Good Night and Good Luck [Asuka, Kureno]
[[Set back to two or three days before everyone leaves for the gala.]]
"Not bad. Today you only fell short by two streets instead of four. At this point, we can get a drink at the Birch again sometime next month." It looked like Asuka was wanting to give him quite the nasty glare, but ultimately decided catching her breath was more important. "You know, if you'd been walking and exercising all this time like you should have been, this would be a piece of cake for you by now." Ah, it looked like Asuka remembered a single finger salute could say all the nasty things she was thinking on her behalf. Kureno just shook his head and rolled his eyes as he stood waiting for her.
For the past month now he'd been dropping by once or twice a week to drag her out of her house (sometimes quite literally) and take a walk. Partially because it was something to do together; mostly because she needed the exercise since he'd heard she wasn't being very good at keeping up with her own physical therapy. The past couple of weeks had seen a big improvement however, and while he wasn't sure of the reason for her being more agreeable with working out, he figured as long as he didn't ask she wouldn't think to talk herself out of it. For now, he allowed them to work under the motivational bribe that he'd buy all the drinks the day she proved she could make it to the White Birch (their favorite hang-out) and back without collapsing at the end. Asuka could already make it there, but doubling up the trip in one shot ("But I'll be able to make it home after I've rested after a drink!" "Which you'll be buying with your own money because my condition is there and back with no stops and no dying. Besides, you'll probably be too drunk to walk and I'll end up carrying you home anyway." "Not if it's only one drink!" "You're only going to have one drink with me paying?" "..........dammit.") was a challenge she was falling just short of. Although...not so short anymore. A month was an exaggeration, at this point it could be as early as next visit. Kureno wondered what he'd have to bribe her with next.
"Too bad," he mulled a little too wistfully to be sincere, meaning he was taking another shot at her again. "I really felt like going to town on the rounds tonight."
"Bite me," she retorted in irritation, as one finger just wasn't enough to get her point across anymore. This wouldn't be so bad if he didn't have to go opening his mouth all the damn time. Asuka was well aware he was doing it specifically to get a rise out of her, and the more mature thing would be to ignore him and curl up in bed and do nothing and say nothing on the days he came by to drag her out... but at the same time, a part of her couldn't do that. She owed him, and if this was what he wanted her to do, then she owed him that. Nevermind how much she'd rather be in bed and sleeping the rest of her life away... which, no doubt, contributed to her crankiness. A free load of alcohol couldn't possibly be worth this, could it?
No... but seeing Kureno enjoy himself, even a little bit over such a trivial thing, after knowing what shit she'd put him through...
With a sigh that was almost more like a pant for much needed air, she finished her aborted flop, lowering herself to the curb and resting her arms on her knees. It was ridiculous how difficult it was to make the walk that wouldn't have bothered her a bit six-odd months ago. Yes, she did live several miles from the middle of town, and yes, it was going to take time to get back into shape - especially after how she'd done so little to maintain her shape - but the difficulty was frustrating. And all of it had to do with the fact that it hurt to simply breathe. The pain never went away - it got better, but it never left. Right now, though, it felt like someone was scooping the phlegm out of her chest with a spork. If only she'd thought to take a pill before coming out here....
Usually this was the moment when Kureno would choose to go overtime on his heckling and nag her back to her feet to keep going, piling the extra guilt about being out of shape on her where he could. (Kureno decided that if he did have lingering resentment toward her, her choices, or their situation, this was the healthiest outlet for it. Sure made him feel better anyway.) ...But not today. Today he let her sit and catch her breath without any further poking to her health or physique. Today he stood beside her in a relaxed stance, willing to wait.
Because today, he had something better to tease her about.
"So. I heard Hokage-sama won't be able to make the trip, after all. Heard that's going to leave you with a last-minute replacement for an escort." He held back his grin to keep from giving himself away too soon. "I also heard who that's going to be..."
Yes, she'd heard it too. Everyone must have heard it by now, though maybe not everyone would get the implications of what Tsurude Not Going meant. Leave that to Kureno, though; he was always too good at reading between the lines.
And he really didn't need to say it like that. Ibiki was a chaperon, not an escort, an escort had all sorts of terrible implications that made Asuka a little nervous inside. (Not that it was any better applying the term escort to Tsurude, but somehow that was a hundred times safer.) Okay, a lot a bit nervous. No one just went out on a pseudo date with Ibiki and survived unscathed. She'd been wondering if her sanity would survive this stupid gala even back when it was first announced to her; now she seriously wondered if she'd get back alive at all.
She just hoped she wouldn't be forced to share a room with Ibiki. Every night would be an exercise in trauma.
There really wasn't any need to respond verbally to Kureno's beginning-to-tease. Even though she wasn't looking at him, even though he was hiding that smile, she could hear it curling over his words like a cat that caught the canary. Damn him. Getting WAY too much fun out of it. He wouldn't be so smug over there if HE'D gone on a mission with Ibiki (and gotten drunk on the way back).
