The One With The Bodies - A Silly Merlin RPF (Part 2)
Title: The One With The Bodies (Part 2)
Category: General (RPF)
Characters: Colin Morgan, Bradley James, Katie McGrath, Angel Coulby
Rating: R
Summary: This is the story of how Colin Morgan became Bradley James and how Bradley James became Colin Morgan
Author's Notes: I hardly write RPF, but this idea was in my head for months, so I've decided to give it a try. Dedicated to ungalad for her birthday. Happy birthday!! :)
Part 1
The One With The Bodies
Part 2
“You’re too easy, Merlin,” I said, for about the tenth time that afternoon, staring at myself making a funny face. It was like practicing your lines in front of the mirror, despite the fact that those lines weren’t mine.
Due to the body swap, that day Bradley was playing Merlin and I was playing Arthur. And you know what? Although I would never change my role in this series, I really enjoyed being the king.
“Stop making faces at me, Merlin!” I said after Declan yelled ‘cut!’ “And if you’re going to the tent, bring me some water!”
“But I’m not going to the tent!” Bradley objected.
“Then go there!” said I, trying to sound serious, but I couldn’t hide my grin.
I was sure he was making faces at me, just like I used to do when I had my own body. We were out in the forest to shoot the picnic scene from episode ten. I was glad for that, since I hadn’t had a lot of scenes with Angel lately. In most of the ones we had shot for the new season, we were in the same room, but there was hardly any conversation between us. I heard her laughter behind my back as I sent Bradley for water.
“You’re evil,” she teased me.
“He was doing this to me for four and a half year!” I defended myself. “He deserves it!”
Of course, Bradley had a different opinion on that: He didn’t agree with me that he deserved this kind of treatment while playing my manservant. So, as a revenge, during the breaks, he started hitting on Janice, one of the assistant directors. She’s a nice girl, but she’s just not my type. Singing As Long As You Love Me to her was far too much. Especially in my voice. Moreover, I couldn’t get that song out of my head for the rest of the day!
The body swap made me think of things that I would hardly had thought about(and I don’t mean As Long As You Love Me!):
“If two people who swapped bodies kiss, what do you think who kisses who?” I asked Bradley as we sat down for dinner. We changed trays, just like at the morning - again, the daily routine. And again, I have to offer a steak to a hungry volunteer, I thought, with my eyes searching for our knights: I was sure they would be glad for some extra meat.
“How do you get these ideas?” Bradley asked with his eyes widened and his face went pale, then he slightly blushed.
Did he think I had meant us? It could be anybody who had ever swapped bodies!
“I didn’t mean anyone in particular,” I explained myself, while I felt my ears going a little red. I was curious about his opinion on this, so I didn’t give up. Led by a sudden instinct, I took my fork and knife to demonstrate the whole thing. “Let’s say Knife and Fork swapped bodies, and Knife wants to kiss Fork. But since Knife is in Fork’s body, and kissing is a physical thing, isn’t it Fork kissing Knife?”
Bradley’s eyes widened even more and he glanced at my knife, then at my fork, then at me.
“I don’t think I want to know how this came to your mind,” he said. “But are you sure that kissing is merely physical?” he asked. “I mean, the act of kissing is physical, but normally there’s a mental reason you kiss someone, isn’t it? You know, a feeling behind it, or something.”
“Yes, it is!” I agreed. “There’s a reason! But in this case with the body swap the two are sort of separated. I mean, my mind is in your body and yours is in mine. So, now if I wanted to kiss you should I kiss myself? I mean, Knife and Fork, you know...” I started stammering, while he was slowly shaking his head.
I was just giving a bloody example! I had no intention to kiss him! Especially not while he was in my body! It would be like kissing myself, wouldn’t it?
“I think I’m too tired for Philosophy right now,” Bradley said.
“I’m so sorry,” said I, still not giving up, because I was very curious about this topic, “but imagine...”
That was the moment when Katie arrived, slamming her tray next to mine.
“There’s nothing in the library about body swaps,” she told us, tired and annoyed by this fact. “Not even on Google. I’ve found some lovely fanfictions, but that’s all. The one with Han Solo and Leia was absolutely amazing, although it couldn’t solve your problem.”
