(no subject)
how can you be so cruel?
you know you are all i have here
you know it
it's not that easy being away from my friends and family, i don't have the luxury of being in the same town i grew up in.
And you can't throw me at these girls that are at all the get togethers, I am different and you know it. I can't talk clothes or cheerleading or girly things. That isn't me, I want to get out and doo something, something fun, not sit around and talk.
a lot of crap is going on in my life that you don't even care to hear about, because you won't listen to me, because you don't know me, you don't me at all, you never pay attention long enough
and you think my whole life is drama, yeah it is, my life is crap, and i know it, but i just need someone there to help me, why won't you? instead of just complaining just hold me tell me it will be alright, don't give me more crap to think about.
and rachel she controls my thoughts, i hate it, no longer is it derek who i think about, ha , it's rachel. I can't stand it. I am always reminded of her, always, I am constantly thinking that you are thinking about her and wanting her back, and I say to myself, I am not as pretty as her, as good as good, as whatever, you even told me the other night i am not good enough for you, and maybe i'm not, and the thought goes through my mind, all the things she did for you, i can never compare no matter how hard i try. I can't be good enough. I can't be good enough for anyone, because i always manage to screw it up, I am perfect for no one. NO ONE. No one not even my own family thinks I am good enough.
and chruch doesn't even matter to you, it's only important is derek is going there, and now that he moved i guess forget church. Not important to go with me or anything.
I just want to be done with life, just be old, just fast forward, so i can be on my death bed now.
i have nothing left to do but cry myself to sleep and hope for the best
you know you are all i have here
you know it
it's not that easy being away from my friends and family, i don't have the luxury of being in the same town i grew up in.
And you can't throw me at these girls that are at all the get togethers, I am different and you know it. I can't talk clothes or cheerleading or girly things. That isn't me, I want to get out and doo something, something fun, not sit around and talk.
a lot of crap is going on in my life that you don't even care to hear about, because you won't listen to me, because you don't know me, you don't me at all, you never pay attention long enough
and you think my whole life is drama, yeah it is, my life is crap, and i know it, but i just need someone there to help me, why won't you? instead of just complaining just hold me tell me it will be alright, don't give me more crap to think about.
and rachel she controls my thoughts, i hate it, no longer is it derek who i think about, ha , it's rachel. I can't stand it. I am always reminded of her, always, I am constantly thinking that you are thinking about her and wanting her back, and I say to myself, I am not as pretty as her, as good as good, as whatever, you even told me the other night i am not good enough for you, and maybe i'm not, and the thought goes through my mind, all the things she did for you, i can never compare no matter how hard i try. I can't be good enough. I can't be good enough for anyone, because i always manage to screw it up, I am perfect for no one. NO ONE. No one not even my own family thinks I am good enough.
and chruch doesn't even matter to you, it's only important is derek is going there, and now that he moved i guess forget church. Not important to go with me or anything.
I just want to be done with life, just be old, just fast forward, so i can be on my death bed now.
i have nothing left to do but cry myself to sleep and hope for the best