Top Ten Tuesday
I've been meaning to start this for awhile now. I'm thinking the title of it is pretty self-explanatory. For this week's Top Ten, I looked at male characters. It was really hard to pick. The things I took into consideration: level of intrigue, character complexity, humor, story arcs, and whether or not they make me feel all good inside.
Top Ten Fictional Male Characters Ever Created
(In no particular order.)
1. Captain Malcolm "Mal" Reynolds
Firefly
Serenity
Why? Mal is a badass. He never hesitates to shoot first, he's not afraid to get hurt or take chances, he's smart and funny, is not afraid to stand up for what he believes in (kicking the Alliance in the ass), and bottom-line, nothing is more important to him than his crew, his "family". I think the most interesting thing about his character, what gives him depth, is his loss of faith. In the pilot of the show, he's shown in a flashback as wearing a cross and putting his trust in faith. Soon after, he loses that faith along with the war and his struggle throughout the entire show and movie afterwards is to find something to believe in, to fight for. It's some deep shit, man.
Quotes:
"I aim to misbehave. "
"This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then - explode. "
Mal: If anyone gets nosy, just, you know... shoot 'em.
Zoe: Shoot 'em?
Mal: Politely.
"Well, they tell ya, never hit a man with a closed fist, but it is on occasion hilarious."
"When you can't run anymore, you crawl, and when you can't do that, you find someone to carry you."
2. Smeagol aka Gollum
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the
Ring, The Two Towers, The Return of the King, J.R.R. Tolkien
Why? I remember the first time I read The Two Towers I got so excited when I came to the chapter "The Taming of Smeagol" that my heart started pounding and I had to get up out of the chair and run around. Gollum is fascinating, the perfect example of perverted innocence. And he's just so damn creepy. The books and the movies are very different when it comes to Gollum/Smeagol. The movies treat him almost as a split personality, which I guess is a good way to get the point across visually, but in the books it's more subtle. Regardless, with his shriveled up heart and relentless pursuit of his obsessions, Gollum/Smeagol is by far the most intriguing out of all the characters Tolkien ever created.
Quotes:
"What’s taters, Precious? What’s taters, eh?"
Frodo: You swore! You swore on the precious! Smeagol promised!
Gollum: Smeagol lied.
3. Logan Echolls
Veronica Mars
Why? As somebody coming from high school who severely despised the "popular" kids, Logan Echolls is a breath of fresh air. In the pilot Veronica says, "Logan Echolls. Every school has an obligatory psychotic jackass. He's ours." So how did he end up becoming my favorite character? Motives. Heartbreaking ones. The guy has had a horrible life, despite having a famous actor for a father, and a lot of bad things happen to him. How does he deal with it? Not very well, but at the same time, very realistically. He has faults and flaws and does really dumb things because you understand where he's coming from, you can see past that tough guy exterior. I don't even really know how to articulate how much I love this character. JUST WATCH THE SHOW.
Quotes:
"F.Y.I. If cuddling is the best part, he didn't do it right. "
"Annoy, tiny blonde one, annoy like the wind! "
Counselor: You know it sounds like you blame Veronica.
Logan: No, Veronica was my friend too. If she hadn't ratted me out, then Lilly and I would have stayed together. And Lilly wouldn't have been alone that day. I would have been there. So yeah I blame Veronica... and I blame myself for being stupid and I blame Lilly for being a bitch that week.
Counselor: You know there is another way of looking at this, Logan. If you'd still been together, then you'd have been dead too.
Logan: And what is so great about living?
"You have a problem with Veronica you leave. Actually you have a problem with Veronica, you're pretty much dead to me so just like evaporate or something, I don't know. That's kind of a general invitation. You don't like my girlfriend then just start heading towards the rectangle with the knob."
Van Clemmons: Mr. Echolls, I was wondering if I could have a word?
Logan: Anthropomorphic. All yours, big guy.
4. Captain Jack Sparrow
Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
Why? Do I really need to explain this one? Seriously. I really don't.
Quotes:
"Not just the Spanish Main, love. The entire ocean. The entire world. Wherever we want to go, we'll go. That's what a ship is, you know. It's not just a keel and a hull and a deck and sails, that's what a ship needs. But what a ship is... what the Black Pearl really is... is freedom."
"...and then they made me their chief."
"But why is the rum gone? "
Elizabeth: There will come a time when you'll have the chance to do something courageous, to do the right thing.
