be. Ever. The version in my head's better, if only I could show you that.
After Ben's death, Rachel makes a confession to Monroe and Charlie deals with the consequences.
Author's notes: I started with Charlie and Monroe and just never got anywhere else. Oh and Jeremy crept in somehow. I don't really know how to write things anymore...so I blame that.
- - -
Her first week in residence she’s shut away like a dirty secret, in a room closer to the sky than she’s ever been, two guards on her locked door, thick bars on her window, in case she gets any funny ideas.
Jeremy visits her, during her lockdown, with books and questions, and once even appears with a box of chocolates under his arm that he places on the bed between them and eats greedily enough that she has to disguise her laugh as a cough.
- - -
When she's finally granted her limited freedom, she's given a tour of the house.
The basement left for last.
It's Tom who takes her down there, once or twice.
“Field trip,” he says the first time, sweeping her out of the room and away from Jeremy’s lessons. She doesn’t miss the tightening of Jeremy’s lips as she glances back.
It’s butchery what they do down there, and there’s a sharp smell of meat and blood and sweat that clings to her clothes even after she’s returned to the sunlight rooms above.
- - -
Monroe's not a monster up close; his eyes are a reasonable distance from each other, blue and intelligent, his hands are warm and companionable, and sometimes - though she can scarcely believe it - his smile even reaches his eyes, crinkling fine lines along his skin.
She's standing at his side when he finally turns the lights on in Philly.
- - -
When the paternity test comes back, she leans forward, pressing her face into Jeremy's chest, needing to hide suddenly and he’s the closest thing. His fingers comb through her hair, smoothing it down, as he uses an arm to pull her closer against him.
If she stays very still she can pretend it’s someone else holding her.
- - -
Monroe's careful what he says around her after that.
As if a blood test and a piece of paper have conclusively determined that she’s a vulnerability in his anxiously ruled kingdom. His eyes settle on her more wistfully now, his mouth almost smiling, before he looks away to whoever’s trying to get his attention (there’s always someone waiting). She quickly learns that he shuts himself away in his office most of the day and starts arriving there, whenever she can find a moment to escape Jeremy, or Jason, her watchful shadows.
He never sends her away.
His eyes staying stuck on her for as long as it takes for her to pull a book off the bookcase and settle onto the couch by the window.
She never says anything to him.
The words she should say, and the words she doesn’t want to say are one and the same, so she holds them in. Though, she's afraid he can read them in her eyes.
That he sees that bit by bit, she's forgiving him.
_______________________________
Oh and: Feel free to make it up for yourself, but in my head Charlie does talk...just very rarely and mostly to Jeremy. Because Jeremy could wear anyone down.
And oh god. It's only when I'm writing that I remember how much I don't like writing. Coz nothing ends up how it should be. Ever. The version in my head's better, if only I could show you that.