So instead of a verbal attack, she only groaned - a groan of much pain and loss and wishing she was somewhere far, far away where no one could ever bother her again. And then hid her face against her arms, folded over her knees. Was it even possible for life to get much shittier?
That broke the willpower that was keeping the grin back. Because really, this whole new situation was... There really must have been some hidden desire for revenge in him, because if Asuka had to get nationally recognized for her "heroics", this was the way he didn't mind seeing her go at all. It was almost like it made up for something. Yes, that was probably cruel and unusual of him to think, but it's not like she was going to die from the experience. (He trusted Ibiki more than most people did, but then again, he had accumulated an odd taste in friends over the years.) She just suddenly had a higher chance of being miserable about the event. ...Not that he believed she wanted this, heck, he knew she hated the attention, but...
In his mind, Kureno justified that once this whole gala farce was over, he would go right back to teasing Asuka in the normal way that didn't appreciate her agony so much. But in the meantime...
"Cheer up, Asuka. Ibiki's not as bad as everyone makes her out to be. The rumors about her source of power being the blood of little children and newborn kittens is completely false."
Another groan escaped her, somewhat more muffled. Hell. This was going to be hell. And Kureno was over there enjoying this way, way too much to be fair. She'd hate him for it, but she couldn't hate him for karma coming back around to bite her in ass. Asuka just wished it was Ibiki doing the biting.
"She uses stillborn puppies," the kunoichi griped at the curb between her feet. "I'm going to hell."
"It can't be that bad," he insisted. "Aki had to live with her for a few years and look at him. ...He's still alive."
Kureno knew that wasn't the best example, which is probably why he used it.
"He was already insane before then," came the complaining response. "Besides, she doesn't kill you, she just makes you wish she would."
Well she certain got him on that point. Still, he could offer Asuka some reassurance by telling her, "Ibiki did help Aki some."
Another groan. "Not helping." Not helping at all.... because she sure didn't much want to be insane.
And though the pain in her chest hadn't subsided - it wouldn't, not until she got home to the narcotics - she was breathing a little better, so Asuka pushed herself back up to her feet again. She didn't ask for a hand up, nor would she accept one if it was offered. If she couldn't walk to the damn Birch by herself, she could at least get up off her ass by herself.
"Let's keep going," she sighed.
Hmm, perhaps any sort of nagging was enough to get her back to her feet. Until she did, she was subject to listen to him after all, so it only made sense.
Letting her climb to her own feet (that was also part of her exercise/punishment), Kureno followed just a step behind her once more. And since she was technically still subject to listening to him, continued in his musings a block later. "Konohako was also supposed to be escorted by Hokage-sama, wasn't she? Maybe if you're lucky then Ibiki will get distracted enough by her to bother mentally scarring you."
Silence. Oh, blessed silence. Perhaps she could get her mind off the horrors of being 'escorted' by Ibiki in the near future to the third level of hell now that he wasn't tal-
-damnit.
It could be said that Asuka was a bitch. (It was true.) It could be said that she had a sadistic streak, that she didn't really care too much for people outside herself, that she had no understanding of familial ties and that her ability to follow orders and be trusted to follow orders was sketchy at times - all very true, to some degree or another. But even with all of that, and even with as much as she had downright hated Konohako at times, Asuka could not be so cruel as to use the girl as a way to escape Ibiki's clutches.
"That's just mean," she muttered back at her companion. "I don't want Konohako made insane from Ibiki's attention. I still have to live with her after this."
Cue the eye roll. "Right, right. My mistake for thinking that if you couldn't it'd be because she's your niece." Because of course she couldn't admit to any sentiment due to family ties. (Assuming there actually was any. He'd always found Asuka's ability to keep herself detached from those who should be closest rather impressive. ...In an unreasonably stubborn sense.)
Kureno distracted himself by returning back to his original thoughts on this. "Well, keeping an eye on her and dodging Ibiki should be keeping you busy when you're not entertaining all your would-be suitors. Have fun."
Oh. Jeez. And all the stupid people who'd been sending her gifts for the last... month-odd. Them on top of this stupid party on top of Ibiki. It was enough to make a person contemplate suicide. Not that she could - Asuka's shoulders slumped with a heavy sigh - because more than one person would resurrect her only to kill her again. Chiriku chief among them. She would never have rest, not even in the afterlife.
Her response back was sour. "No. I won't."
And then he had to go and make one of those noises he made, one of those 'I'm secretly delighting in your misery, don't mind me as I casually pretend I'm not amused back here' huffs of air (he made them a lot around her), which only made her launch into full whine mode.
"I mean, I don't even know what the hell the dress thing they want to put me into looks like," Asuka complained. She knew it was going to be a kind of kimono, because the Daimyo was all up into the most traditional of affairs (oh god, she hoped he didn't make them sit through a tea ceremony), but that was about the extent of her knowledge. "They just took my measurements, told me I better not gain any weight or they'd carve it off me with a kunai, and sent it all off to the Daimyo. World knows what kind of crap I'm going to end up wearing."