Jack: I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by.
"I am chief! Want big fire!"
"And to what do I owe the pleasure of your carbunkle? "
"Where is the thump-thump?"
5. Albus Dumbledore
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, J.K. Rowling
Why? He's the grandfather everybody wants, he's seriously powerful, he's a little bit mad, and seriously wise. When Dumbledore says something, you know it's true. I love him.
Quotes:
"It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live."
"After all, to the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure."
"At that moment, Harry fully understood for the first time why people said Dumbledore was the only wizard Voldemort had ever feared. The look upon Dumbledore's face as he stared down at the unconscious form of Mad-Eye Moody was more terrible than Harry could have ever imagined. There was no benign smile upon Dumbledore's face, no twinkle in the eyes behind the spectacles. There was cold fury in every line of the ancient face; a sense of power radiated from Dumbledore as though he were giving off burning heat. "
"You place too much importance, and you always have done, on the so-called purity of blood! You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow up to be!"
"We both know there are other ways of destroying a man, Tom." Dumbledore said calmly. "Merely taking your life would not satisfy me, I admit - "
"There is nothing worse than death, Dumbledore!" snarled Voldemort.
"You are quite wrong," said Dumbledore, still closing in upon Voldemort and speaking as lightly as though they were discussing the matter over drinks. Harry felt scared to see him walking along, undefended, shieldless. He wanted to cry out a warning, but his headless guard kept shunting him backward toward the wall, blocking his every attempt to get out from behind it. "Indeed your failure to understand that there are things much worse than death has always been your greatest weakness -"
"By all means continue destroying my possessions," said Dumbledore serenely. "I daresay I have too many."
"I cared about you too much," said Dumbledore simply. "I cared more for your happiness than your knowing the truth, more for your peace of mind than my plan, more for your life than the lives that might be lost if the plan failed. In other words, I acted exactly as Voldemort expects we fools who love to act."
"Is there a defense? I defy anyone who has watched you as I have - and I have watched you more closely than you can have imagined - not to want to save you more pain than you had already suffered. What did I care if numbers of nameless and faceless people and creatures were slaughtered in the vague future, if in the here and now you were alive, and well, and happy? I never dreamed that I would have such a person on my hands."
"And now, Harry, let us step out into the night and pursue that flighty temptress, adventure."
6. Mr. Darcy/Mark Darcy
Mr. Darcy....but which one!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen
Mark Darcy
Bridget Jones' Diary, Helen Fielding
Why? Mr. Darcy is amazing. Mr. Darcy is the world's most socially inept romantic. Mr. Darcy is awkward and horrible and I love it. Seriously, how genius of Jane Austen was it to make him so bad? He's like exactly the opposite of the traditional romantic hero. He's also dead sexy. And Mark Darcy was based off of Mr. Darcy, so they're basically the same character, even if Mark Darcy isn't as horrible as Mr. Darcy. But seriously, Matthew MacFadyen and Colin Firth...I know they have nothing to do with character but I don't even care.
Quotes:
Mr. Darcy
"I certainly have not the talent which some people possess," said Darcy, "of conversing easily with those I have never seen before. I cannot catch their tone of conversation, or appear interested in their concerns, as I often see done."
"In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you."
("I might as well inquire," replied she, "why with so evident a desire of offending and insulting me, you chose to tell me that you liked me against your will, against your reason, and even against your character?)
"You are too generous to trifle with me. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes are unchanged, but one word from you will silence me on this subject for ever."
Elizabeth Bennet: And I might as well enquire why, with so evident a design of insulting me, you chose to tell me that you liked me against your better judgment.
Mr. Darcy: Miss Elizabeth. I have struggled in vain and I can bear it no longer. These past months have been a torment. I came to Rosings with the single object of seeing you... I had to see you. I have fought against my better judgment, my family's expectations, the inferiority of your birth by rank and circumstance. All these things I am willing to put aside and ask you to end my agony.
Elizabeth: I don't understand.
Mr. Darcy: I love you.
Mr. Darcy: My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I will have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on.
Mark Darcy
"Mother, I do not need a blind date. Particularly not with some verbally incontinent spinster who drinks like a fish, smokes like a chimney and dresses like her mother."
Mark Darcy: I like you, very much.
Bridget: Ah, apart from the smoking and the drinking, the vulgar mother and... ah, the verbal diarrhea.
