(no subject)
Wow...It's been almost a year since I've been on LJ.
2010 has not been a kind year. My Dad was diagnosed with lung cancer
in January, and he died May 19th. I'm still in shock.
My brother and I took turns alternately staying all night
while he was sick and taking care of him so Mom
could rest so she could care for him during the day.
But I still worked during the days. It's amazing what you can do,
how you can just keep going on when you need to.
It's been 5 months, but I still am not coping well, I cannot believe he's gone.
I go to the cemetary and look at his grave and head stone and it just doesn't connect.
But sometimes it hits me like a ton of bricks, and takes my breath away.
Usually at the strangest times.
I know I should be slowly healing, but I feel like I'm getting worse.
I keep thinking of people who lost parents when they were so much younger than I am
(I'm 52), it just seems incomprehensible to me. My Dad was such a dear friend
and I miss him so much.
2010 has not been a kind year. My Dad was diagnosed with lung cancer
in January, and he died May 19th. I'm still in shock.
My brother and I took turns alternately staying all night
while he was sick and taking care of him so Mom
could rest so she could care for him during the day.
But I still worked during the days. It's amazing what you can do,
how you can just keep going on when you need to.
It's been 5 months, but I still am not coping well, I cannot believe he's gone.
I go to the cemetary and look at his grave and head stone and it just doesn't connect.
But sometimes it hits me like a ton of bricks, and takes my breath away.
Usually at the strangest times.
I know I should be slowly healing, but I feel like I'm getting worse.
I keep thinking of people who lost parents when they were so much younger than I am
(I'm 52), it just seems incomprehensible to me. My Dad was such a dear friend
and I miss him so much.