I think that nothing can fly with this broken wing.
but yeah kate had wrist surgery today but i talked to her and it sounds like she'll ok which is good! :-) but yeah only time today it seemed like someone realy wanted to talk to me was when jason just magically appears and starts talking about random shit and i'll feel slightly better... weird but very sweet...
********************
ok i know i'll end up posting later but i really need to get this up for some people right now and jason i'm here for you i swear for anything
********************
so i've just now noticed how much I've been neglecting things... for one thing... Jason I know I haven't mentained you lately and I'm sorry I've been trying not to upset people but... I'm deciding this now I'm not going to censor myself or my life just to try to keep people happy anymore.. if you've got a problem with me all well...
********************
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JASON!!! yay lol wow ok maybe i should sleep...
********************
Naquada
Hey Deanna,
I know your really mad at me right now, but I really am sorry I didn't make it to the party. I was telling Kate last night maybe me you chis and her can all get together on a Saturday or Sunday. I also remembered that I have a vacation day reserved for choir camp, I still don't know when it is but maybe we can do something that day too.
I hope you can forgive me.....
unseenblackhole
jason i do believe kate told you she's busy the rest of the summer... and i'm still incredibly angry at you....
naquada
Are you busy the rest of the summer?
unseenblackhole
it's possible.... and i doubt the rents would let me hang out with you so don't bother....
********************
i think i'm taking jason home then i'm going to be like rushing home cause mrs. hammand is going to be calling about the job...
********************
there was about 10 minutes left to class so Doc told us to put our folders away... jason comes up behind me "one... two... three strikes you're dead at the old folks home" i about burst out in tears right there... then he kept telling me to smile... sorry how am i supposed to do that after you say that... i know he din't mean anything by it but i mean come on jason have some brains... so yeah i don't know just everything reminds me of my grandma...
********************
but yeah i got out of 5th period today to go help jason set up the pzm mic...that was intresting... had to run back to the auditorium like 4 or 5 times... cause welch took the battery out and jason didn't think of that till he couldn't find anything else wrong... so yeah deffinatly intresting...
********************
naquada
*Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug*
Re: *Hugs*
unseenblackhole
2004-10-04 06:30 pm UTC (link) (Parent)
thanks jason but they're a lot better in person...
********************
so yeah its cold down here and i seem to be washing all my sweatshirts... so i got smart and listened to jason and went to get a blanket from upstairs...
********************
what if i did.... hehe actually when i did it the first time i only got candy from two people jason and amy... from who i picked... so i wanted to see if it was possible and then i was like holy cow...
********************
hey jason, i can't promise i'll even be on tonight i feel like some serious crap... and i really shouldn't even be doing this right now... but i don't know i felt horrible not giving you that hug after school... but yeah you and i will have the weekend to talk if nothing else... don't foget to call ellen and remind her to pick you up... see you in the morning hun...
********************
so yeah after school... kate and i went over to the middle school... jeen and jason went over too...
********************
i have play practice till 6 then i was supposed to go to jasons for dinner, and to figure stuff out for the play and such and such...
********************
i ended up driving jason and kate home... that was intresting...
********************
I brought the script home and I'm pretty sure I figured out who's mic is going to be on when and such, hope it works tomorrow... yeah Jason sorry I got so ticked at practice, I just felt like crap, and my wrist really hurt but yet I was still using it
********************
oh yeah last night i went over to jasons after play practice we ended up sitting around watching um i think one episode of family guy, made him turn the dvd off, watched like 3 shows of CSI, yeah that was fun... I think i feel asleep for a few minutes during one of them, I was like whoa did I fall asleep... figured out all the mic stuff and such, hope we have it almost perfect on monday and such
********************
get to tear down the risers after it too... oh yeah jasona nd I put them up during our 4th period exam... fun stuff...
********************
Jason-- you've been there for me since the begining of my freshman year, whenever I just needed to talk, or get my mind of things, or I just felt like complaining... thanks for being there and for everything... You are so good to me, I'm still not sure I deserve you as a friend, or anything else... oh and thanks for my early dinner today... I love you're mom, she is so sweet, you're lucky to have her.
********************
so yeah... Jason is coming over tomorrow after my in-car and wednesday kate russ, jason and I are going to zoo lights
********************
Jason will be here soon, but until then I'm going to go watch Breighton
********************
today during lunch Jeff found out the fire curtain had dropped when the power went down so he asked jason to come help him, I went with them because I thought it would provide some amusement... I found out that jason can do some very dumb things... I still can't believe he stood up there on the weights... I swear if Jeff had let go of the rope he would have gone flying and gotten his brains splattered all over... I'm going to drop it now...