Mark Darcy: No, I like you very much. Just as you are.
Bridget: Wait a minute... nice boys don't kiss like that.
Mark: Oh, yes they fucking do.
7. Special Agent Fox Mulder
The X-Files
Why? Fox Mulder is a mystery, Fox Mulder is a believer, Fox Mulder is a fox. I think the thing that is most interesting about Mulder (besides the being dead-sexy part, not gonna lie) is his loyalty and devotion. Whether it's to the missing sister he lost so long ago, his belief against all odds and danger that there really is something "out there", and most importantly his unswerving devotion to his partner, Scully, even when she doesn't believe a word that he says. And come on, nine years without getting any...the man really had to be devoted for that. Well, actually, it was technically seven years, we just didn't know about until nine. Anyway, I'd pick Fox Mulder to save the world any day of the week.
Quotes:
"I do not gaze at Scully."
Man: Do you know of the ancient Chinese ritual of sucking your balls up into your ass?
Mulder: I'm doing it as we speak.
"I want to believe that... the dead are not lost to us. That they speak to us... as part of something greater than us - greater than any alien force. And if you and I are powerless now, I want to believe that if we listen, to what's speaking, it can give us the power to save ourselves."
"Dear Diary, today my heart leapt when Agent Scully suggested spontaneous human combustion."
Scully: I called him Ahab and he called me Starbuck. So I named my dog Queequeg. It's funny, I just realized something.
Mulder: It's a bizarre name for a dog, huh?
Scully: No. How much you're like Ahab. You're so... consumed by your personal vengeance against life, whether it be its inherent cruelties or its mysteries, that everything takes on a warped significance to your megalomaniacal cosmology.
Mulder: Scully, are you coming on to me?
"Scully, you have to believe me. Nobody else on this whole damn planet does or ever will. You're my one in five billion. "
[Mulder and Scully are posing as husband and wife] "Wow. Admit it, all you want to do is play house. Woman! Get back in here and make me a sandwich! "[Scully throws a rubber glove at his face] "Did I not make myself clear? "
"No one down here but the FBI's most unwanted. "
8. William Pratt aka "William the Bloody" aka "Spike"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Why? He came into the show a super-villain and left a beloved hero who saved the world. How's that for a 360? The beautiful thing about Spike is that nothing about his transformation from baddie to goodie was implausible. Well, besides the whole vampire thing, obviously. Spike is the antithesis of everything a villain should not be. A villain should have motives, a villain should have traits that we recognize in ourselves. A villain should be a person and not a cardboard cutout. And the thing about Spike is that he's intriguing in whatever role he's playing. Plus, he's freaking hilarious.
Quotes:
"This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed. "
"Oh, poor Watcher. Did your life pass before your eyes? Cup o' tea, cup o' tea, almost got shagged, cup o' tea. "
"She wouldn't even kill me. She just left. She didn't even care enough to cut off my head or set me on fire. I mean, is that too much to ask? You know, some little sign that she cared? I've been all wrongheaded about this. Weeping, crawling, blaming everybody else. I want Dru back, I just have to be the man I was. The man she loved. I'm gonna do what I should have done in the first place. I'll find her, wherever she is, and tie her up and torture her until she likes me again. Love's a funny thing."
"Oh, yeah, okay. Let me guess - you won't kill me? Ooh. The whole crowd-pleasing threats and swagger routine. Outstandingly original. You know, I'm just passing through. Satisfied? You know, I really hope so, because God knows you need some satisfaction in life besides shagging Captain Cardboard. And I never really liked you anyway. And you have stupid hair. "
"Uh... I do remember what I said. The promise. To protect her. If I had done that... even if I didn't make it... you wouldn't have had to jump. But I want you to know I did save you. Not when it counted, of course, but... after that. Every night after that. I'd see it all again... do something different. Faster or more clever, you know? Dozens of times, lots of different ways... Every night I save you."
Spike: You listen to me. I've been alive a bit longer than you, and dead a lot longer than that. I've seen things you couldn't imagine, and done things I'd prefer you didn't. I don't exactly have a reputation for being a thinker; I follow my blood, which does not always rush in the direction of my head. So I've made a lot of mistakes. A lot of wrong bloody calls. A hundred plus years, only one thing I've ever been sure of. You. Look at me. I'm not asking you for anything. When I tell you that I love you, it's not because I want you, or 'cause I can't have you, it has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try... I've seen your strength, and your kindness, I've seen the best and the worst of you and I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You are a hell of a woman. You're the one, Buffy.
