(no subject)
i feel lost and unexplained. i dont even know where to start, and i hate that feeling, that feeling of just utter confusion. utter confusion about everything, about where i want to start, where i want it to end, and so on.
things are so different now, id like to believe, yet im so scared to, and i need a new journal to go along with that. someday soon, when i get home, i will get to that.
a lot more things i want to be different, that i hope will be different, because i just dont know how to deal if they arent. i know that may not make much sense, but it will later. i hope. i need to throw things away. literally and symbolically. i want to throw everything i own away and just start anew.
i feel like i want a new level of maturity or maybe understanding so i can be at peace, but i cant because im so naive about certain things in life, and so experienced in other aspects.
is this where i start?