********************
kate called and told me to look at the livejournal posts... i knew that dan had said something to jason because he was getting really upset with him... i don't blame him i guess... all in all it ended up being a big mess... oh and jen and jason i still have those comments you made to my journal... i'll be putting them back up so i won't forget what ya'll think bout me and dan and life in general for me...
********************
hmmm why do i get the feeling someone got into me e-mail and deleted jason's comment he made earlier... so that one won't be here... i guess someone really didn't want me to put that back up here...
********************
jason is being all depressing again... so yeah i just had a conversation with him without talking...jason is being all depressing again... so yeah i just had a conversation with him without talking... i finished my outline and bib cards... but i didn't do my rough draft... i burned my thumb last night it sucks... it's all like ow... so yeah tonight you know after this whole school thing is done... hang on hang on... jason was just called a backstreet boy... ok now back to what i wa saying...
********************
hey i'm not really sure whats been going on lately with you but i was really hurt today when you just kind of ignored me... i mean i'm really going to miss you... and it just feels like you've already said goodbye and left... i mean i know you're really ticked at me or something but i just wish you would have included me in what seems like the last time i'll ever see you at school...
********************
********************
********************
Hey Deanna its 11:52pm, I can't stay up any longer im beat, so I thought I would leave you a message. As far as I know im at a complete go for 2morrow. Bob was thinking around 3pm showing up hes going to call me at 11am to give me a for sure answer.
I missed you today, can't wait to see you 2morrow. Buches of *Hugs*
Night
********************
Deanna broke up with Aaron last night, twice. Yeah he didn't even grasp it the first time. The second time when it was well, clarified to him, I was standing right there. I felt like shit. It was not how I wanted it to go down. I guess it was the only way, and well it probably would of been worse had Deanna waited any longer. I have not had a chance to talk to Deanna yet, she’s going to be gone most of the day today. Going by her post last night she’s in a terrible mood. We obviously can't get together right away. Going by the fact that Aaron is kind of oblivious he probably has no idea Deanna and I like each other.
********************
xReMMuRdbMuDx (10:25:43 PM): jason...just give her a little time...i know she'll go for you
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Auto response from JSun Campanella (10:25:43 PM): just please don't make me feel any worse than I already am
http://www.livejournal.com/users/naquada
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xReMMuRdbMuDx (10:25:52 PM): if you really like her than just wait it out
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Session concluded at 10:40:17 PM
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xReMMuRdbMuDx (3:43:55 PM): hey...you know deanna and aaron are back together...right?
JSun Campanella (3:53:48 PM): what?
xReMMuRdbMuDx (4:05:53 PM): deanna and aaron are back together
xReMMuRdbMuDx (4:06:00 PM): it happened this morning...and i guess your slow at finding things out
xReMMuRdbMuDx (4:08:37 PM): you knew that though...right?
xReMMuRdbMuDx is away at 5:16:26 PM.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Session concluded at 5:36:14 PM
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Now I guess I know how Aaron felt on Saturday
********************
Wow *Yawn* Its really late! Well for the most part homework is done. I still need to add a little more to my book project but nothing to much. I am going to get some sleep, you better be alseep by now. My Deanna needs to get better so she can sing tomorrow! *Majorly Big Hug* Night! Miss You!
********************
Good Morning My Deanna!
So yeah the presentation has gone back and forth more times than I can remember :( I think we are finally both out of ideas so as soon as Emily sends this next copy I am loading it on the presenter. I really hoped you would be on before I left. Kate signed on 20mins ago shes still doing hw too. I can't wait to see you in a few hours. *Glomps* *Hugs* *Huggles* and *Smuggles* Night my Deanna!
********************
<3 My Deanna!
Took foreverish for my mom to get off the phone. I don't know where you are :( I thought for sure you would be here. I really didn't want to hear the bell either. 4th period was just amazing (minus janitors and doors) I wanted to spend the rest of the day there. I think the minute I layed down I was imagining being there again. I woke up cuddled up to all the pillows and was depressed it wasn't you. I am glad you were home so I could talk to you. I hope your online soon.
********************
Withdrawals from my Deanna.
I thought you said you were just kidding............