Buffy: I don't... I don't want to be the one.
Spike: I don't want to be this good-looking and athletic. We all have crosses to bear.
9. Dwight K. Schrute
The Office
Why? Look at the face, read the quotes. There never has been nor will there every be another Dwight K. Schrute. I'm not really sure if that's a good or bad thing.
Quotes:
"It has to be official, and it has to be urine."
"Your pencils are creating a health hazard. I could fall and pierce an organ. "
"Would I ever leave this company? Look, I'm all about loyalty. In fact, I feel like part of what I'm being paid for here is my loyalty. But if there were somewhere else that valued loyalty more highly, I'm going wherever they value loyalty the most. "
"In the wild, there is no health care. In the wild, health care is, 'Ow, I hurt my leg. I can't run. A lion eats me and I'm dead.' Well, I'm not dead. I'm the lion, you're dead. "
"I can travel anywhere, except Cuba. And I will travel to New Zealand. And walk the Lord of the Rings trail to Mordor. And then I will hike Mount Doom."
"I.D. badges are long overdue. Security in this office park is a joke. Last year, I came to work with my spud gun in a duffel bag. I sat at my desk all day, with a rifle that shoots potatoes at 60 pounds per square inch. Can you imagine if I was deranged? "
10. James "Sawyer" Ford
Lost
Why? I hated Sawyer when I first started watching this show, he was loud, abrasive, offensive, and had a southern accent. Then he started showing some weaknesses. Then came the kiss between him and Kate and I was all "holy crap what did he just do with his mouth". And then you find out that when he was a kid his mother was conned by a confidence man into losing all their money so his dad killed her and then committed suicide. Right in front of him. Can you imagine what that would do to a kid? Well, you don't really have to imagine because Sawyer is what happened. He took on the name Sawyer, the name the confidence man had given his mother, out of guilt at becoming a confidence man himself. His self loathing runs so deep that he can't even stand to have other people like him. Anytime the other islanders start to like him, he does something completely assholic to push them away. That's why I love him and Kate together, she can see right through him because she's just as bad as he is. I can't wait to see where else the writers take this character.
Quotes:
"Baby, I am tied to a tree in a jungle of mystery."
Kate: The act. You try too hard, Sawyer. I ask you to help a woman who can't breathe, and you want me to kiss you? Nobody's that disgusting... I've seen you, ya know.
Sawyer: Seen me what?
Kate: With that piece of paper. The one you keep in your pocket. Seen the expression on your face when you read it. How carefully you fold it up. Means something to you. So you can play games all you want. But I know there's a human being in there somewhere. Give me the medication.
Kate: [reading Sawyer's letter] Dear Mr. Sawyer, you don't know who I am, but I know who you are and I know what you done. You had sex with my mother and then you stole my dad's money all away. So he got angry, and he killed my mother. And then he killed himself, too.
Sawyer: Don't stop now. You're getting to the good part.
Kate: [continuing to read the letter] All I know is your name, but one of these days, I'm gonna find you and I'm gonna give you this letter, so you remember what you done to me. You killed my parents, Mr. Sawyer.
Kate: (to Sawyer) What kind of person do I think you are? I don't think this has anything to do with guns or getting your stash back. I think you just want people to hate you.
Sawyer: You did all this just to, just to keep me in a damn cage?
Ben: We did all this because the only way to gain a con man's respect is to con him. And you're pretty good, Sawyer. We're a lot better. Funny thing is, us telling you about the pacemaker wasn't what kept you in line. It was when I threatened her. You work so hard to make her think you don't care -- that you don't need her, but, "A guy goes nuts if he ain't got nobody. It don't make no difference who the guy is, long as he's with you. I tell you, I tell you a guy gets too lonely and he gets sick."
Sawyer: What the hell are you talking about?
Ben: It's from Of Mice and Men. Don't you read? Come on, let's get you back to your cage.
Kate: (about Sawyer kissing her) What the hell were you thinking?
Sawyer: I couldn't help myself. You just looked so damn cute swinging that pick axe.
Kate: Why'd she call you James?
Sawyer: Because that's my name. I noticed something else, too. You taste like strawberries.
Kate: You taste like fish biscuits. So what do we do now?