“Thank God, Katie,” Bradley sighed as he noticed her joining us. We both raised our eyebrows hearing that, because he sounded like he didn’t want to get his body back. “Er... I mean, thank God for coming,” he explained, seeing our surprised faces. “Colin was killing me with Philosophy.”
It wasn’t THAT bad, Bradley!
“Speaking of which, Katie,” said I, because I wondered what she was thinking about the whole thing, “imagine that Knife and Fork swapped bodies and Knife wants to kiss Fork, but since he’s in Fork’s body isn’t it Fork kissing Knife instead?” I asked.
Katie needed a few moments to process the information, but then she shook her head a little.
“If Knife kisses Fork and Fork agrees, it will be a mutual thing, so it doesn’t matter who kissed who,” she said. “They are kissing each other, so it’s not important who is in whose body.”
Yes, great point, but what if Fork doesn’t agree? I wanted to ask, but Bradley was faster:
“So, Katie, what did you find in the library?” he asked.
“Nothing, absolutely nothing!” she cried out. “At least nothing useful. I guess we don’t have the guts of a whale, do we?”
What? The guts of a whale? We exchanged looks with Bradley then both shook our heads. “I don’t think so,” he said.
“What shall we do then?” I asked with a deep sigh.
Bradley shrugged his shoulder. “Ask the dragon,” he said.
I can’t believe that he has just made a joke! What if we get trapped in each other’s body forever?
“The dragon?” I raised a brow. “But it’s impossible!”
I couldn’t just call John Hurt telling him that I needed help, because we had swapped bodies with Bradley and we had no idea how to change it back. His first question would be what the hell we were smoking here in France.
However, the next thing I remember was Kilgharrah the dragon landing in a clearing near the castle, and I was feeling awkward, because calling him in Bradley’s voice had been more than weird.
“Your voice has changed, young warlock,” he said, looking at Bradley, who was staring back at him with eyes widened of astonishment. I could understand him completely, since on the computer screen the dragon didn’t look so huge.
“Actually, it’s not me,” Bradley shook his head and made a gesture towards me: “It’s him.”
I waved at Kilgharrah with an awkward smile. Now he was the one to be surprised, but it only lasted for a moment and he suddenly burst out laughing. He was even rolling on the ground!
“Excuse me,” he said when he pulled himself together. “I haven’t heard such a funny story in the last thousand years,” he told us. “So, you swapped bodies?”
“Yes, we did,” said I. “I woke up as Bradley this morning! It was quite shocking.”
“Not more shocking than realising that at night I turned into a pastry Irish boy,” Bradley said. A boy? Really, Bradley?
“So you want me to help you to get your bodies back,” Kilgharrah concluded before we could have started to argue.
“Yes, please,” said I and Bradley nodded his head.
The dragon let out a little laugh and he looked like he was smiling(I’m not sure whether these giant reptiles can do such thing) that made my stomach flinch a little. You know, when you get a funny feeling that something is not alright here.
“There’s a spell that could work,” the dragon said, “but for that you must unite in the most intimate position of...”
I couldn’t hear of what, because my head started spinning right at the moment when I heard the words: ‘the most intimate position.’ What the hell is that?
When my head stopped spinning, I found myself in a hotel room, lying on the bed, surrounded by popcorn. Had I fallen asleep? I lifted a hand to see if I was still in Bradley’s body and sighed with relief when I discovered that I had got mine back.
“Thank God,” I breathed with a wide grin. It felt so good to have myself back!
“Why are you so happy?” I heard Bradley’s voice. “We lost the match.”
“What?” I asked as I sat up.
Bradley was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking quite troubled, while on the TV screen people were discussing the football match that had just ended. Picking up the pieces, I slowly realised that the whole body swap was a dream. It all seemed so absurd, especially when the dragon had come, yet, to be honest, it felt so real somehow.
“I had the weirdest dream ever,” I said after getting up and stretching my muscles. Oh yes, my muscles. Not his, but mine!
“The punishment for sleeping during our national team’s match,” Bradley said as he got up, too and headed towards the bathroom.
I stayed where I was, staring at the telly to find out the results of the match against Portugal’s national team, but I was snapped out of my thoughts when I heard Bradley humming and singing a song:
“...Where you're from
What you did
As long as you love me...”
Unbelievable! Was he singing this while I was sleeping? I went after him and stood in the bathroom door. Noticing me in the mirror, he stopped singing and turned to me.
“What?” he asked.
