(no subject)
Haven't posted in awhile.
The wedding turned out perfect. I got a little sad looking at wedding pictures, because I wish I could relive the day.
The honeymoon was so much better than I EVER could have hoped for. We went to Montego Bay Jamaica, and stayed at Royal Carribean Sandals. It was the best..... :) Hooray.
All this fun over the last few weeks has actually made me sort of reconsider medical school. I think treating patients will be extremely rewarding, but I can't help but to be scared and worried a bit about what the future holds. Some doctors tell me that if they had it to do over again, they would absolutely not do it, but others love their jobs. I guess it is that way though in every profession.
I think also, since school is getting closer, it's making me think more and more about it. I hate being away from Paul so much, and not really getting the time to visit with my family in Logan very often. That's stressful to me, and I knjow the next few years will include a lot of it. But, they are all extremely understanding of it. Paul does what he can to make sure we spend time together, my parents come to Morgantown to visit me, and don't get mad when I have to study while they are there.
My biggest worry is that in a few years all this WON'T be worth it. I guess everyone has fears about the future though. Maybe it would be unnatural not to have fears. I've met many doctors who are very happy with their lives, and some who aren't, but I wonder if it has to do more wiht their attitude toward things, rather than other factors. My dad says that's probably all it is.
My other worry is that I'll finish residency and have to work 70 hours a weke or something. But, I've read over and over that there are MANY part time doctor jobs, and that there are several specialties where the doctor really doesn't work over 40 or 45 hours per week anyway.
Plus, I've started thinking about having kids for some weird reason. I should probably just baby sit a little and get that out of my system right this second. I think waiting till I'm 31 or so to have kids would be much smarter for me. Now that I think about it, I look over at some kids next to me here in Panera and they are annoying me just to watch them. They move around a lot. Their mother is filling out a job application for Panera. One thing's for sure: sticking through the next few hard years will assure me that I won't have to do that.
I guess I'm just wondering if people could comment and let me know if this is normal to have these fears and doubts. I get scared that I'll have to work so much that I'll spend a lot of time lonely because I won't see Paul or something, but I know lots of doctors who have made plenty of time for their families. It just seems that when I tell someone I'm in medical school, I get a reaction like, "Oh! You're crazy....doctors work way way too mcuh, how could you do that!?" I mean, my brother is a coal miner and works 72 hours a week. And many doctors DO have families successfully...not the surgeon mommies as much as others, but it's been done.
I want to do it, I'm just feeling a little scared right now.
The wedding turned out perfect. I got a little sad looking at wedding pictures, because I wish I could relive the day.
The honeymoon was so much better than I EVER could have hoped for. We went to Montego Bay Jamaica, and stayed at Royal Carribean Sandals. It was the best..... :) Hooray.
All this fun over the last few weeks has actually made me sort of reconsider medical school. I think treating patients will be extremely rewarding, but I can't help but to be scared and worried a bit about what the future holds. Some doctors tell me that if they had it to do over again, they would absolutely not do it, but others love their jobs. I guess it is that way though in every profession.
I think also, since school is getting closer, it's making me think more and more about it. I hate being away from Paul so much, and not really getting the time to visit with my family in Logan very often. That's stressful to me, and I knjow the next few years will include a lot of it. But, they are all extremely understanding of it. Paul does what he can to make sure we spend time together, my parents come to Morgantown to visit me, and don't get mad when I have to study while they are there.
My biggest worry is that in a few years all this WON'T be worth it. I guess everyone has fears about the future though. Maybe it would be unnatural not to have fears. I've met many doctors who are very happy with their lives, and some who aren't, but I wonder if it has to do more wiht their attitude toward things, rather than other factors. My dad says that's probably all it is.
My other worry is that I'll finish residency and have to work 70 hours a weke or something. But, I've read over and over that there are MANY part time doctor jobs, and that there are several specialties where the doctor really doesn't work over 40 or 45 hours per week anyway.
Plus, I've started thinking about having kids for some weird reason. I should probably just baby sit a little and get that out of my system right this second. I think waiting till I'm 31 or so to have kids would be much smarter for me. Now that I think about it, I look over at some kids next to me here in Panera and they are annoying me just to watch them. They move around a lot. Their mother is filling out a job application for Panera. One thing's for sure: sticking through the next few hard years will assure me that I won't have to do that.
I guess I'm just wondering if people could comment and let me know if this is normal to have these fears and doubts. I get scared that I'll have to work so much that I'll spend a lot of time lonely because I won't see Paul or something, but I know lots of doctors who have made plenty of time for their families. It just seems that when I tell someone I'm in medical school, I get a reaction like, "Oh! You're crazy....doctors work way way too mcuh, how could you do that!?" I mean, my brother is a coal miner and works 72 hours a week. And many doctors DO have families successfully...not the surgeon mommies as much as others, but it's been done.
I want to do it, I'm just feeling a little scared right now.