********************
Hey Sweetheart
Ok my mom wanted to update the calendar today. She marked Thursday for Haunted High/Revere Players. She marked this friday for the football game. She put a big Deanna on next Friday, so you need to find out if its ok or not that your comming over (ok or not your comming, its marked in the calendar and can't be erased ^_^ ) Also she marked next Saturday for the bonfire. (not to be mean but I hope Kate won't be home yet Saturday) I didn't have her mark County, We will already be after school till six and you might not even be here. My mom also said I could pay our dues for prom if I wanted to. I think ill wait till after your b-day for that. I think I have a plan for tomorrow, if Jeff wants to be in the booth I will ask him to let us stay for the first assembly and he can do the one at the end of the day. Since Kate is going to be at the end of the day one I don't think it would be a good idea anyways..........
I really miss you and I am going to try to get back on later. Things are a little wierd over here right now..............
********************
Someone please help me Deanna means everything to me, I don't know how to fix this.
********************
Morning Deanna
I didn't post before you left this morning, I tried to stay up but my dad was wandering downstairs so I ended up falling asleep waiting for him to go back to his room. Hope all goes well with the bloodwork sweetheart, ill talk to you when you get home.
********************
Good Morning Deanna!
UnSeEnBlAcKhOlE (12:02:16 AM): uh huh dream on lover boy
Um wow that really didn't seem like you at all. I hope it wasn't because of my joke.....
Just three more days Sweetheart!!!!
Your going to do wonderful today!
I miss you!
Update 1:12am Yay I made a Livejournal icon for My Deanna! ^_^
********************
Well ive decided im just going to take Deanna to the auditorium before we got to the pizza party. Shes really sad your not here I home asking her out will make her a little more cheerful. Hope you get better pink!
*Pink Hugs*
********************
My Deanna is offically My Deanna!!!!!
I am so happy/excited I can't wait to see you tomorrow!!!!!!
*hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps*
ummmmm *glomps* lol
********************
So what do you think for Deanna??
********************
Deanna, I hope you get better!!!!!!
********************
Deanna, get better hun, sry I kinda suck at making you feel better!!!!!! *GLOMPS**GLOMPS**GLOMPS*
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Deanna, are you betterish yet???
********************
Deanna called and shes comming over tomorrow/today after work!!! I am super happy and excited ^_^ I am going to get to bed now so I wake up at a decent time, well maybe get up at a decent time ^_^
********************
So yay I got to see Deanna today/yesterday. We watched a movie and some TV.
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I Love You Deanna
Happy New Year Hun! *hugs* *kiss*
********************
14. happiest moment?: Deanna and I finally being official (one month is tomorrow ^_^)
15. how was your birthday?: Proably the best ever since it was actually acknowledged (Thanks Deanna, Jenn W, Kate, and Lily)
10 Things You Will Never Forget:
[5] Finding out Deanna likes me
9 Things You Regret
[1]Yelling at Deanna
[4]Making Deanna feel bad
[6]Not calling Deanna over the summer
[7]Not asking Deanna to Homecomming
[8]Not asking Deanna over for New Years Eve
6 Things I Bought:
[2] Stuffed Bears (For Kate and Deanna)
[3] Necklace (For Deanna)
********************
unseenblackhole
2005-01-17 02:49 pm UTC (link)
jason...
naquada
2005-01-17 05:27 pm UTC (link) (Parent)
deanna...
what?
unseenblackhole
2005-01-17 07:25 pm UTC (link) (Parent)
chill out, seriously...
naquada
2005-01-17 08:46 pm UTC (link) (Parent)
Easy for you to say, you got what you wanted....
Im the one who didn't want to be alone......
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B is for bestfriends: Deanna, Kate, and Jenn
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Im so gald that not only did the fuckers once again harrass me about Deanna today, I find out on my way out from the same fuckers that Deanna was talking about how much I suck at singing after choir. I was fucking terrified today running though the song three fucking times. Now I know that not only did she not care enough to give me the hug she said she was going to give me but that she was talking about me behind my back. Well now I know why she went quiet when she saw me after class. You know what? Im dropping out of the ensemble. They have three tenors anyways, but I guess the only reason there was three tenors was becasue I suck so much......
********************
THREE THINGS/PEOPLE THAT MAKE ME HAPPY:
01 | Deanna
----------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS/PEOPLE THAT MAKE ME CRY:
01 | Deanna
-----------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS/PEOPLE I LOVE:
01 | Deanna
THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:
01 | Get Deanna Back
THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
01 | Fix things with Deanna
********************
Damn my nose started bleeding again. No I didn't watch the game. Deanna talked to me for a bit and helped me make a new cd. Made me feel better. Oh course I still can't get over the fact that she broke up with me. I anger myself to unknown extremes with stuff like that. I really need to grip reality somehow. Why can't I just let go? It sounds easy but I just can't. She still means everything to me.