Aaaaah, and how could he forget about the dress? ...Or, whatever extremely feminine thing she was going to be wearing. Asuka was notorious for her allergy to girly habits, even more than Kakami (but Kakami had gotten a boyfriend recently so her womanly side had been coming through a little more often), and Kureno had tried more than once to blackmail convince Asuka to don some evening wear for a night out. That was really his only regret about not attending the gala, as he'd miss seeing her in such a thing. He'd have to ask Kaka--no, wait, Kakami would be in a dress too. He didn't want to miss that either.
"I'll have to ask Rin to take pictures."
"I'll break it," she threatened, quite threateningly.
"Good luck," he replied, unimpressed. "You'll probably be too preoccupied to even get close, what with all the dodging and babysitting you'll have to do. In uncomfortable shoes, no less." Kureno glanced sideways at her. "You're just going to have to face it, Asuka. Unless Hokage-sama suddenly recovers, nothing's going to make this trip more bearable."
Her shoulders slumped more. No, this whole trip was going to be a nightmare. Dealing with this 'honor'. Dealing with the people who had to attend. Dealing with the Daimyo. Dealing with Chiriku and the other Twelve (all the once - she'd never met them before all at once. This was going to be scary.). Dealing with her suitors. Dealing with Ibiki. Dealing with the guilt. He was right. There was nothing that was going to make this trip more bearable.
"..... you would."
He looked down at her, wondering if he'd heard right but already knowing he had. Participating in the gala's events did seem like the kind of thing most people wouldn't be surprised to see from him--at least as long as you ignored the celebration's purpose. However, due to the circumstances (his circumstances), unless the Hokage or Daimyo invited him personally, it was safe to assume he no longer fit the criteria given for attendance. He knew that; Asuka knew that, and therefore...
"You know I can't come."
Couldn't come because he didn't want to, maybe, and she couldn't fault him for that. This was totally his kind of deal, but who the hell would want to go if they weren't paid for it?
"Tsurude isn't coming anymore," she pointed out. If Tsurude wasn't there to say 'no,' what was the hold up?
"I'm pretty sure he still doesn't want me going." It hadn't been said, but Kureno had picked up on the feeling of such. "Besides, I'm only a jounin in title now and not much else." He was a little surprised by how he was able to say that so passively. Sure he'd had time to get used to it but he'd never talked about it aloud before; not like it was just some other common-placed fact anyway. Even more surprising was how he wasn't covering up for any hidden resentment when he did say it. Surprising and...encouraging.
"So?" What the hell did that matter? "Why the hell is Konohako going? She doesn't have any rank or important titles. Neither do I, when you ignore the rest of this bullshit. Who needs rank or titles?"
"Konohako still has her relation to the Sandaime," he countered. "That gives her rank enough through association. Whereas for myself, no one remembers the Yuuhi clan anymore, but that's fine with me." Life could possibly be more difficult otherwise.
.... dang, he had her with that one. Asuka didn't know anything about the Yuuhi clan either (was there one at all? She couldn't recall any other Yuuhi's besides Kureno...), so that wasn't something she could argue with. Unfortunately, name did carry meaning, and the Sarutobi name, while scarce at this point of history, did carry quite a lot of meaning in the ninja community. And therefore to all the rich people who wanted to make good with the ninja community. .... damnit.
A change in tact was in order, then. Some other way to may convince him to come along - because the more she thought about it, no matter how awkward things were between them right now (because things were still very awkward), his presence would make life so much more bearable at this gala. But how to get him to come when no one in their sane mind would come unless they were paid.....
Hmm...
"What if I paid for a mission?" she wondered out loud.
That made him stop and blink. "What?" A mission? ...Granted, if he were given such a task he would be duty-bound to attend (whether or not he cared to). But honestly. "You can't be serious," he said, falling back into step.
"Would I offer to pay for a mission if I wasn't serious?" she shot back. Missions were no cheap things, except for the super cheap D-ranks. Frankly, if you wanted something done, it was cheaper to do it yourself, but unfortunately, this wasn't something she could just 'do herself'. This was something she was more than willing to pay a hefty chunk of change for.
"Besides," she continued, "Tsurude is always bitching about Konoha being in debt. Do you think if I paid for a mission for you to come, that Tsurude would let you?"
That was hard to say. On the one hand, a mission was a mission and once the contract was signed there wasn't really any whimsically changing one's mind. On the other hand, the Hokage was not obligated to accept every mission request that landed on his desk. Normally a refusal required a reason more substantial than just not wanting to, but in this case, Kureno wouldn't put it past their village leader to make it a matter of opinion. Although on a more rational note, allowing him to attend a luxurious ball with lush accommodations didn't really fit into the lines of his punishment. (Unless he took a more psychological view on it, sending him to witness the honoring of the person he saved at the cost of his career.)
He waited until they were approaching her steps (which wasn't too long after) before answering.
"...Is this more about you wanting me to come or about you not wanting to be left under Ibiki's care?"
The long silence before he chose to answer was probably a good indication of his refusal. Or negative thinking on Tsurude's response, or out-and-out just not wanting to go. Which of course she couldn't blame him for. It probably wasn't even really right of her to want him to come, because seriously, it was just one more slap in the face, wasn't it? Making him be there was worse than just having him know it was happening. Maybe she shouldn't have suggested it in the first place... stupid selfishness.
