(no subject)
OMG when was the last time I posted here?
I miss the days when LJ was such a big community; people would send you friend requests or at least you'd get anonymous comments. Now this place is deserted, I don't get updates of fics I used to read so avidly…
I miss the good old days.
I first came here because of someone I cared for and we had such a great time while it lasted! Now things are different and I'm all alone talking to myself. But ultimately that was the original purpose of it all, right? Even if it was cool to share your entries for others to read and comment on, my good old journal is the only witness to all my miseries and happy times.
It's been months since my last entry but there are not so many changes in my life.
Still no luck on the relationships field. No friends around although I have lots of acquaintances. Yes I spend good times with them but I miss having a deep heart-to-heart with a friend. It feels lonely.
I never had a problem with loneliness before but i wish I could have talked to someone about my health. It's such a burden on my shoulders...
My surgeon, and now permanent gynecologist, is so excited about going to Japan next September for the RWC2019 and at first I was too but now our rugby team sucks so terribly (they have a mental problem since they are talented as fuck) that I'm having second thoughts about going to Tokio for a 3rd time. We'll see. Plus, US currency going up like there's no tomorrow... I'm not so sure anymore.
My sex life has been ok, but I'm trying to come to terms with the fact that things will never go back to the way they once were. It's funny how it downed on me that it was such an important part of my life. Now that I'm not so interested anymore I feel lost. It was a way in which I used to communicate with people, and now it's all gone. One definitely cannot change a process that was learnt at 15 and which changed drastically at 43 overnight.
Things at work have also been ok. My relationship with the area manager has improved a lot to the point the other day he told me while we were working on some papers (and while I was filling in for my direct boss who was absent) that my current position is now small for my abilities and that he's trying to set up a sort of "elite group of collaborators" where he plans to include me but still didn't have the go-ahead from our Director. In the meantime, It's funny to see he sends all work-related e-mails to me and just CCes my direct boss.
Now he wp's me frequently, at odd hours, and it's impossible not to think of my old boss, THE one… They are SO similar in so many ways!
I'm falling asleep. Will post part 2 soon.
I miss the days when LJ was such a big community; people would send you friend requests or at least you'd get anonymous comments. Now this place is deserted, I don't get updates of fics I used to read so avidly…
I miss the good old days.
I first came here because of someone I cared for and we had such a great time while it lasted! Now things are different and I'm all alone talking to myself. But ultimately that was the original purpose of it all, right? Even if it was cool to share your entries for others to read and comment on, my good old journal is the only witness to all my miseries and happy times.
It's been months since my last entry but there are not so many changes in my life.
Still no luck on the relationships field. No friends around although I have lots of acquaintances. Yes I spend good times with them but I miss having a deep heart-to-heart with a friend. It feels lonely.
I never had a problem with loneliness before but i wish I could have talked to someone about my health. It's such a burden on my shoulders...
My surgeon, and now permanent gynecologist, is so excited about going to Japan next September for the RWC2019 and at first I was too but now our rugby team sucks so terribly (they have a mental problem since they are talented as fuck) that I'm having second thoughts about going to Tokio for a 3rd time. We'll see. Plus, US currency going up like there's no tomorrow... I'm not so sure anymore.
My sex life has been ok, but I'm trying to come to terms with the fact that things will never go back to the way they once were. It's funny how it downed on me that it was such an important part of my life. Now that I'm not so interested anymore I feel lost. It was a way in which I used to communicate with people, and now it's all gone. One definitely cannot change a process that was learnt at 15 and which changed drastically at 43 overnight.
Things at work have also been ok. My relationship with the area manager has improved a lot to the point the other day he told me while we were working on some papers (and while I was filling in for my direct boss who was absent) that my current position is now small for my abilities and that he's trying to set up a sort of "elite group of collaborators" where he plans to include me but still didn't have the go-ahead from our Director. In the meantime, It's funny to see he sends all work-related e-mails to me and just CCes my direct boss.
Now he wp's me frequently, at odd hours, and it's impossible not to think of my old boss, THE one… They are SO similar in so many ways!
I'm falling asleep. Will post part 2 soon.