“If two people who swapped bodies kiss, what do you think who kisses who?”
Category: General (RPF)
Characters: Colin Morgan, Bradley James, Katie McGrath, Angel Coulby
Rating: R
Summary: This is the story of how Colin Morgan became Bradley James and how Bradley James became Colin Morgan
Author's Notes: I hardly write RPF, but this idea was in my head for months, so I've decided to give it a try. Dedicated to ungalad for her birthday. Happy birthday!! :)
Part 1
The One With The Bodies
Part 2
“You’re too easy, Merlin,” I said, for about the tenth time that afternoon, staring at myself making a funny face. It was like practicing your lines in front of the mirror, despite the fact that those lines weren’t mine.
Due to the body swap, that day Bradley was playing Merlin and I was playing Arthur. And you know what? Although I would never change my role in this series, I really enjoyed being the king.
“Stop making faces at me, Merlin!” I said after Declan yelled ‘cut!’ “And if you’re going to the tent, bring me some water!”
“But I’m not going to the tent!” Bradley objected.
“Then go there!” said I, trying to sound serious, but I couldn’t hide my grin.
I was sure he was making faces at me, just like I used to do when I had my own body. We were out in the forest to shoot the picnic scene from episode ten. I was glad for that, since I hadn’t had a lot of scenes with Angel lately. In most of the ones we had shot for the new season, we were in the same room, but there was hardly any conversation between us. I heard her laughter behind my back as I sent Bradley for water.
“You’re evil,” she teased me.
“He was doing this to me for four and a half year!” I defended myself. “He deserves it!”
Of course, Bradley had a different opinion on that: He didn’t agree with me that he deserved this kind of treatment while playing my manservant. So, as a revenge, during the breaks, he started hitting on Janice, one of the assistant directors. She’s a nice girl, but she’s just not my type. Singing As Long As You Love Me to her was far too much. Especially in my voice. Moreover, I couldn’t get that song out of my head for the rest of the day!
The body swap made me think of things that I would hardly had thought about(and I don’t mean As Long As You Love Me!):
“If two people who swapped bodies kiss, what do you think who kisses who?” I asked Bradley as we sat down for dinner. We changed trays, just like at the morning - again, the daily routine. And again, I have to offer a steak to a hungry volunteer, I thought, with my eyes searching for our knights: I was sure they would be glad for some extra meat.
“How do you get these ideas?” Bradley asked with his eyes widened and his face went pale, then he slightly blushed.
Did he think I had meant us? It could be anybody who had ever swapped bodies!
“I didn’t mean anyone in particular,” I explained myself, while I felt my ears going a little red. I was curious about his opinion on this, so I didn’t give up. Led by a sudden instinct, I took my fork and knife to demonstrate the whole thing. “Let’s say Knife and Fork swapped bodies, and Knife wants to kiss Fork. But since Knife is in Fork’s body, and kissing is a physical thing, isn’t it Fork kissing Knife?”
Bradley’s eyes widened even more and he glanced at my knife, then at my fork, then at me.
“I don’t think I want to know how this came to your mind,” he said. “But are you sure that kissing is merely physical?” he asked. “I mean, the act of kissing is physical, but normally there’s a mental reason you kiss someone, isn’t it? You know, a feeling behind it, or something.”
“Yes, it is!” I agreed. “There’s a reason! But in this case with the body swap the two are sort of separated. I mean, my mind is in your body and yours is in mine. So, now if I wanted to kiss you should I kiss myself? I mean, Knife and Fork, you know...” I started stammering, while he was slowly shaking his head.
I was just giving a bloody example! I had no intention to kiss him! Especially not while he was in my body! It would be like kissing myself, wouldn’t it?
“I think I’m too tired for Philosophy right now,” Bradley said.
“I’m so sorry,” said I, still not giving up, because I was very curious about this topic, “but imagine...”
That was the moment when Katie arrived, slamming her tray next to mine.
“There’s nothing in the library about body swaps,” she told us, tired and annoyed by this fact. “Not even on Google. I’ve found some lovely fanfictions, but that’s all. The one with Han Solo and Leia was absolutely amazing, although it couldn’t solve your problem.”
“Thank God, Katie,” Bradley sighed as he noticed her joining us. We both raised our eyebrows hearing that, because he sounded like he didn’t want to get his body back. “Er... I mean, thank God for coming,” he explained, seeing our surprised faces. “Colin was killing me with Philosophy.”
