I don't know where I go but I know I drive alone.
I've been listening to this song on repeat for a little while now. Nicole brought me home a little while ago. I don't know what stage I'm at in my breakup. I feel like shit. That's what I feel like. I don't understand what about me is unlovable. It's been so long. And everytime someone asked me why I was with him I said it was because I loved him. And I felt he loved me. I let him get away with murder because I thought somewhere in him that he loved me. But I guess everyone was right. You just don't do that to someone you love. Why couldn't I see or feel that he didn't love me? I don't get it. I don't know how to make myself get it. I'm a strong person but there are just some things that will never make sense to me.
Stupidity makes a person end up where I ended up. It feels like a huge setback. He wasted my time. He wasted my time and I let him. It was stupid. It was weak. Love... I loved him. I loved someone who was wasting my time and my emotions. Someone who was with me because he didn't want to be alone. Someone who was with me because financially I supported him. Someone who was with me because I was good in bed. And I was stupid. I was always so afraid of being used for sex. So petrified but I let it happen anyway. So what now? I'm free? Free from what? Free to look at all the stupid things I let myself do for love . Oh yeah... Nitta smart. Everyone else saw it, why didn't I? Everyone else saw how awful he was why didn't I? Why did I let him make me feel like a bitch for all the awful things he did? How can I ever trust anyone again? I don't even want to sum up my relationships because they all sucked. Maybe it's me. I didn't want to go through this stage. I hate this stage. I hate it. I finally freed myself but at what cost? I set myself free and now I'm all alone. There's no one here now. Good job Jannitta. Now everyone is gone.
Can't move on... but I can't go home
and I'm not so strong... but I'll make my way
to the place I know
inside my heart
where I used to go to get brave
and I don't want to be lost anymore.
gotta find my way back home.
I don't know where I g0 - but I know I drive alone.
I terribly miss you....
more than you'll ever know.
You've got to come back somehow.
You've got to come back somehow.
Can't move on... but I can't go home
and I'm not so strong... but I'll make my way
to the place I know
inside my heart
where I used to go
to get brave and....
Stupidity makes a person end up where I ended up. It feels like a huge setback. He wasted my time. He wasted my time and I let him. It was stupid. It was weak. Love... I loved him. I loved someone who was wasting my time and my emotions. Someone who was with me because he didn't want to be alone. Someone who was with me because financially I supported him. Someone who was with me because I was good in bed. And I was stupid. I was always so afraid of being used for sex. So petrified but I let it happen anyway. So what now? I'm free? Free from what? Free to look at all the stupid things I let myself do for love . Oh yeah... Nitta smart. Everyone else saw it, why didn't I? Everyone else saw how awful he was why didn't I? Why did I let him make me feel like a bitch for all the awful things he did? How can I ever trust anyone again? I don't even want to sum up my relationships because they all sucked. Maybe it's me. I didn't want to go through this stage. I hate this stage. I hate it. I finally freed myself but at what cost? I set myself free and now I'm all alone. There's no one here now. Good job Jannitta. Now everyone is gone.
Can't move on... but I can't go home
and I'm not so strong... but I'll make my way
to the place I know
inside my heart
where I used to go to get brave
and I don't want to be lost anymore.
gotta find my way back home.
I don't know where I g0 - but I know I drive alone.
I terribly miss you....
more than you'll ever know.
You've got to come back somehow.
You've got to come back somehow.
Can't move on... but I can't go home
and I'm not so strong... but I'll make my way
to the place I know
inside my heart
where I used to go
to get brave and....