(no subject)
sundays are for bike rides and baking and friends. movie marathons with a gargantuan amount of food are also good. but most of all, to me, sundays mean phone calls. late night drives. sleepy conversation.
sundays also make me sad. i don't know why. the thought of school starting did induce that habitual terrified feeling. i got so anxious, upset, antsy. all i wanted was to hear his voice.
and then he called.
and he said: that's kind of a weird questions.
and i said: i know. but still.
and he said: i don't know.
and i said:
and he said:
and i said: okay.
and he said: it's not like that.
then what is it like?
i mean, well for one thing you're like...a really, really close friend.
right...
well, yeah... and for another, it goes deeper. i love that you're you.
for some reason it was the only thing that could have made me feel better. so of course i started to cry and of course he laughed warmly and of course i laughed and of course we're okay.
school started and i'm still unsure as to how i feel about it. i'm excited, like more excited than i have been in a long time. i'm also overwhelmed and scared and a little annoyed by the fact that studying actually seems to be in order this semester. we'll see how it goes.
in the atrium, that weird little intersection in the library, proved to be one of the hairier things to happen to me today. by which i mean that it acted as the vehicle for completely awkward moments that felt out of my control. when different components of your lives meet up in one sunny glass pyramid, you tend to think about things. so that's how it was, a convergence of people and conflicting emotions and a lot of brand new facial hair.
moral of the day:
moustaches = not cute, when worn by sad reminders of things that could have been.
sundays also make me sad. i don't know why. the thought of school starting did induce that habitual terrified feeling. i got so anxious, upset, antsy. all i wanted was to hear his voice.
and then he called.
and he said: that's kind of a weird questions.
and i said: i know. but still.
and he said: i don't know.
and i said:
and he said:
and i said: okay.
and he said: it's not like that.
then what is it like?
i mean, well for one thing you're like...a really, really close friend.
right...
well, yeah... and for another, it goes deeper. i love that you're you.
for some reason it was the only thing that could have made me feel better. so of course i started to cry and of course he laughed warmly and of course i laughed and of course we're okay.
school started and i'm still unsure as to how i feel about it. i'm excited, like more excited than i have been in a long time. i'm also overwhelmed and scared and a little annoyed by the fact that studying actually seems to be in order this semester. we'll see how it goes.
in the atrium, that weird little intersection in the library, proved to be one of the hairier things to happen to me today. by which i mean that it acted as the vehicle for completely awkward moments that felt out of my control. when different components of your lives meet up in one sunny glass pyramid, you tend to think about things. so that's how it was, a convergence of people and conflicting emotions and a lot of brand new facial hair.
moral of the day:
moustaches = not cute, when worn by sad reminders of things that could have been.