".... both," Asuka admitted, a bit hesitantly. Not that she'd be able to get out of Ibiki's care even if Kureno did come, but...
In a way it was all rather flattering, Asuka actually willing to dig into her savings just for a chance at getting him to come with her. She was rather cheap by nature--no, more like she was simply easy to please and never sought anything expensive. She'd rather reserve her money for cigarettes than for a fancy home and clothes, and she'd take anything she could get for free just so she'd have the spare cash for beer. (Or more cigarettes as she often got beer free too, thanks to him.) His company being something she would pay for herself really meant something...
Something probably like, "You're pretty desperate, aren't you."
"Am not," she protested immediately. It wasn't like she'd die on this trip (though what remained of her pride was likely going to be chopped into itty bitty pieces and fed to the koi), or that anything terrible was going to happen (except for anything Ibiki might do to her while the door was closed), but it was.... not going to be fun. And his presence would help make up for the shit she was going to feeling like... after all, if he'd been managing to pull her out of bed to go on walks for these last few weeks, and been the one to cheer her up when it felt like there was no cheering up to be doing, he'd definitely make a difference at this stupid gala.
... but... at the same time, it wasn't really right for him to go. Not because he'd screwed up, not because Tsurude didn't want him to go, but because it was yet another slap in the face, a poke at his pride, all those things he didn't deserve. It didn't matter how much she wanted him to go or how well he might fit into something like this. It wasn't right to make him go through this, too.
Asuka mounted the steps to her porch, shaking out her keys and shaking her head at the same time. ".... nevermind," she amended after a moment, voice slipping towards something more tired. "I really shouldn't have asked."
Kureno wondered when it had become instinctive of him to comfort and assure her, so much so that he had to put forth effort into not telling her he didn't mind that she asked. Or that he was even a little glad she asked, and felt rather complimented by her wanting his company for support. He had to remember not to tell her that he did wish he could come, if only so she could feel more at ease, because no matter what the mean streak in him felt, he wasn't actually getting happiness out of her suffering (just some justice). And he had to stop himself from telling her that yes she should have asked, that she should always ask, that he wanted her to ask any time the question came into her mind. Just because he may not give her the answer she wanted, didn't mean he didn't want to hear what it was she wanted--especially if she wanted him.
...But that was all a little too much, and fell outside of the new boundaries he'd placed between himself and Asuka. So he didn't say anything about it and let her continue to think she was right to think she was wrong, and that he perhaps was in agreement in wishing she hadn't.
He watched wordlessly as she unlocked her door, leaning against the wall beside it and not moving to come in. "This is probably the last time I'll drop by before you have to head off. Keep exercising," Kureno said with a pointed look. "We'll see if you're not two blocks better by the time you get back."
This lack of response felt a lot easier to interpret - saying nothing because he agreed with her, but didn't want to come off as a jerk or make her feel bad. (He did that sometimes, except for when he was PMSing.) Asuka would prefer it if he actually did come out and agree with her, though; maybe then it would be a little easier to apologize. Not that she didn't already have enough to apologize for, but...
The kunoichi nodded as she pushed the door open. She would be better by the time they could go for another walk; Kureno seemed to enjoy her progress, so she'd make certain to keep working on it for him. No matter how frequently her motivation slipped. "As long as Ibiki doesn't take off my toes while I'm gone, I will be," she said with a forced smile (because even joking about Ibiki taking off her toes was a little scary). "I'll make sure to get a souvenir for you."
"If she does take them, your toes don't count." He had to grin at the face she made then, although with more sympathy than when this conversation had started. "Don't go out of your way. It may distract you from surviving long enough to come home, and that's the important part. ...Not that I'm looking forward to emptying my wallet when you finally get through one of our walks without dying, but..."
"Then next time don't make a promise you don't look forward to keeping," she shot back. Banter, that was easy; it was comfortable and normal and would leave things on a better note than the flop she'd made in asking him to come to the gala. "I want you willing, not whining. And anyway, with as long as it's been since I've had a drink, I'll probably pass out after the first beer, anyway."
"Oh good," he said with a roll of his eyes. "Because I've been wanting to make sure you can walk all the way back to your house this whole time just so I could carry you."
"It's the price you pay," came her serious response. "You can lead an Asuka to a bar, but you can't make her not drink."
"Tch, especially not when someone else is picking up the bill. ...Or when you've just been freed from Ibiki's presence...huh. I'd better start saving up now and tell the Birch to stock up."
Asuka laughed, unable to remain serious after a response like that. "Better go tell them now. The sooner you both start, the better."
Kureno grinned and pushed away from the wall, taking a step backwards on her porch. "Well I guess I should go do that then. Maybe shake my couch down for loose change." He paused to take a last look back. "Good luck."
And she gave him a smile for that last look back. "Thanks." Because really, she was going to need it. Between Ibiki, the people who'd been sending her gifts that she was going to have to actually meet, the Daimyo, and the general all around humiliation of this giant farce... she was going to need it.