Sawyer: Lemme ask you something, Freckles... Say Blockhead was beating on me, and you said "I love you"... that was just... to get him to stop, right? (Kate kisses him) ... I love you too.
**DONE! You would not BELIEVE how long that entry took me.
Top Ten Fictional Male Characters Ever Created
(In no particular order.)
1. Captain Malcolm "Mal" Reynolds
Firefly
Serenity
Why? Mal is a badass. He never hesitates to shoot first, he's not afraid to get hurt or take chances, he's smart and funny, is not afraid to stand up for what he believes in (kicking the Alliance in the ass), and bottom-line, nothing is more important to him than his crew, his "family". I think the most interesting thing about his character, what gives him depth, is his loss of faith. In the pilot of the show, he's shown in a flashback as wearing a cross and putting his trust in faith. Soon after, he loses that faith along with the war and his struggle throughout the entire show and movie afterwards is to find something to believe in, to fight for. It's some deep shit, man.
Quotes:
"I aim to misbehave. "
"This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then - explode. "
Mal: If anyone gets nosy, just, you know... shoot 'em.
Zoe: Shoot 'em?
Mal: Politely.
"Well, they tell ya, never hit a man with a closed fist, but it is on occasion hilarious."
"When you can't run anymore, you crawl, and when you can't do that, you find someone to carry you."
2. Smeagol aka Gollum
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the
Ring, The Two Towers, The Return of the King, J.R.R. Tolkien
Why? I remember the first time I read The Two Towers I got so excited when I came to the chapter "The Taming of Smeagol" that my heart started pounding and I had to get up out of the chair and run around. Gollum is fascinating, the perfect example of perverted innocence. And he's just so damn creepy. The books and the movies are very different when it comes to Gollum/Smeagol. The movies treat him almost as a split personality, which I guess is a good way to get the point across visually, but in the books it's more subtle. Regardless, with his shriveled up heart and relentless pursuit of his obsessions, Gollum/Smeagol is by far the most intriguing out of all the characters Tolkien ever created.
Quotes:
"What’s taters, Precious? What’s taters, eh?"
Frodo: You swore! You swore on the precious! Smeagol promised!
Gollum: Smeagol lied.
3. Logan Echolls
Veronica Mars
Why? As somebody coming from high school who severely despised the "popular" kids, Logan Echolls is a breath of fresh air. In the pilot Veronica says, "Logan Echolls. Every school has an obligatory psychotic jackass. He's ours." So how did he end up becoming my favorite character? Motives. Heartbreaking ones. The guy has had a horrible life, despite having a famous actor for a father, and a lot of bad things happen to him. How does he deal with it? Not very well, but at the same time, very realistically. He has faults and flaws and does really dumb things because you understand where he's coming from, you can see past that tough guy exterior. I don't even really know how to articulate how much I love this character. JUST WATCH THE SHOW.
Quotes:
"F.Y.I. If cuddling is the best part, he didn't do it right. "
"Annoy, tiny blonde one, annoy like the wind! "
Counselor: You know it sounds like you blame Veronica.
Logan: No, Veronica was my friend too. If she hadn't ratted me out, then Lilly and I would have stayed together. And Lilly wouldn't have been alone that day. I would have been there. So yeah I blame Veronica... and I blame myself for being stupid and I blame Lilly for being a bitch that week.
Counselor: You know there is another way of looking at this, Logan. If you'd still been together, then you'd have been dead too.
Logan: And what is so great about living?
"You have a problem with Veronica you leave. Actually you have a problem with Veronica, you're pretty much dead to me so just like evaporate or something, I don't know. That's kind of a general invitation. You don't like my girlfriend then just start heading towards the rectangle with the knob."
Van Clemmons: Mr. Echolls, I was wondering if I could have a word?
Logan: Anthropomorphic. All yours, big guy.
4. Captain Jack Sparrow
Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
Why? Do I really need to explain this one? Seriously. I really don't.
Quotes:
"Not just the Spanish Main, love. The entire ocean. The entire world. Wherever we want to go, we'll go. That's what a ship is, you know. It's not just a keel and a hull and a deck and sails, that's what a ship needs. But what a ship is... what the Black Pearl really is... is freedom."
"...and then they made me their chief."
"But why is the rum gone? "
Elizabeth: There will come a time when you'll have the chance to do something courageous, to do the right thing.
Jack: I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by.
"I am chief! Want big fire!"
"And to what do I owe the pleasure of your carbunkle? "
"Where is the thump-thump?"