********************
My life is ripping it's self apart. Kate and Deanna were completely pissed at me.
********************
Deanna was deffinatly the only thing really preventing me from crying.
********************
When it came time to leave Deanna steped out with me.
********************
I really think Deanna still likes me.
********************
I realized I miss Deanna more than I thought I did.
********************
I deffinaltly thankful that Deanna took care of me this afternoon.
********************
Deanna called while we were playing and she was going to possibly come back to kates for dinner.
********************
Ok so I was told I had to nap by Kate and Deanna.....
********************
Deanna Lynne Schneck is the one that you love.
********************
Erica is proably the one person that I wanted to go to prom with as much as Deanna.
********************
I felt almost as bad as when Deanna broke up with me.
********************
I still really want to go with Deanna to prom, but with her going to copley's prom I feel more and more like I'll just end up crying the entire night knowing shes just there because no one else would go with me.
********************
It hit me so hard so fast that Deanna isn't even around anymore and that shes happily with someone thats obvioulsly alot better than me. Deanna still means almost everything to me and its just like it doesn't matter.
********************
Happy Easter Deanna
********************
For the first time since last year I felt like Deanna and I were friends. I still really like the way I was finally able to put how I felt about her. I agree with everyone in saying that Love can't really happen in high school, but I also say I love Deanna as much as I can at this point in my lifetime. Just being around her as a friend like things used to be made me beyond happy. I started to forget how messed up things are. I don't think it was a new constant, I just think it was one of those fluke days where I am led to believe things might be getting better and then they blow up.
********************
I just want to be able to come into school tomorrow latch to Deanna and start crying.
********************
(Anonymous)
2005-04-11 07:06 pm UTC (link)
prom wouldn't be a long shot if you got off your ass and found someone besides deanna, got a life, and forgot about her. she's not worth your time anyway.
********************
So yes I found out that had I not of been a fucking idiot I would of gotten to of gone with prom with Deanna.
********************
I wanted to go with Deanna and thats it.
********************
So yeah it didn't hit me till I was walking in the halls after choir that I had actually finally gotten my day with Deanna and I fucked it up. It wasn't really that I wanted to go to prom as much as it was I wanted a day with Deanna.
********************
I can't take Deanna away all day, that would just be really crappy on my part.
********************
All I do is make Kate and Deanna's lives miserable.
********************
Kate made the statement that I was the one who's never going to get over Deanna.
********************
The whole point of going was to go with Deanna.
********************
Kate told me yesterday the only reason Deanna went out with me was becasue she felt sorry for me. She was going to break up with Aaron anyways so it wasn't a big deal I guess. I really thought that for the first time someone I really liked actually liked me back. It ends up Deanna just felt sorry enough for me to put up with me for that month. It didn't mean anything to her even though I've liked her since I met her. I'll be gone soon and she could care less and it kills me inside.
********************
You should know I would never stray away from not caring about what other think. If I did I would be in really bad shape. People like you though I do care. You really have been the only reason Ive been out of it lately. I am not going to be able to visit my parents are making me stay on campus. Deanna I am going to miss you so much. I love you like your part of my family. I want you around right now. Believe me when I say that in the long run your the only person I am going to really miss. That may make me a bad person I don't know but I just care about you so much more than anyone else. I don't think anyone else could do what you did. You impacted me so much and changed me greatly. I look at everything differently now. If I still really mean the world to you try to be around. I feel like I've already had to say goodbye. I feel like I left and nothing was said. I love you so much Deanna and I miss you. Ive been working on this comment for a half hour becasue I am crying so hard. Your the only person who can actually make me cry. No matter how mean people are to me I never let it bother me. I can't control that with you. If I could I don't think I would really want to either. I just miss you Deanna. I know when I see you in choir tomorrow after you have read this I am going to want to start crying thinking about the entry. I am going to really try not to becasue its proably the last thing you need right now. I am trying so hard to get everything thats been going through my mind into words and I really can't.
********************
I knew Deanna was going to at least say something to me after show. I started putting everything away and noised she was gone.
My mom said Deanna talked to her and gave her a hug more than once. It really didn't help. She kept trying to give a reason as to why Deanna just left or why the show was so different than past years and she couldn't. It was my last show on the stage. It was the senior farewell concert. No one said a word to me. I just really thought Deanna would of at least said something.