At least she had coming home to Kureno to look forward to.
"Not bad. Today you only fell short by two streets instead of four. At this point, we can get a drink at the Birch again sometime next month." It looked like Asuka was wanting to give him quite the nasty glare, but ultimately decided catching her breath was more important. "You know, if you'd been walking and exercising all this time like you should have been, this would be a piece of cake for you by now." Ah, it looked like Asuka remembered a single finger salute could say all the nasty things she was thinking on her behalf. Kureno just shook his head and rolled his eyes as he stood waiting for her.
For the past month now he'd been dropping by once or twice a week to drag her out of her house (sometimes quite literally) and take a walk. Partially because it was something to do together; mostly because she needed the exercise since he'd heard she wasn't being very good at keeping up with her own physical therapy. The past couple of weeks had seen a big improvement however, and while he wasn't sure of the reason for her being more agreeable with working out, he figured as long as he didn't ask she wouldn't think to talk herself out of it. For now, he allowed them to work under the motivational bribe that he'd buy all the drinks the day she proved she could make it to the White Birch (their favorite hang-out) and back without collapsing at the end. Asuka could already make it there, but doubling up the trip in one shot ("But I'll be able to make it home after I've rested after a drink!" "Which you'll be buying with your own money because my condition is there and back with no stops and no dying. Besides, you'll probably be too drunk to walk and I'll end up carrying you home anyway." "Not if it's only one drink!" "You're only going to have one drink with me paying?" "..........dammit.") was a challenge she was falling just short of. Although...not so short anymore. A month was an exaggeration, at this point it could be as early as next visit. Kureno wondered what he'd have to bribe her with next.
"Too bad," he mulled a little too wistfully to be sincere, meaning he was taking another shot at her again. "I really felt like going to town on the rounds tonight."
"Bite me," she retorted in irritation, as one finger just wasn't enough to get her point across anymore. This wouldn't be so bad if he didn't have to go opening his mouth all the damn time. Asuka was well aware he was doing it specifically to get a rise out of her, and the more mature thing would be to ignore him and curl up in bed and do nothing and say nothing on the days he came by to drag her out... but at the same time, a part of her couldn't do that. She owed him, and if this was what he wanted her to do, then she owed him that. Nevermind how much she'd rather be in bed and sleeping the rest of her life away... which, no doubt, contributed to her crankiness. A free load of alcohol couldn't possibly be worth this, could it?
No... but seeing Kureno enjoy himself, even a little bit over such a trivial thing, after knowing what shit she'd put him through...
With a sigh that was almost more like a pant for much needed air, she finished her aborted flop, lowering herself to the curb and resting her arms on her knees. It was ridiculous how difficult it was to make the walk that wouldn't have bothered her a bit six-odd months ago. Yes, she did live several miles from the middle of town, and yes, it was going to take time to get back into shape - especially after how she'd done so little to maintain her shape - but the difficulty was frustrating. And all of it had to do with the fact that it hurt to simply breathe. The pain never went away - it got better, but it never left. Right now, though, it felt like someone was scooping the phlegm out of her chest with a spork. If only she'd thought to take a pill before coming out here....
Usually this was the moment when Kureno would choose to go overtime on his heckling and nag her back to her feet to keep going, piling the extra guilt about being out of shape on her where he could. (Kureno decided that if he did have lingering resentment toward her, her choices, or their situation, this was the healthiest outlet for it. Sure made him feel better anyway.) ...But not today. Today he let her sit and catch her breath without any further poking to her health or physique. Today he stood beside her in a relaxed stance, willing to wait.
Because today, he had something better to tease her about.
"So. I heard Hokage-sama won't be able to make the trip, after all. Heard that's going to leave you with a last-minute replacement for an escort." He held back his grin to keep from giving himself away too soon. "I also heard who that's going to be..."
Yes, she'd heard it too. Everyone must have heard it by now, though maybe not everyone would get the implications of what Tsurude Not Going meant. Leave that to Kureno, though; he was always too good at reading between the lines.
And he really didn't need to say it like that. Ibiki was a chaperon, not an escort, an escort had all sorts of terrible implications that made Asuka a little nervous inside. (Not that it was any better applying the term escort to Tsurude, but somehow that was a hundred times safer.) Okay, a lot a bit nervous. No one just went out on a pseudo date with Ibiki and survived unscathed. She'd been wondering if her sanity would survive this stupid gala even back when it was first announced to her; now she seriously wondered if she'd get back alive at all.
She just hoped she wouldn't be forced to share a room with Ibiki. Every night would be an exercise in trauma.
There really wasn't any need to respond verbally to Kureno's beginning-to-tease. Even though she wasn't looking at him, even though he was hiding that smile, she could hear it curling over his words like a cat that caught the canary. Damn him. Getting WAY too much fun out of it. He wouldn't be so smug over there if HE'D gone on a mission with Ibiki (and gotten drunk on the way back).
So instead of a verbal attack, she only groaned - a groan of much pain and loss and wishing she was somewhere far, far away where no one could ever bother her again. And then hid her face against her arms, folded over her knees. Was it even possible for life to get much shittier?