5. Albus Dumbledore
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, J.K. Rowling
Why? He's the grandfather everybody wants, he's seriously powerful, he's a little bit mad, and seriously wise. When Dumbledore says something, you know it's true. I love him.
Quotes:
"It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live."
"After all, to the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure."
"At that moment, Harry fully understood for the first time why people said Dumbledore was the only wizard Voldemort had ever feared. The look upon Dumbledore's face as he stared down at the unconscious form of Mad-Eye Moody was more terrible than Harry could have ever imagined. There was no benign smile upon Dumbledore's face, no twinkle in the eyes behind the spectacles. There was cold fury in every line of the ancient face; a sense of power radiated from Dumbledore as though he were giving off burning heat. "
"You place too much importance, and you always have done, on the so-called purity of blood! You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow up to be!"
"We both know there are other ways of destroying a man, Tom." Dumbledore said calmly. "Merely taking your life would not satisfy me, I admit - "
"There is nothing worse than death, Dumbledore!" snarled Voldemort.
"You are quite wrong," said Dumbledore, still closing in upon Voldemort and speaking as lightly as though they were discussing the matter over drinks. Harry felt scared to see him walking along, undefended, shieldless. He wanted to cry out a warning, but his headless guard kept shunting him backward toward the wall, blocking his every attempt to get out from behind it. "Indeed your failure to understand that there are things much worse than death has always been your greatest weakness -"
"By all means continue destroying my possessions," said Dumbledore serenely. "I daresay I have too many."
"I cared about you too much," said Dumbledore simply. "I cared more for your happiness than your knowing the truth, more for your peace of mind than my plan, more for your life than the lives that might be lost if the plan failed. In other words, I acted exactly as Voldemort expects we fools who love to act."
"Is there a defense? I defy anyone who has watched you as I have - and I have watched you more closely than you can have imagined - not to want to save you more pain than you had already suffered. What did I care if numbers of nameless and faceless people and creatures were slaughtered in the vague future, if in the here and now you were alive, and well, and happy? I never dreamed that I would have such a person on my hands."
"And now, Harry, let us step out into the night and pursue that flighty temptress, adventure."
6. Mr. Darcy/Mark Darcy
Mr. Darcy....but which one!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen
Mark Darcy
Bridget Jones' Diary, Helen Fielding
Why? Mr. Darcy is amazing. Mr. Darcy is the world's most socially inept romantic. Mr. Darcy is awkward and horrible and I love it. Seriously, how genius of Jane Austen was it to make him so bad? He's like exactly the opposite of the traditional romantic hero. He's also dead sexy. And Mark Darcy was based off of Mr. Darcy, so they're basically the same character, even if Mark Darcy isn't as horrible as Mr. Darcy. But seriously, Matthew MacFadyen and Colin Firth...I know they have nothing to do with character but I don't even care.
Quotes:
Mr. Darcy
"I certainly have not the talent which some people possess," said Darcy, "of conversing easily with those I have never seen before. I cannot catch their tone of conversation, or appear interested in their concerns, as I often see done."
"In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you."
("I might as well inquire," replied she, "why with so evident a desire of offending and insulting me, you chose to tell me that you liked me against your will, against your reason, and even against your character?)
"You are too generous to trifle with me. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes are unchanged, but one word from you will silence me on this subject for ever."
Elizabeth Bennet: And I might as well enquire why, with so evident a design of insulting me, you chose to tell me that you liked me against your better judgment.
Mr. Darcy: Miss Elizabeth. I have struggled in vain and I can bear it no longer. These past months have been a torment. I came to Rosings with the single object of seeing you... I had to see you. I have fought against my better judgment, my family's expectations, the inferiority of your birth by rank and circumstance. All these things I am willing to put aside and ask you to end my agony.
Elizabeth: I don't understand.
Mr. Darcy: I love you.
Mr. Darcy: My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I will have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on.
Mark Darcy
"Mother, I do not need a blind date. Particularly not with some verbally incontinent spinster who drinks like a fish, smokes like a chimney and dresses like her mother."
Mark Darcy: I like you, very much.
Bridget: Ah, apart from the smoking and the drinking, the vulgar mother and... ah, the verbal diarrhea.
Mark Darcy: No, I like you very much. Just as you are.
Bridget: Wait a minute... nice boys don't kiss like that.
Mark: Oh, yes they fucking do.
