Dating

[nausved]

I really dislike dates. I like hanging out with people, and I like having excuses to see things and do things. I just dislike the wishy-washiness of it all. Sometimes dates feel like a job interview, except that it isn't clear who's interviewing whom or what, precisely, the position is. The process is like a strange, stilted, improvised dance where

Comments

[csn]

he heh, yep!

Are you single again?

[nausved]

Yes, as of April-ish.

[csn]

I've been in a relationship for three months now. It's been pretty good, but I have this thought I keep coming back to: I realize, every relationship I've been in, I feel ambiguous about to some degree, which leads me to wondering if that's just the nature of relationships. What do you think?

[nausved]

That has always been my experience. I suspect it's normal...? Or at least normal for a young relationship, where there are still a lot of uncertainties. Or maybe it's just normal for certain sorts of people; I know I have a tendency to be doubtful in nearly all aspects of my life, especially those aspects that are rather variable or new.

[csn]

Yeah, normal for freaks like us.. :P

At least for me, I think a) I am used to operating as a very independent person much of the time, so even when my my mind tells me I want or need it, it is a fine balance between being enjoyable and stifling, and b) I am so unusual, it is really rare to meet someone I really click with, and when people ask me if I've been in love I have to say either "I don't know" or 'I don't think so," such that when single, I am in the position of being angsty about this and when in a relationship, have the tendency of wondering if it is really right that I am with this person.