That broke the willpower that was keeping the grin back. Because really, this whole new situation was... There really must have been some hidden desire for revenge in him, because if Asuka had to get nationally recognized for her "heroics", this was the way he didn't mind seeing her go at all. It was almost like it made up for something. Yes, that was probably cruel and unusual of him to think, but it's not like she was going to die from the experience. (He trusted Ibiki more than most people did, but then again, he had accumulated an odd taste in friends over the years.) She just suddenly had a higher chance of being miserable about the event. ...Not that he believed she wanted this, heck, he knew she hated the attention, but...
In his mind, Kureno justified that once this whole gala farce was over, he would go right back to teasing Asuka in the normal way that didn't appreciate her agony so much. But in the meantime...
"Cheer up, Asuka. Ibiki's not as bad as everyone makes her out to be. The rumors about her source of power being the blood of little children and newborn kittens is completely false."
Another groan escaped her, somewhat more muffled. Hell. This was going to be hell. And Kureno was over there enjoying this way, way too much to be fair. She'd hate him for it, but she couldn't hate him for karma coming back around to bite her in ass. Asuka just wished it was Ibiki doing the biting.
"She uses stillborn puppies," the kunoichi griped at the curb between her feet. "I'm going to hell."
"It can't be that bad," he insisted. "Aki had to live with her for a few years and look at him. ...He's still alive."
Kureno knew that wasn't the best example, which is probably why he used it.
"He was already insane before then," came the complaining response. "Besides, she doesn't kill you, she just makes you wish she would."
Well she certain got him on that point. Still, he could offer Asuka some reassurance by telling her, "Ibiki did help Aki some."
Another groan. "Not helping." Not helping at all.... because she sure didn't much want to be insane.
And though the pain in her chest hadn't subsided - it wouldn't, not until she got home to the narcotics - she was breathing a little better, so Asuka pushed herself back up to her feet again. She didn't ask for a hand up, nor would she accept one if it was offered. If she couldn't walk to the damn Birch by herself, she could at least get up off her ass by herself.
"Let's keep going," she sighed.
Hmm, perhaps any sort of nagging was enough to get her back to her feet. Until she did, she was subject to listen to him after all, so it only made sense.
Letting her climb to her own feet (that was also part of her exercise/punishment), Kureno followed just a step behind her once more. And since she was technically still subject to listening to him, continued in his musings a block later. "Konohako was also supposed to be escorted by Hokage-sama, wasn't she? Maybe if you're lucky then Ibiki will get distracted enough by her to bother mentally scarring you."
Silence. Oh, blessed silence. Perhaps she could get her mind off the horrors of being 'escorted' by Ibiki in the near future to the third level of hell now that he wasn't tal-
-damnit.
It could be said that Asuka was a bitch. (It was true.) It could be said that she had a sadistic streak, that she didn't really care too much for people outside herself, that she had no understanding of familial ties and that her ability to follow orders and be trusted to follow orders was sketchy at times - all very true, to some degree or another. But even with all of that, and even with as much as she had downright hated Konohako at times, Asuka could not be so cruel as to use the girl as a way to escape Ibiki's clutches.
"That's just mean," she muttered back at her companion. "I don't want Konohako made insane from Ibiki's attention. I still have to live with her after this."
Cue the eye roll. "Right, right. My mistake for thinking that if you couldn't it'd be because she's your niece." Because of course she couldn't admit to any sentiment due to family ties. (Assuming there actually was any. He'd always found Asuka's ability to keep herself detached from those who should be closest rather impressive. ...In an unreasonably stubborn sense.)
Kureno distracted himself by returning back to his original thoughts on this. "Well, keeping an eye on her and dodging Ibiki should be keeping you busy when you're not entertaining all your would-be suitors. Have fun."
Oh. Jeez. And all the stupid people who'd been sending her gifts for the last... month-odd. Them on top of this stupid party on top of Ibiki. It was enough to make a person contemplate suicide. Not that she could - Asuka's shoulders slumped with a heavy sigh - because more than one person would resurrect her only to kill her again. Chiriku chief among them. She would never have rest, not even in the afterlife.
Her response back was sour. "No. I won't."
And then he had to go and make one of those noises he made, one of those 'I'm secretly delighting in your misery, don't mind me as I casually pretend I'm not amused back here' huffs of air (he made them a lot around her), which only made her launch into full whine mode.
"I mean, I don't even know what the hell the dress thing they want to put me into looks like," Asuka complained. She knew it was going to be a kind of kimono, because the Daimyo was all up into the most traditional of affairs (oh god, she hoped he didn't make them sit through a tea ceremony), but that was about the extent of her knowledge. "They just took my measurements, told me I better not gain any weight or they'd carve it off me with a kunai, and sent it all off to the Daimyo. World knows what kind of crap I'm going to end up wearing."