7. Special Agent Fox Mulder
The X-Files
Why? Fox Mulder is a mystery, Fox Mulder is a believer, Fox Mulder is a fox. I think the thing that is most interesting about Mulder (besides the being dead-sexy part, not gonna lie) is his loyalty and devotion. Whether it's to the missing sister he lost so long ago, his belief against all odds and danger that there really is something "out there", and most importantly his unswerving devotion to his partner, Scully, even when she doesn't believe a word that he says. And come on, nine years without getting any...the man really had to be devoted for that. Well, actually, it was technically seven years, we just didn't know about until nine. Anyway, I'd pick Fox Mulder to save the world any day of the week.
Quotes:
"I do not gaze at Scully."
Man: Do you know of the ancient Chinese ritual of sucking your balls up into your ass?
Mulder: I'm doing it as we speak.
"I want to believe that... the dead are not lost to us. That they speak to us... as part of something greater than us - greater than any alien force. And if you and I are powerless now, I want to believe that if we listen, to what's speaking, it can give us the power to save ourselves."
"Dear Diary, today my heart leapt when Agent Scully suggested spontaneous human combustion."
Scully: I called him Ahab and he called me Starbuck. So I named my dog Queequeg. It's funny, I just realized something.
Mulder: It's a bizarre name for a dog, huh?
Scully: No. How much you're like Ahab. You're so... consumed by your personal vengeance against life, whether it be its inherent cruelties or its mysteries, that everything takes on a warped significance to your megalomaniacal cosmology.
Mulder: Scully, are you coming on to me?
"Scully, you have to believe me. Nobody else on this whole damn planet does or ever will. You're my one in five billion. "
[Mulder and Scully are posing as husband and wife] "Wow. Admit it, all you want to do is play house. Woman! Get back in here and make me a sandwich! "[Scully throws a rubber glove at his face] "Did I not make myself clear? "
"No one down here but the FBI's most unwanted. "
8. William Pratt aka "William the Bloody" aka "Spike"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Why? He came into the show a super-villain and left a beloved hero who saved the world. How's that for a 360? The beautiful thing about Spike is that nothing about his transformation from baddie to goodie was implausible. Well, besides the whole vampire thing, obviously. Spike is the antithesis of everything a villain should not be. A villain should have motives, a villain should have traits that we recognize in ourselves. A villain should be a person and not a cardboard cutout. And the thing about Spike is that he's intriguing in whatever role he's playing. Plus, he's freaking hilarious.
Quotes:
"This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed. "
"Oh, poor Watcher. Did your life pass before your eyes? Cup o' tea, cup o' tea, almost got shagged, cup o' tea. "
"She wouldn't even kill me. She just left. She didn't even care enough to cut off my head or set me on fire. I mean, is that too much to ask? You know, some little sign that she cared? I've been all wrongheaded about this. Weeping, crawling, blaming everybody else. I want Dru back, I just have to be the man I was. The man she loved. I'm gonna do what I should have done in the first place. I'll find her, wherever she is, and tie her up and torture her until she likes me again. Love's a funny thing."
"Oh, yeah, okay. Let me guess - you won't kill me? Ooh. The whole crowd-pleasing threats and swagger routine. Outstandingly original. You know, I'm just passing through. Satisfied? You know, I really hope so, because God knows you need some satisfaction in life besides shagging Captain Cardboard. And I never really liked you anyway. And you have stupid hair. "
"Uh... I do remember what I said. The promise. To protect her. If I had done that... even if I didn't make it... you wouldn't have had to jump. But I want you to know I did save you. Not when it counted, of course, but... after that. Every night after that. I'd see it all again... do something different. Faster or more clever, you know? Dozens of times, lots of different ways... Every night I save you."
Spike: You listen to me. I've been alive a bit longer than you, and dead a lot longer than that. I've seen things you couldn't imagine, and done things I'd prefer you didn't. I don't exactly have a reputation for being a thinker; I follow my blood, which does not always rush in the direction of my head. So I've made a lot of mistakes. A lot of wrong bloody calls. A hundred plus years, only one thing I've ever been sure of. You. Look at me. I'm not asking you for anything. When I tell you that I love you, it's not because I want you, or 'cause I can't have you, it has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try... I've seen your strength, and your kindness, I've seen the best and the worst of you and I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You are a hell of a woman. You're the one, Buffy.
Buffy: I don't... I don't want to be the one.
