OCD and Introversion
Whenever I go shopping alone I truly realize how OCD and introverted/antisocial I am;
For instance today- went grocery shopping and a man- possibly late 30’s early 40’s, asked me what the writing on my shirt (slightly obscured by my cropped denim jacket) said- freaked me out a little- we are at a grocery store, I go in with the purpose of finding food, paying for it, and getting out- I’m not there to make friends or read other people’s shirts- seriously, why is he looking at my shirt and not the food on the shelves?! We crossed paths 2 more times in that store, and each time he made an effort to make eye contact and smile at me- each time I reminded myself that my car keys were half hanging out of my left pocket for easy access and, while he was too tall for me to gouge his eyes out, I could probably still stab him in the testicles. This did not take place at night, this happened in the middle of the day in a store filled with people (witnesses), and looking back, it was probably a coincidence and the man was most likely NOT a stalker/rapist- but strangers making eye contact and smiling at me weird me out- why are you talking to me? Why are you looking at me? I don’t know you; there is no reason for you to be trying to interact with me. Seriously, the only time that I talk to other customers is if we accidentally bump into one another because of limited space and an apology is expected. Even if someone is blocking the aisle or is standing in front of something I want, I will not say “excuse me,” I will silently wait for them to move. Doesn’t matter if the other person is male or female; I don’t want them looking or talking to me. I shop with my head down, eyes glued to my list and the products on the shelves. I try to avoid walking down aisles with people in them if possible. Anyone talks to me I become very suspicious as to what their motives are. The only person I should ever have to communicate or look at when shopping is the cashier, and the only interaction I want from that is for them to tell me what my total is.
As for OCD, it seems to kick in whenever I shop alone. Cashiers are talkative and judgmental (not the teenagers or young adults who are just trying to get through the day as quickly as possible, I mean the older ones who have given up on life and realize this is the only socialization/excitement they will ever get) I get comments about having the most organized shopping cart they’ve ever seen, or that my home must be extremely clean (which is odd because my living space often resembles that of a very well to do pack rat. Without really paying attention, I seem to always organize the contents of my cart by size, weight, type, quantity, temperature (and if I am in a craft store, color) I even stack my yogurts in 2 straight rows, same flavors together never mixed, I don’t know why, but it bugs me if they aren’t like this, and the items are clearly divided in a way that they aren’t laying on top of each other or getting mixed together and everything in the cart is separate and clearly visible. I place them on the counter in a specific order as well. I don’t know why I do this. And while the yogurt thing bugs me no matter what, I don’t put much effort in organizing the cart if I am shopping with others like my mom or my husband.
Anyone else have these problems?
For instance today- went grocery shopping and a man- possibly late 30’s early 40’s, asked me what the writing on my shirt (slightly obscured by my cropped denim jacket) said- freaked me out a little- we are at a grocery store, I go in with the purpose of finding food, paying for it, and getting out- I’m not there to make friends or read other people’s shirts- seriously, why is he looking at my shirt and not the food on the shelves?! We crossed paths 2 more times in that store, and each time he made an effort to make eye contact and smile at me- each time I reminded myself that my car keys were half hanging out of my left pocket for easy access and, while he was too tall for me to gouge his eyes out, I could probably still stab him in the testicles. This did not take place at night, this happened in the middle of the day in a store filled with people (witnesses), and looking back, it was probably a coincidence and the man was most likely NOT a stalker/rapist- but strangers making eye contact and smiling at me weird me out- why are you talking to me? Why are you looking at me? I don’t know you; there is no reason for you to be trying to interact with me. Seriously, the only time that I talk to other customers is if we accidentally bump into one another because of limited space and an apology is expected. Even if someone is blocking the aisle or is standing in front of something I want, I will not say “excuse me,” I will silently wait for them to move. Doesn’t matter if the other person is male or female; I don’t want them looking or talking to me. I shop with my head down, eyes glued to my list and the products on the shelves. I try to avoid walking down aisles with people in them if possible. Anyone talks to me I become very suspicious as to what their motives are. The only person I should ever have to communicate or look at when shopping is the cashier, and the only interaction I want from that is for them to tell me what my total is.
As for OCD, it seems to kick in whenever I shop alone. Cashiers are talkative and judgmental (not the teenagers or young adults who are just trying to get through the day as quickly as possible, I mean the older ones who have given up on life and realize this is the only socialization/excitement they will ever get) I get comments about having the most organized shopping cart they’ve ever seen, or that my home must be extremely clean (which is odd because my living space often resembles that of a very well to do pack rat. Without really paying attention, I seem to always organize the contents of my cart by size, weight, type, quantity, temperature (and if I am in a craft store, color) I even stack my yogurts in 2 straight rows, same flavors together never mixed, I don’t know why, but it bugs me if they aren’t like this, and the items are clearly divided in a way that they aren’t laying on top of each other or getting mixed together and everything in the cart is separate and clearly visible. I place them on the counter in a specific order as well. I don’t know why I do this. And while the yogurt thing bugs me no matter what, I don’t put much effort in organizing the cart if I am shopping with others like my mom or my husband.
Anyone else have these problems?