********************
Most Missed Memory: Deanna
********************
I think everyone here knows who Deanna is. I miss her way more than I probably should at this point, but my feelings really have changed at all. Sam and inc. have been trying to get me to not think about her anymore but it hasn't really helped.
********************
give anything to see Deanna right now
********************
Deanna needed me and I wasn't there.
********************
********************
ok i know i'll end up posting later but i really need to get this up for some people right now and jason i'm here for you i swear for anything
********************
so i've just now noticed how much I've been neglecting things... for one thing... Jason I know I haven't mentained you lately and I'm sorry I've been trying not to upset people but... I'm deciding this now I'm not going to censor myself or my life just to try to keep people happy anymore.. if you've got a problem with me all well...
********************
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JASON!!! yay lol wow ok maybe i should sleep...
********************
Naquada
Hey Deanna,
I know your really mad at me right now, but I really am sorry I didn't make it to the party. I was telling Kate last night maybe me you chis and her can all get together on a Saturday or Sunday. I also remembered that I have a vacation day reserved for choir camp, I still don't know when it is but maybe we can do something that day too.
I hope you can forgive me.....
unseenblackhole
jason i do believe kate told you she's busy the rest of the summer... and i'm still incredibly angry at you....
naquada
Are you busy the rest of the summer?
unseenblackhole
it's possible.... and i doubt the rents would let me hang out with you so don't bother....
********************
i think i'm taking jason home then i'm going to be like rushing home cause mrs. hammand is going to be calling about the job...
********************
there was about 10 minutes left to class so Doc told us to put our folders away... jason comes up behind me "one... two... three strikes you're dead at the old folks home" i about burst out in tears right there... then he kept telling me to smile... sorry how am i supposed to do that after you say that... i know he din't mean anything by it but i mean come on jason have some brains... so yeah i don't know just everything reminds me of my grandma...
********************
but yeah i got out of 5th period today to go help jason set up the pzm mic...that was intresting... had to run back to the auditorium like 4 or 5 times... cause welch took the battery out and jason didn't think of that till he couldn't find anything else wrong... so yeah deffinatly intresting...
********************
naquada
*Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug* *Hug*
Re: *Hugs*
unseenblackhole
2004-10-04 06:30 pm UTC (link) (Parent)
thanks jason but they're a lot better in person...
********************
so yeah its cold down here and i seem to be washing all my sweatshirts... so i got smart and listened to jason and went to get a blanket from upstairs...
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what if i did.... hehe actually when i did it the first time i only got candy from two people jason and amy... from who i picked... so i wanted to see if it was possible and then i was like holy cow...
********************
hey jason, i can't promise i'll even be on tonight i feel like some serious crap... and i really shouldn't even be doing this right now... but i don't know i felt horrible not giving you that hug after school... but yeah you and i will have the weekend to talk if nothing else... don't foget to call ellen and remind her to pick you up... see you in the morning hun...
********************
so yeah after school... kate and i went over to the middle school... jeen and jason went over too...
********************
i have play practice till 6 then i was supposed to go to jasons for dinner, and to figure stuff out for the play and such and such...
********************
i ended up driving jason and kate home... that was intresting...
********************
I brought the script home and I'm pretty sure I figured out who's mic is going to be on when and such, hope it works tomorrow... yeah Jason sorry I got so ticked at practice, I just felt like crap, and my wrist really hurt but yet I was still using it
********************
oh yeah last night i went over to jasons after play practice we ended up sitting around watching um i think one episode of family guy, made him turn the dvd off, watched like 3 shows of CSI, yeah that was fun... I think i feel asleep for a few minutes during one of them, I was like whoa did I fall asleep... figured out all the mic stuff and such, hope we have it almost perfect on monday and such
********************
get to tear down the risers after it too... oh yeah jasona nd I put them up during our 4th period exam... fun stuff...
********************
Jason-- you've been there for me since the begining of my freshman year, whenever I just needed to talk, or get my mind of things, or I just felt like complaining... thanks for being there and for everything... You are so good to me, I'm still not sure I deserve you as a friend, or anything else... oh and thanks for my early dinner today... I love you're mom, she is so sweet, you're lucky to have her.
********************
so yeah... Jason is coming over tomorrow after my in-car and wednesday kate russ, jason and I are going to zoo lights
********************
Jason will be here soon, but until then I'm going to go watch Breighton
********************
today during lunch Jeff found out the fire curtain had dropped when the power went down so he asked jason to come help him, I went with them because I thought it would provide some amusement... I found out that jason can do some very dumb things... I still can't believe he stood up there on the weights... I swear if Jeff had let go of the rope he would have gone flying and gotten his brains splattered all over... I'm going to drop it now...
