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Only two people picked me up. Hitching toward and from the mountain, only two people picked me up.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Saturaday afternoon I decided to climb one of these bitches. One of these huge mountains that mocked me so. "I'm a mountain, you are merely a human." Fuck you!
I decided on that one, the one that was so close to me I could taste it.
But it wasn't so simple. Of course it wasn't going to be... it's a fucking mountain. I was on my way about 6.00pm. Army sleeping bag prepared, a couple of beers in my bag, sparks firing in my brain, and battery full of energy ready to stream beats a rythm and amazing music to my ears. I was off. I knew it was for real when I heard "Ants Marching" as my first song.
Us petty humans.
I saw this as a sort of adventure, not so much in the sense of testing things around me... but sort of testing everything I've com to believe and a sort of realization of othings. But what I actually jcame to realize was a little more that I bargained for I supposel. After all, it's not every day that a man comes to himself, bleeding and tormented and asks why he's here and asks for some sort of purpose to this thing called life.
If there were no reward to (reap / heal),
No loving embrace to see me through
This tedious path I've chosen here,
I certainly would've walked away by now.
Gonna wait it out.
If there were no desire to heal
A damaged and broken man along
This tedious path I've chosen here
I certainly would've walked away by now.
If there were no reward to reap
No loving embrace to see me through
This tedious path I've chosen here,
I certainly would've walked away by now.
Gonna wait it out.
If there were no desire to heal
A damaged and broken man along
This tedious path I've chosen here
I certainly would've walked away by now.
As I started, nothing but faith at my core, nothing but belief and faith. And as it began I come to realize what was in front of me.
As I stopped and asked for dircetion at countless place I kept hearing "I hope you're in shape..." hah... "I hope so too."
As I walked, texting Daniel-san, Jen-Jen, Jackie, and Christoff, I saw hence a couple opsticles.
A gated community, the fat of the land in front me. people: "wanting their privacy..." FUCKERS. The rent-a-cop told me at the front that there was no way though here and that it would be best to go toward the zoo and go up through there.... quote un-quote. Fuck that... I've I'd come this far why couldn't you let me through... let me reach my goal.
BAH...!! No goal comes without distractions, no goal comes without time and sacrifice.
Dark side of the moon is a masterpiece. I heard it at least twice on my journey. And it lead my through some thick messes, when my feet were sore and shoulders aching from carrying that damn pack.
But it was all good. As I walked I was picked up, close to beginning my journey, by Micheal. A soldier obviously just coming off his shift at FT. CARSON.
He Asked me what I was doing, I told me without hesitations. And he Explained to me some hardships that he's had, I found it funny how a person can express him/herself with a stranger. I guess there aren't any bourndaries when it comes to meeting new people. Boundaries is one thing I came to understand a bit more....
Micheal said he would find me at BRU if he needed more people for his business. I will be thankfull if that happens, because they get paid a pretty hefty sum.
Walking, Walking, Walking...I cannot enfasize that point enough. Through hills, up and down, up down up down........ *sigh. Thank god I had that music buzzing through my ears, always driving me along...
A SUBWAY! I walked in and the guys said "AWW, we're closed but since I forgot to lock the door I'll make you for sandwiches." YEAH SON! He threw in an extra cookie too. Heh, that might not seem like plenty to the lot of you, but to me, about to embark on this bitch, and not even half-way yet... it meant something.... like if "all the pieces fit"
OH and apparently if you are searching for drugs of any type, Manatou Springs is the place to go around here, I swear I have never seen such scandolous shit in my life...hah. Eye opener indeed.
By then it was late and I was getting every closer to the mountain... "Ruxton" I was told... 15 min...no no....45 min.....ugh...... Walking Walking Walking....
Finally I got to it. Ruxton and Cog railroad/ Mountain Man/ Barr Trail.
The Long hard journey uphill, weaving to-and-fro up the mountain, for some reason the song "Passive" gave me a lot to think about through those first few hours. I was thinking about a few grildfriends I have had in the past and how things seem to matter less as time goes by, and yet at those moments they were all that mattered. Or somehow I, or mankind, or the situation meant more feelings than before.... or than I cared to recognized
Wake up
and face me
Don't play dead
cuz maybe
Someday I'll walk away and say
You fucking disappoint me
Maybe you're better off this way
Go ahead and play dead
I know that you can hear this
Go ahead and play dead
Why can't you turn and face me
You fucking disappoint me
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Saturaday afternoon I decided to climb one of these bitches. One of these huge mountains that mocked me so. "I'm a mountain, you are merely a human." Fuck you!