Aaaaah, and how could he forget about the dress? ...Or, whatever extremely feminine thing she was going to be wearing. Asuka was notorious for her allergy to girly habits, even more than Kakami (but Kakami had gotten a boyfriend recently so her womanly side had been coming through a little more often), and Kureno had tried more than once to blackmail convince Asuka to don some evening wear for a night out. That was really his only regret about not attending the gala, as he'd miss seeing her in such a thing. He'd have to ask Kaka--no, wait, Kakami would be in a dress too. He didn't want to miss that either.
"I'll have to ask Rin to take pictures."
"I'll break it," she threatened, quite threateningly.
"Good luck," he replied, unimpressed. "You'll probably be too preoccupied to even get close, what with all the dodging and babysitting you'll have to do. In uncomfortable shoes, no less." Kureno glanced sideways at her. "You're just going to have to face it, Asuka. Unless Hokage-sama suddenly recovers, nothing's going to make this trip more bearable."
Her shoulders slumped more. No, this whole trip was going to be a nightmare. Dealing with this 'honor'. Dealing with the people who had to attend. Dealing with the Daimyo. Dealing with Chiriku and the other Twelve (all the once - she'd never met them before all at once. This was going to be scary.). Dealing with her suitors. Dealing with Ibiki. Dealing with the guilt. He was right. There was nothing that was going to make this trip more bearable.
"..... you would."
He looked down at her, wondering if he'd heard right but already knowing he had. Participating in the gala's events did seem like the kind of thing most people wouldn't be surprised to see from him--at least as long as you ignored the celebration's purpose. However, due to the circumstances (his circumstances), unless the Hokage or Daimyo invited him personally, it was safe to assume he no longer fit the criteria given for attendance. He knew that; Asuka knew that, and therefore...
"You know I can't come."
Couldn't come because he didn't want to, maybe, and she couldn't fault him for that. This was totally his kind of deal, but who the hell would want to go if they weren't paid for it?
"Tsurude isn't coming anymore," she pointed out. If Tsurude wasn't there to say 'no,' what was the hold up?
"I'm pretty sure he still doesn't want me going." It hadn't been said, but Kureno had picked up on the feeling of such. "Besides, I'm only a jounin in title now and not much else." He was a little surprised by how he was able to say that so passively. Sure he'd had time to get used to it but he'd never talked about it aloud before; not like it was just some other common-placed fact anyway. Even more surprising was how he wasn't covering up for any hidden resentment when he did say it. Surprising and...encouraging.
"So?" What the hell did that matter? "Why the hell is Konohako going? She doesn't have any rank or important titles. Neither do I, when you ignore the rest of this bullshit. Who needs rank or titles?"
"Konohako still has her relation to the Sandaime," he countered. "That gives her rank enough through association. Whereas for myself, no one remembers the Yuuhi clan anymore, but that's fine with me." Life could possibly be more difficult otherwise.
.... dang, he had her with that one. Asuka didn't know anything about the Yuuhi clan either (was there one at all? She couldn't recall any other Yuuhi's besides Kureno...), so that wasn't something she could argue with. Unfortunately, name did carry meaning, and the Sarutobi name, while scarce at this point of history, did carry quite a lot of meaning in the ninja community. And therefore to all the rich people who wanted to make good with the ninja community. .... damnit.
A change in tact was in order, then. Some other way to may convince him to come along - because the more she thought about it, no matter how awkward things were between them right now (because things were still very awkward), his presence would make life so much more bearable at this gala. But how to get him to come when no one in their sane mind would come unless they were paid.....
Hmm...
"What if I paid for a mission?" she wondered out loud.
That made him stop and blink. "What?" A mission? ...Granted, if he were given such a task he would be duty-bound to attend (whether or not he cared to). But honestly. "You can't be serious," he said, falling back into step.
"Would I offer to pay for a mission if I wasn't serious?" she shot back. Missions were no cheap things, except for the super cheap D-ranks. Frankly, if you wanted something done, it was cheaper to do it yourself, but unfortunately, this wasn't something she could just 'do herself'. This was something she was more than willing to pay a hefty chunk of change for.
"Besides," she continued, "Tsurude is always bitching about Konoha being in debt. Do you think if I paid for a mission for you to come, that Tsurude would let you?"
That was hard to say. On the one hand, a mission was a mission and once the contract was signed there wasn't really any whimsically changing one's mind. On the other hand, the Hokage was not obligated to accept every mission request that landed on his desk. Normally a refusal required a reason more substantial than just not wanting to, but in this case, Kureno wouldn't put it past their village leader to make it a matter of opinion. Although on a more rational note, allowing him to attend a luxurious ball with lush accommodations didn't really fit into the lines of his punishment. (Unless he took a more psychological view on it, sending him to witness the honoring of the person he saved at the cost of his career.)
He waited until they were approaching her steps (which wasn't too long after) before answering.
"...Is this more about you wanting me to come or about you not wanting to be left under Ibiki's care?"
The long silence before he chose to answer was probably a good indication of his refusal. Or negative thinking on Tsurude's response, or out-and-out just not wanting to go. Which of course she couldn't blame him for. It probably wasn't even really right of her to want him to come, because seriously, it was just one more slap in the face, wasn't it? Making him be there was worse than just having him know it was happening. Maybe she shouldn't have suggested it in the first place... stupid selfishness.