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kate called and told me to look at the livejournal posts... i knew that dan had said something to jason because he was getting really upset with him... i don't blame him i guess... all in all it ended up being a big mess... oh and jen and jason i still have those comments you made to my journal... i'll be putting them back up so i won't forget what ya'll think bout me and dan and life in general for me...
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hmmm why do i get the feeling someone got into me e-mail and deleted jason's comment he made earlier... so that one won't be here... i guess someone really didn't want me to put that back up here...
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jason is being all depressing again... so yeah i just had a conversation with him without talking...jason is being all depressing again... so yeah i just had a conversation with him without talking... i finished my outline and bib cards... but i didn't do my rough draft... i burned my thumb last night it sucks... it's all like ow... so yeah tonight you know after this whole school thing is done... hang on hang on... jason was just called a backstreet boy... ok now back to what i wa saying...
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hey i'm not really sure whats been going on lately with you but i was really hurt today when you just kind of ignored me... i mean i'm really going to miss you... and it just feels like you've already said goodbye and left... i mean i know you're really ticked at me or something but i just wish you would have included me in what seems like the last time i'll ever see you at school...
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Hey Deanna its 11:52pm, I can't stay up any longer im beat, so I thought I would leave you a message. As far as I know im at a complete go for 2morrow. Bob was thinking around 3pm showing up hes going to call me at 11am to give me a for sure answer.
I missed you today, can't wait to see you 2morrow. Buches of *Hugs*
Night
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Deanna broke up with Aaron last night, twice. Yeah he didn't even grasp it the first time. The second time when it was well, clarified to him, I was standing right there. I felt like shit. It was not how I wanted it to go down. I guess it was the only way, and well it probably would of been worse had Deanna waited any longer. I have not had a chance to talk to Deanna yet, she’s going to be gone most of the day today. Going by her post last night she’s in a terrible mood. We obviously can't get together right away. Going by the fact that Aaron is kind of oblivious he probably has no idea Deanna and I like each other.
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xReMMuRdbMuDx (10:25:43 PM): jason...just give her a little time...i know she'll go for you
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Auto response from JSun Campanella (10:25:43 PM): just please don't make me feel any worse than I already am
http://www.livejournal.com/users/naquada
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xReMMuRdbMuDx (10:25:52 PM): if you really like her than just wait it out
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Session concluded at 10:40:17 PM
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xReMMuRdbMuDx (3:43:55 PM): hey...you know deanna and aaron are back together...right?
JSun Campanella (3:53:48 PM): what?
xReMMuRdbMuDx (4:05:53 PM): deanna and aaron are back together
xReMMuRdbMuDx (4:06:00 PM): it happened this morning...and i guess your slow at finding things out
xReMMuRdbMuDx (4:08:37 PM): you knew that though...right?
xReMMuRdbMuDx is away at 5:16:26 PM.
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Session concluded at 5:36:14 PM
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Now I guess I know how Aaron felt on Saturday
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Wow *Yawn* Its really late! Well for the most part homework is done. I still need to add a little more to my book project but nothing to much. I am going to get some sleep, you better be alseep by now. My Deanna needs to get better so she can sing tomorrow! *Majorly Big Hug* Night! Miss You!
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Good Morning My Deanna!
So yeah the presentation has gone back and forth more times than I can remember :( I think we are finally both out of ideas so as soon as Emily sends this next copy I am loading it on the presenter. I really hoped you would be on before I left. Kate signed on 20mins ago shes still doing hw too. I can't wait to see you in a few hours. *Glomps* *Hugs* *Huggles* and *Smuggles* Night my Deanna!
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<3 My Deanna!
Took foreverish for my mom to get off the phone. I don't know where you are :( I thought for sure you would be here. I really didn't want to hear the bell either. 4th period was just amazing (minus janitors and doors) I wanted to spend the rest of the day there. I think the minute I layed down I was imagining being there again. I woke up cuddled up to all the pillows and was depressed it wasn't you. I am glad you were home so I could talk to you. I hope your online soon.
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Withdrawals from my Deanna.
I thought you said you were just kidding............