I decided on that one, the one that was so close to me I could taste it.
But it wasn't so simple. Of course it wasn't going to be... it's a fucking mountain. I was on my way about 6.00pm. Army sleeping bag prepared, a couple of beers in my bag, sparks firing in my brain, and battery full of energy ready to stream beats a rythm and amazing music to my ears. I was off. I knew it was for real when I heard "Ants Marching" as my first song.
Us petty humans.
I saw this as a sort of adventure, not so much in the sense of testing things around me... but sort of testing everything I've com to believe and a sort of realization of othings. But what I actually jcame to realize was a little more that I bargained for I supposel. After all, it's not every day that a man comes to himself, bleeding and tormented and asks why he's here and asks for some sort of purpose to this thing called life.
If there were no reward to (reap / heal),
No loving embrace to see me through
This tedious path I've chosen here,
I certainly would've walked away by now.
Gonna wait it out.
If there were no desire to heal
A damaged and broken man along
This tedious path I've chosen here
I certainly would've walked away by now.
If there were no reward to reap
No loving embrace to see me through
This tedious path I've chosen here,
I certainly would've walked away by now.
Gonna wait it out.
If there were no desire to heal
A damaged and broken man along
This tedious path I've chosen here
I certainly would've walked away by now.
As I started, nothing but faith at my core, nothing but belief and faith. And as it began I come to realize what was in front of me.
As I stopped and asked for dircetion at countless place I kept hearing "I hope you're in shape..." hah... "I hope so too."
As I walked, texting Daniel-san, Jen-Jen, Jackie, and Christoff, I saw hence a couple opsticles.
A gated community, the fat of the land in front me. people: "wanting their privacy..." FUCKERS. The rent-a-cop told me at the front that there was no way though here and that it would be best to go toward the zoo and go up through there.... quote un-quote. Fuck that... I've I'd come this far why couldn't you let me through... let me reach my goal.
BAH...!! No goal comes without distractions, no goal comes without time and sacrifice.
Dark side of the moon is a masterpiece. I heard it at least twice on my journey. And it lead my through some thick messes, when my feet were sore and shoulders aching from carrying that damn pack.
But it was all good. As I walked I was picked up, close to beginning my journey, by Micheal. A soldier obviously just coming off his shift at FT. CARSON.
He Asked me what I was doing, I told me without hesitations. And he Explained to me some hardships that he's had, I found it funny how a person can express him/herself with a stranger. I guess there aren't any bourndaries when it comes to meeting new people. Boundaries is one thing I came to understand a bit more....
Micheal said he would find me at BRU if he needed more people for his business. I will be thankfull if that happens, because they get paid a pretty hefty sum.
Walking, Walking, Walking...I cannot enfasize that point enough. Through hills, up and down, up down up down........ *sigh. Thank god I had that music buzzing through my ears, always driving me along...
A SUBWAY! I walked in and the guys said "AWW, we're closed but since I forgot to lock the door I'll make you for sandwiches." YEAH SON! He threw in an extra cookie too. Heh, that might not seem like plenty to the lot of you, but to me, about to embark on this bitch, and not even half-way yet... it meant something.... like if "all the pieces fit"
OH and apparently if you are searching for drugs of any type, Manatou Springs is the place to go around here, I swear I have never seen such scandolous shit in my life...hah. Eye opener indeed.
By then it was late and I was getting every closer to the mountain... "Ruxton" I was told... 15 min...no no....45 min.....ugh...... Walking Walking Walking....
Finally I got to it. Ruxton and Cog railroad/ Mountain Man/ Barr Trail.
The Long hard journey uphill, weaving to-and-fro up the mountain, for some reason the song "Passive" gave me a lot to think about through those first few hours. I was thinking about a few grildfriends I have had in the past and how things seem to matter less as time goes by, and yet at those moments they were all that mattered. Or somehow I, or mankind, or the situation meant more feelings than before.... or than I cared to recognized
Wake up
and face me
Don't play dead
cuz maybe
Someday I'll walk away and say
You fucking disappoint me
Maybe you're better off this way
Go ahead and play dead
I know that you can hear this
Go ahead and play dead
Why can't you turn and face me
You fucking disappoint me