".... both," Asuka admitted, a bit hesitantly. Not that she'd be able to get out of Ibiki's care even if Kureno did come, but...
In a way it was all rather flattering, Asuka actually willing to dig into her savings just for a chance at getting him to come with her. She was rather cheap by nature--no, more like she was simply easy to please and never sought anything expensive. She'd rather reserve her money for cigarettes than for a fancy home and clothes, and she'd take anything she could get for free just so she'd have the spare cash for beer. (Or more cigarettes as she often got beer free too, thanks to him.) His company being something she would pay for herself really meant something...
Something probably like, "You're pretty desperate, aren't you."
"Am not," she protested immediately. It wasn't like she'd die on this trip (though what remained of her pride was likely going to be chopped into itty bitty pieces and fed to the koi), or that anything terrible was going to happen (except for anything Ibiki might do to her while the door was closed), but it was.... not going to be fun. And his presence would help make up for the shit she was going to feeling like... after all, if he'd been managing to pull her out of bed to go on walks for these last few weeks, and been the one to cheer her up when it felt like there was no cheering up to be doing, he'd definitely make a difference at this stupid gala.
... but... at the same time, it wasn't really right for him to go. Not because he'd screwed up, not because Tsurude didn't want him to go, but because it was yet another slap in the face, a poke at his pride, all those things he didn't deserve. It didn't matter how much she wanted him to go or how well he might fit into something like this. It wasn't right to make him go through this, too.
Asuka mounted the steps to her porch, shaking out her keys and shaking her head at the same time. ".... nevermind," she amended after a moment, voice slipping towards something more tired. "I really shouldn't have asked."
Kureno wondered when it had become instinctive of him to comfort and assure her, so much so that he had to put forth effort into not telling her he didn't mind that she asked. Or that he was even a little glad she asked, and felt rather complimented by her wanting his company for support. He had to remember not to tell her that he did wish he could come, if only so she could feel more at ease, because no matter what the mean streak in him felt, he wasn't actually getting happiness out of her suffering (just some justice). And he had to stop himself from telling her that yes she should have asked, that she should always ask, that he wanted her to ask any time the question came into her mind. Just because he may not give her the answer she wanted, didn't mean he didn't want to hear what it was she wanted--especially if she wanted him.
...But that was all a little too much, and fell outside of the new boundaries he'd placed between himself and Asuka. So he didn't say anything about it and let her continue to think she was right to think she was wrong, and that he perhaps was in agreement in wishing she hadn't.
He watched wordlessly as she unlocked her door, leaning against the wall beside it and not moving to come in. "This is probably the last time I'll drop by before you have to head off. Keep exercising," Kureno said with a pointed look. "We'll see if you're not two blocks better by the time you get back."
This lack of response felt a lot easier to interpret - saying nothing because he agreed with her, but didn't want to come off as a jerk or make her feel bad. (He did that sometimes, except for when he was PMSing.) Asuka would prefer it if he actually did come out and agree with her, though; maybe then it would be a little easier to apologize. Not that she didn't already have enough to apologize for, but...
The kunoichi nodded as she pushed the door open. She would be better by the time they could go for another walk; Kureno seemed to enjoy her progress, so she'd make certain to keep working on it for him. No matter how frequently her motivation slipped. "As long as Ibiki doesn't take off my toes while I'm gone, I will be," she said with a forced smile (because even joking about Ibiki taking off her toes was a little scary). "I'll make sure to get a souvenir for you."
"If she does take them, your toes don't count." He had to grin at the face she made then, although with more sympathy than when this conversation had started. "Don't go out of your way. It may distract you from surviving long enough to come home, and that's the important part. ...Not that I'm looking forward to emptying my wallet when you finally get through one of our walks without dying, but..."
"Then next time don't make a promise you don't look forward to keeping," she shot back. Banter, that was easy; it was comfortable and normal and would leave things on a better note than the flop she'd made in asking him to come to the gala. "I want you willing, not whining. And anyway, with as long as it's been since I've had a drink, I'll probably pass out after the first beer, anyway."
"Oh good," he said with a roll of his eyes. "Because I've been wanting to make sure you can walk all the way back to your house this whole time just so I could carry you."
"It's the price you pay," came her serious response. "You can lead an Asuka to a bar, but you can't make her not drink."
"Tch, especially not when someone else is picking up the bill. ...Or when you've just been freed from Ibiki's presence...huh. I'd better start saving up now and tell the Birch to stock up."
Asuka laughed, unable to remain serious after a response like that. "Better go tell them now. The sooner you both start, the better."
Kureno grinned and pushed away from the wall, taking a step backwards on her porch. "Well I guess I should go do that then. Maybe shake my couch down for loose change." He paused to take a last look back. "Good luck."
And she gave him a smile for that last look back. "Thanks." Because really, she was going to need it. Between Ibiki, the people who'd been sending her gifts that she was going to have to actually meet, the Daimyo, and the general all around humiliation of this giant farce... she was going to need it.
At least she had coming home to Kureno to look forward to.