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Hey Sweetheart
Ok my mom wanted to update the calendar today. She marked Thursday for Haunted High/Revere Players. She marked this friday for the football game. She put a big Deanna on next Friday, so you need to find out if its ok or not that your comming over (ok or not your comming, its marked in the calendar and can't be erased ^_^ ) Also she marked next Saturday for the bonfire. (not to be mean but I hope Kate won't be home yet Saturday) I didn't have her mark County, We will already be after school till six and you might not even be here. My mom also said I could pay our dues for prom if I wanted to. I think ill wait till after your b-day for that. I think I have a plan for tomorrow, if Jeff wants to be in the booth I will ask him to let us stay for the first assembly and he can do the one at the end of the day. Since Kate is going to be at the end of the day one I don't think it would be a good idea anyways..........
I really miss you and I am going to try to get back on later. Things are a little wierd over here right now..............
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Someone please help me Deanna means everything to me, I don't know how to fix this.
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Morning Deanna
I didn't post before you left this morning, I tried to stay up but my dad was wandering downstairs so I ended up falling asleep waiting for him to go back to his room. Hope all goes well with the bloodwork sweetheart, ill talk to you when you get home.
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Good Morning Deanna!
UnSeEnBlAcKhOlE (12:02:16 AM): uh huh dream on lover boy
Um wow that really didn't seem like you at all. I hope it wasn't because of my joke.....
Just three more days Sweetheart!!!!
Your going to do wonderful today!
I miss you!
Update 1:12am Yay I made a Livejournal icon for My Deanna! ^_^
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Well ive decided im just going to take Deanna to the auditorium before we got to the pizza party. Shes really sad your not here I home asking her out will make her a little more cheerful. Hope you get better pink!
*Pink Hugs*
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My Deanna is offically My Deanna!!!!!
I am so happy/excited I can't wait to see you tomorrow!!!!!!
*hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps* *hugs* *glomps*
ummmmm *glomps* lol
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So what do you think for Deanna??
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Deanna, I hope you get better!!!!!!
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Deanna, get better hun, sry I kinda suck at making you feel better!!!!!! *GLOMPS**GLOMPS**GLOMPS*
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Deanna, are you betterish yet???
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Deanna called and shes comming over tomorrow/today after work!!! I am super happy and excited ^_^ I am going to get to bed now so I wake up at a decent time, well maybe get up at a decent time ^_^
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So yay I got to see Deanna today/yesterday. We watched a movie and some TV.
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I Love You Deanna
Happy New Year Hun! *hugs* *kiss*
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14. happiest moment?: Deanna and I finally being official (one month is tomorrow ^_^)
15. how was your birthday?: Proably the best ever since it was actually acknowledged (Thanks Deanna, Jenn W, Kate, and Lily)
10 Things You Will Never Forget:
[5] Finding out Deanna likes me
9 Things You Regret
[1]Yelling at Deanna
[4]Making Deanna feel bad
[6]Not calling Deanna over the summer
[7]Not asking Deanna to Homecomming
[8]Not asking Deanna over for New Years Eve
6 Things I Bought:
[2] Stuffed Bears (For Kate and Deanna)
[3] Necklace (For Deanna)
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unseenblackhole
2005-01-17 02:49 pm UTC (link)
jason...
naquada
2005-01-17 05:27 pm UTC (link) (Parent)
deanna...
what?
unseenblackhole
2005-01-17 07:25 pm UTC (link) (Parent)
chill out, seriously...
naquada
2005-01-17 08:46 pm UTC (link) (Parent)
Easy for you to say, you got what you wanted....
Im the one who didn't want to be alone......
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B is for bestfriends: Deanna, Kate, and Jenn
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Im so gald that not only did the fuckers once again harrass me about Deanna today, I find out on my way out from the same fuckers that Deanna was talking about how much I suck at singing after choir. I was fucking terrified today running though the song three fucking times. Now I know that not only did she not care enough to give me the hug she said she was going to give me but that she was talking about me behind my back. Well now I know why she went quiet when she saw me after class. You know what? Im dropping out of the ensemble. They have three tenors anyways, but I guess the only reason there was three tenors was becasue I suck so much......
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THREE THINGS/PEOPLE THAT MAKE ME HAPPY:
01 | Deanna
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THREE THINGS/PEOPLE THAT MAKE ME CRY:
01 | Deanna
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THREE THINGS/PEOPLE I LOVE:
01 | Deanna
THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:
01 | Get Deanna Back
THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
01 | Fix things with Deanna
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Damn my nose started bleeding again. No I didn't watch the game. Deanna talked to me for a bit and helped me make a new cd. Made me feel better. Oh course I still can't get over the fact that she broke up with me. I anger myself to unknown extremes with stuff like that. I really need to grip reality somehow. Why can't I just let go? It sounds easy but I just can't. She still means everything to me.