It wasn’t THAT bad, Bradley!
“Speaking of which, Katie,” said I, because I wondered what she was thinking about the whole thing, “imagine that Knife and Fork swapped bodies and Knife wants to kiss Fork, but since he’s in Fork’s body isn’t it Fork kissing Knife instead?” I asked.
Katie needed a few moments to process the information, but then she shook her head a little.
“If Knife kisses Fork and Fork agrees, it will be a mutual thing, so it doesn’t matter who kissed who,” she said. “They are kissing each other, so it’s not important who is in whose body.”
Yes, great point, but what if Fork doesn’t agree? I wanted to ask, but Bradley was faster:
“So, Katie, what did you find in the library?” he asked.
“Nothing, absolutely nothing!” she cried out. “At least nothing useful. I guess we don’t have the guts of a whale, do we?”
What? The guts of a whale? We exchanged looks with Bradley then both shook our heads. “I don’t think so,” he said.
“What shall we do then?” I asked with a deep sigh.
Bradley shrugged his shoulder. “Ask the dragon,” he said.
I can’t believe that he has just made a joke! What if we get trapped in each other’s body forever?
“The dragon?” I raised a brow. “But it’s impossible!”
I couldn’t just call John Hurt telling him that I needed help, because we had swapped bodies with Bradley and we had no idea how to change it back. His first question would be what the hell we were smoking here in France.
However, the next thing I remember was Kilgharrah the dragon landing in a clearing near the castle, and I was feeling awkward, because calling him in Bradley’s voice had been more than weird.
“Your voice has changed, young warlock,” he said, looking at Bradley, who was staring back at him with eyes widened of astonishment. I could understand him completely, since on the computer screen the dragon didn’t look so huge.
“Actually, it’s not me,” Bradley shook his head and made a gesture towards me: “It’s him.”
I waved at Kilgharrah with an awkward smile. Now he was the one to be surprised, but it only lasted for a moment and he suddenly burst out laughing. He was even rolling on the ground!
“Excuse me,” he said when he pulled himself together. “I haven’t heard such a funny story in the last thousand years,” he told us. “So, you swapped bodies?”
“Yes, we did,” said I. “I woke up as Bradley this morning! It was quite shocking.”
“Not more shocking than realising that at night I turned into a pastry Irish boy,” Bradley said. A boy? Really, Bradley?
“So you want me to help you to get your bodies back,” Kilgharrah concluded before we could have started to argue.
“Yes, please,” said I and Bradley nodded his head.
The dragon let out a little laugh and he looked like he was smiling(I’m not sure whether these giant reptiles can do such thing) that made my stomach flinch a little. You know, when you get a funny feeling that something is not alright here.
“There’s a spell that could work,” the dragon said, “but for that you must unite in the most intimate position of...”
I couldn’t hear of what, because my head started spinning right at the moment when I heard the words: ‘the most intimate position.’ What the hell is that?
When my head stopped spinning, I found myself in a hotel room, lying on the bed, surrounded by popcorn. Had I fallen asleep? I lifted a hand to see if I was still in Bradley’s body and sighed with relief when I discovered that I had got mine back.
“Thank God,” I breathed with a wide grin. It felt so good to have myself back!
“Why are you so happy?” I heard Bradley’s voice. “We lost the match.”
“What?” I asked as I sat up.
Bradley was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking quite troubled, while on the TV screen people were discussing the football match that had just ended. Picking up the pieces, I slowly realised that the whole body swap was a dream. It all seemed so absurd, especially when the dragon had come, yet, to be honest, it felt so real somehow.
“I had the weirdest dream ever,” I said after getting up and stretching my muscles. Oh yes, my muscles. Not his, but mine!
“The punishment for sleeping during our national team’s match,” Bradley said as he got up, too and headed towards the bathroom.
I stayed where I was, staring at the telly to find out the results of the match against Portugal’s national team, but I was snapped out of my thoughts when I heard Bradley humming and singing a song:
“...Where you're from
What you did
As long as you love me...”
Unbelievable! Was he singing this while I was sleeping? I went after him and stood in the bathroom door. Noticing me in the mirror, he stopped singing and turned to me.
“What?” he asked.
“If two people who swapped bodies kiss, what do you think who kisses who?”