Day two. Nothing new.
I have a serious problem. At least, I think I do…
Most things in my life are based on an illusion. And no matter how many times I get kicked in the face -and I get kicked a lot - I like it that way. I enjoy my fantasies, I take all of it in, I yearn, I ache, I even - oh, the horror!- love… But it’s all in my head. I’m waiting for something… And though I feel enough is enough, I can’t seem to stop…
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I sat on the top of a mountain made of chimpanzee skulls. In my mind, I held the answer to humanities prayers. Do not fear. Do not trust. Made a deal with my personal demon. Said he would learn how to love. On one condition: I accept Misery’s invitation. Become witness to the ultimate fall of joy. Everywhere I cast my gaze I see madness devouring the innocent. When did I lose faith? Did I lose it in the first place? Or did it grow tired of my inactivity and went wandering? Must be that… You have exactly three seconds to kiss away the blood from my hands. You choose to pretend, to cease all movement, to bid your time. Inspiring me to give up. I will not. There is nothing left to give. I will trick you. And when you pounce, I will be ready to disappear along with your dreams, leaving only an echo of laughter. And a single tear. Maybe… I should haunt your sanctuary…
I’m failing. All I ever craved was a chance to talk to the rain… A crow swooped down to tell me the tale of two souls. Didn’t finish, dropped dead, with a sly twinkle in its eye. I sobbed, tore at the wise creature with my teeth, rubbed my face against its fading feathers. Then silence. Justice for all… Except me..?
Most things in my life are based on an illusion. And no matter how many times I get kicked in the face -and I get kicked a lot - I like it that way. I enjoy my fantasies, I take all of it in, I yearn, I ache, I even - oh, the horror!- love… But it’s all in my head. I’m waiting for something… And though I feel enough is enough, I can’t seem to stop…
______________________________________________________________________
I sat on the top of a mountain made of chimpanzee skulls. In my mind, I held the answer to humanities prayers. Do not fear. Do not trust. Made a deal with my personal demon. Said he would learn how to love. On one condition: I accept Misery’s invitation. Become witness to the ultimate fall of joy. Everywhere I cast my gaze I see madness devouring the innocent. When did I lose faith? Did I lose it in the first place? Or did it grow tired of my inactivity and went wandering? Must be that… You have exactly three seconds to kiss away the blood from my hands. You choose to pretend, to cease all movement, to bid your time. Inspiring me to give up. I will not. There is nothing left to give. I will trick you. And when you pounce, I will be ready to disappear along with your dreams, leaving only an echo of laughter. And a single tear. Maybe… I should haunt your sanctuary…
I’m failing. All I ever craved was a chance to talk to the rain… A crow swooped down to tell me the tale of two souls. Didn’t finish, dropped dead, with a sly twinkle in its eye. I sobbed, tore at the wise creature with my teeth, rubbed my face against its fading feathers. Then silence. Justice for all… Except me..?