I love fishes cuz they're so delicious
School starts back up on monday. I cant decide if I care or not. Almost fully moved into the new place. I think that fun times will be had there. First big party of the year this saturday. Looking forward to meeting the first years. I will surely impress them with my sagacious advice and penetrating wisdom. I have decided that ramen noodles should be made more expensive to prevent people from buying 6 tons at a time and proceeding to stare at the aftermath within the pantry. I have also decided that factory speakers for any computer suck more than any sci-fi reference that you wish to insert here. They produce sharp, distorted noises and deserve a swift death via tire iron. On a more positive note, i am completely floored by the comedic genius of dane cook. Listen to his new cd retaliation or suffer the consequences. I think I would quite enjoy doing what he does and seeing him live was great. Paying bills is a total suckfest. I wish i could charge hundred dollar deposits for everything i do like the power company.
"hey navid, can you pass the salt"..
"sure, just give me a hundred dollar deposit first"..
"why?"..
"because you are a hypothetical character in this confusing point that i am trying to prove"..
"this isnt really working. i think you're underestimating the intelligence of the reader by trying to explore a topic that is self explanatory and ultimately irrelevant."..
"your mom"..
...
Also, they just cloned a dog. I'm frightened. What's next? Sheep? Some scientists refer to sheep as the missing evolutionary link. Those scientists are infact heroin junkies that reside in a small alley behind the wal-mart a few blocks from my place. Their attempts to remain vertical are comical at best and resemble a round of drunken tai-chi. How fun. I just read an article (which used the phrase "as described in a recent harvard study" which is codeword for "immortally inscribed in all the Holy Books of Heaven") describing crystal meth as being the largest drug problem in this country right now. There's really nothing funny about that. Except that author's name was Richard Shoon. Which means the article was written be "a - dick - shoon" and the word addiction is ironic in this case. Also, i made all that up. So, in the immortal words of dane cook, "suck my back".
"hey navid, can you pass the salt"..
"sure, just give me a hundred dollar deposit first"..
"why?"..
"because you are a hypothetical character in this confusing point that i am trying to prove"..
"this isnt really working. i think you're underestimating the intelligence of the reader by trying to explore a topic that is self explanatory and ultimately irrelevant."..
"your mom"..
...
Also, they just cloned a dog. I'm frightened. What's next? Sheep? Some scientists refer to sheep as the missing evolutionary link. Those scientists are infact heroin junkies that reside in a small alley behind the wal-mart a few blocks from my place. Their attempts to remain vertical are comical at best and resemble a round of drunken tai-chi. How fun. I just read an article (which used the phrase "as described in a recent harvard study" which is codeword for "immortally inscribed in all the Holy Books of Heaven") describing crystal meth as being the largest drug problem in this country right now. There's really nothing funny about that. Except that author's name was Richard Shoon. Which means the article was written be "a - dick - shoon" and the word addiction is ironic in this case. Also, i made all that up. So, in the immortal words of dane cook, "suck my back".