Spike: I don't want to be this good-looking and athletic. We all have crosses to bear.
9. Dwight K. Schrute
The Office
Why? Look at the face, read the quotes. There never has been nor will there every be another Dwight K. Schrute. I'm not really sure if that's a good or bad thing.
Quotes:
"It has to be official, and it has to be urine."
"Your pencils are creating a health hazard. I could fall and pierce an organ. "
"Would I ever leave this company? Look, I'm all about loyalty. In fact, I feel like part of what I'm being paid for here is my loyalty. But if there were somewhere else that valued loyalty more highly, I'm going wherever they value loyalty the most. "
"In the wild, there is no health care. In the wild, health care is, 'Ow, I hurt my leg. I can't run. A lion eats me and I'm dead.' Well, I'm not dead. I'm the lion, you're dead. "
"I can travel anywhere, except Cuba. And I will travel to New Zealand. And walk the Lord of the Rings trail to Mordor. And then I will hike Mount Doom."
"I.D. badges are long overdue. Security in this office park is a joke. Last year, I came to work with my spud gun in a duffel bag. I sat at my desk all day, with a rifle that shoots potatoes at 60 pounds per square inch. Can you imagine if I was deranged? "
10. James "Sawyer" Ford
Lost
Why? I hated Sawyer when I first started watching this show, he was loud, abrasive, offensive, and had a southern accent. Then he started showing some weaknesses. Then came the kiss between him and Kate and I was all "holy crap what did he just do with his mouth". And then you find out that when he was a kid his mother was conned by a confidence man into losing all their money so his dad killed her and then committed suicide. Right in front of him. Can you imagine what that would do to a kid? Well, you don't really have to imagine because Sawyer is what happened. He took on the name Sawyer, the name the confidence man had given his mother, out of guilt at becoming a confidence man himself. His self loathing runs so deep that he can't even stand to have other people like him. Anytime the other islanders start to like him, he does something completely assholic to push them away. That's why I love him and Kate together, she can see right through him because she's just as bad as he is. I can't wait to see where else the writers take this character.
Quotes:
"Baby, I am tied to a tree in a jungle of mystery."
Kate: The act. You try too hard, Sawyer. I ask you to help a woman who can't breathe, and you want me to kiss you? Nobody's that disgusting... I've seen you, ya know.
Sawyer: Seen me what?
Kate: With that piece of paper. The one you keep in your pocket. Seen the expression on your face when you read it. How carefully you fold it up. Means something to you. So you can play games all you want. But I know there's a human being in there somewhere. Give me the medication.
Kate: [reading Sawyer's letter] Dear Mr. Sawyer, you don't know who I am, but I know who you are and I know what you done. You had sex with my mother and then you stole my dad's money all away. So he got angry, and he killed my mother. And then he killed himself, too.
Sawyer: Don't stop now. You're getting to the good part.
Kate: [continuing to read the letter] All I know is your name, but one of these days, I'm gonna find you and I'm gonna give you this letter, so you remember what you done to me. You killed my parents, Mr. Sawyer.
Kate: (to Sawyer) What kind of person do I think you are? I don't think this has anything to do with guns or getting your stash back. I think you just want people to hate you.
Sawyer: You did all this just to, just to keep me in a damn cage?
Ben: We did all this because the only way to gain a con man's respect is to con him. And you're pretty good, Sawyer. We're a lot better. Funny thing is, us telling you about the pacemaker wasn't what kept you in line. It was when I threatened her. You work so hard to make her think you don't care -- that you don't need her, but, "A guy goes nuts if he ain't got nobody. It don't make no difference who the guy is, long as he's with you. I tell you, I tell you a guy gets too lonely and he gets sick."
Sawyer: What the hell are you talking about?
Ben: It's from Of Mice and Men. Don't you read? Come on, let's get you back to your cage.
Kate: (about Sawyer kissing her) What the hell were you thinking?
Sawyer: I couldn't help myself. You just looked so damn cute swinging that pick axe.
Kate: Why'd she call you James?
Sawyer: Because that's my name. I noticed something else, too. You taste like strawberries.
Kate: You taste like fish biscuits. So what do we do now?
Sawyer: Lemme ask you something, Freckles... Say Blockhead was beating on me, and you said "I love you"... that was just... to get him to stop, right? (Kate kisses him) ... I love you too.
**DONE! You would not BELIEVE how long that entry took me.