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My life is ripping it's self apart. Kate and Deanna were completely pissed at me.
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Deanna was deffinatly the only thing really preventing me from crying.
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When it came time to leave Deanna steped out with me.
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I really think Deanna still likes me.
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I realized I miss Deanna more than I thought I did.
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I deffinaltly thankful that Deanna took care of me this afternoon.
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Deanna called while we were playing and she was going to possibly come back to kates for dinner.
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Ok so I was told I had to nap by Kate and Deanna.....
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Deanna Lynne Schneck is the one that you love.
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Erica is proably the one person that I wanted to go to prom with as much as Deanna.
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I felt almost as bad as when Deanna broke up with me.
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I still really want to go with Deanna to prom, but with her going to copley's prom I feel more and more like I'll just end up crying the entire night knowing shes just there because no one else would go with me.
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It hit me so hard so fast that Deanna isn't even around anymore and that shes happily with someone thats obvioulsly alot better than me. Deanna still means almost everything to me and its just like it doesn't matter.
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Happy Easter Deanna
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For the first time since last year I felt like Deanna and I were friends. I still really like the way I was finally able to put how I felt about her. I agree with everyone in saying that Love can't really happen in high school, but I also say I love Deanna as much as I can at this point in my lifetime. Just being around her as a friend like things used to be made me beyond happy. I started to forget how messed up things are. I don't think it was a new constant, I just think it was one of those fluke days where I am led to believe things might be getting better and then they blow up.
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I just want to be able to come into school tomorrow latch to Deanna and start crying.
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(Anonymous)
2005-04-11 07:06 pm UTC (link)
prom wouldn't be a long shot if you got off your ass and found someone besides deanna, got a life, and forgot about her. she's not worth your time anyway.
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So yes I found out that had I not of been a fucking idiot I would of gotten to of gone with prom with Deanna.
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I wanted to go with Deanna and thats it.
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So yeah it didn't hit me till I was walking in the halls after choir that I had actually finally gotten my day with Deanna and I fucked it up. It wasn't really that I wanted to go to prom as much as it was I wanted a day with Deanna.
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I can't take Deanna away all day, that would just be really crappy on my part.
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All I do is make Kate and Deanna's lives miserable.
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Kate made the statement that I was the one who's never going to get over Deanna.
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The whole point of going was to go with Deanna.
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Kate told me yesterday the only reason Deanna went out with me was becasue she felt sorry for me. She was going to break up with Aaron anyways so it wasn't a big deal I guess. I really thought that for the first time someone I really liked actually liked me back. It ends up Deanna just felt sorry enough for me to put up with me for that month. It didn't mean anything to her even though I've liked her since I met her. I'll be gone soon and she could care less and it kills me inside.
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You should know I would never stray away from not caring about what other think. If I did I would be in really bad shape. People like you though I do care. You really have been the only reason Ive been out of it lately. I am not going to be able to visit my parents are making me stay on campus. Deanna I am going to miss you so much. I love you like your part of my family. I want you around right now. Believe me when I say that in the long run your the only person I am going to really miss. That may make me a bad person I don't know but I just care about you so much more than anyone else. I don't think anyone else could do what you did. You impacted me so much and changed me greatly. I look at everything differently now. If I still really mean the world to you try to be around. I feel like I've already had to say goodbye. I feel like I left and nothing was said. I love you so much Deanna and I miss you. Ive been working on this comment for a half hour becasue I am crying so hard. Your the only person who can actually make me cry. No matter how mean people are to me I never let it bother me. I can't control that with you. If I could I don't think I would really want to either. I just miss you Deanna. I know when I see you in choir tomorrow after you have read this I am going to want to start crying thinking about the entry. I am going to really try not to becasue its proably the last thing you need right now. I am trying so hard to get everything thats been going through my mind into words and I really can't.
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I knew Deanna was going to at least say something to me after show. I started putting everything away and noised she was gone.
My mom said Deanna talked to her and gave her a hug more than once. It really didn't help. She kept trying to give a reason as to why Deanna just left or why the show was so different than past years and she couldn't. It was my last show on the stage. It was the senior farewell concert. No one said a word to me. I just really thought Deanna would of at least said something.
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Most Missed Memory: Deanna
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I think everyone here knows who Deanna is. I miss her way more than I probably should at this point, but my feelings really have changed at all. Sam and inc. have been trying to get me to not think about her anymore but it hasn't really helped.
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give anything to see Deanna right now
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Deanna needed me and I wasn't there.
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