Finally someone Pin-Pointed the Problem
So life has been a huge rollercoaster for me. Ive been super happy, super sad, angry, irritable, sick, healthy, fatigued, extreme energy, sleeping too much, not sleeping enough my body has been insane and I never understood why. Doctors have tried to diagnose me with different problems: anxiety, blaming it on pills I'm taking, never really understood what it was I was going through. I've been in and out of ER for the past 2-3 years only to be sent home with no problems. But I've been sinking a lot this year, usually I was able to work through it and get over it but then it would come back bt at least I was able to get through it. Now I'm not able to get through it and it is ruining my life, my happiness, my relationships. SO I went to the doctors again this past thursday and asked them to test me for depression. My parents had been doing a lot of research and kept telling me that what I was going through was depression. But I didnt want to believe them until I started doing my wn research and started really observing myself, my actions, my behavior with others and how it was affecting me! So I went to the doctors and he asked me a bunch of questions and agreed that I was suffering from depression. So he has sent me to a physciatrist to get evaluated. So on Sept 2nd I have an orientation on the department and then I will have an evaluation test done on me and then we will continue treatment from there depending on what they diagnose me with! But the first step was admitting to myself that I need help and I'm going to change my life around because I do not like being this way.
Work has been okay. Not really where I pictured myself at this time in my life and Ive allowed myself to be swallowed into this hole that has been hard to get out of. Financially I cannot leave this job and so I need to find a way to get myself financially set and then go and try and find something that will make me happy. I think this is one of the biggest stresses in my life right now.
But I'm going to make something happen for me, i'm not going to allow myself to sink. I'm not that person that is going to settle for what I can get, I'm going to reach for more. Last week I signed up for the Wedding Planner Institute in which I will be doing a self study Wedding Planner and Event Course. At the end of this course I will be certified as a Wedding/Event Planner and hhopefully be able to start my own side business which can grow into something even bigger. I have so much to offer.
I also am looking to adopt a puppy. I found a Chihuahua/Rat Terrier Mix that I have fallen in love with. I found him online and contacted the rescue company that is holding him for adoption. I went to meet the puppy on Sunday and have fallen in love. I turned in my adoption papers and am waiting to hear back from the adoption agency :) I hope that they choose me for the adoption cause I was ready to take the puppy home the moment I saw him!
Robert and I drove all the way to Santa Monica to go see him, thats how bad I want him.
Bowling has been going pretty good. We suck still but thats okay we've been having tons of fun :) Its a pain trying to get everyone there but we are almost done. We played our last game on Sunday and this weekend we play sweeps at Morongo. Since we have to be there at 1130am on Sunday we decided just to stay the entire weekend. So that shoudl be fun, I get to do some gambling :)
I've also been having some back and neck pains lately so I convinced my daddy to get me a new mattress. So Sunday we went and did that; it'll be delivered to my house tomorrow :) Can't wait, it was soooooo comfy compared to my old hard mattress. Finally some sleep!
I know im all over the place with my thoughts.
I signed up to take continuation of education classes at Rio Hondo. Hopeing I can get into a web design class so that I can learn how to do it. I want to make my own websites and if they look good I can offer it to others :)
Saturday we had a Castillo reunion. This entailed the following people: Carlos & Lilia with their daughter Anna (her family: Rick, Kelly (bf Eric), Tracie, Brittney) & daughter Amy (partner Barbara). Thomas & Marie with their daughter Janet( fam: Tim, William, Ben) & son Richard(wife Brigette). Arturo & Gladys with their sons: Arturo (fam: Tita, Roxy, Nanis (bf Robert)& Albert (fam: Lisa, MacKenna, Adam, Josh, Albert (gf Jessica). Then I got to meet famiyl from miami that I have never met: Laito, Cookies, & Tony. It was a relly nice get together. Got to hang out with family that I havent seen in years or havent seen at all. Got to catch up with everyone. Kelly is pregnant and beautiful. She is so cute!! We all got together at Albert and Lisas. They did a lechon which was yummy and it was good times. Hope we do it again soon.
The gym has been really good for me, I wish I had more time to get my butt down there. Been working on pilates and training with my trainer but thats it. 2 times a week, I want to be going more often but theres always something to do. But Im enjoying the massage part of my package. I get another massage tonight @ 6pm.
I think thats everything that I have in mind now. I'll update more another day :)
Work has been okay. Not really where I pictured myself at this time in my life and Ive allowed myself to be swallowed into this hole that has been hard to get out of. Financially I cannot leave this job and so I need to find a way to get myself financially set and then go and try and find something that will make me happy. I think this is one of the biggest stresses in my life right now.
But I'm going to make something happen for me, i'm not going to allow myself to sink. I'm not that person that is going to settle for what I can get, I'm going to reach for more. Last week I signed up for the Wedding Planner Institute in which I will be doing a self study Wedding Planner and Event Course. At the end of this course I will be certified as a Wedding/Event Planner and hhopefully be able to start my own side business which can grow into something even bigger. I have so much to offer.
I also am looking to adopt a puppy. I found a Chihuahua/Rat Terrier Mix that I have fallen in love with. I found him online and contacted the rescue company that is holding him for adoption. I went to meet the puppy on Sunday and have fallen in love. I turned in my adoption papers and am waiting to hear back from the adoption agency :) I hope that they choose me for the adoption cause I was ready to take the puppy home the moment I saw him!
Robert and I drove all the way to Santa Monica to go see him, thats how bad I want him.
Bowling has been going pretty good. We suck still but thats okay we've been having tons of fun :) Its a pain trying to get everyone there but we are almost done. We played our last game on Sunday and this weekend we play sweeps at Morongo. Since we have to be there at 1130am on Sunday we decided just to stay the entire weekend. So that shoudl be fun, I get to do some gambling :)
I've also been having some back and neck pains lately so I convinced my daddy to get me a new mattress. So Sunday we went and did that; it'll be delivered to my house tomorrow :) Can't wait, it was soooooo comfy compared to my old hard mattress. Finally some sleep!
I know im all over the place with my thoughts.
I signed up to take continuation of education classes at Rio Hondo. Hopeing I can get into a web design class so that I can learn how to do it. I want to make my own websites and if they look good I can offer it to others :)
Saturday we had a Castillo reunion. This entailed the following people: Carlos & Lilia with their daughter Anna (her family: Rick, Kelly (bf Eric), Tracie, Brittney) & daughter Amy (partner Barbara). Thomas & Marie with their daughter Janet( fam: Tim, William, Ben) & son Richard(wife Brigette). Arturo & Gladys with their sons: Arturo (fam: Tita, Roxy, Nanis (bf Robert)& Albert (fam: Lisa, MacKenna, Adam, Josh, Albert (gf Jessica). Then I got to meet famiyl from miami that I have never met: Laito, Cookies, & Tony. It was a relly nice get together. Got to hang out with family that I havent seen in years or havent seen at all. Got to catch up with everyone. Kelly is pregnant and beautiful. She is so cute!! We all got together at Albert and Lisas. They did a lechon which was yummy and it was good times. Hope we do it again soon.
The gym has been really good for me, I wish I had more time to get my butt down there. Been working on pilates and training with my trainer but thats it. 2 times a week, I want to be going more often but theres always something to do. But Im enjoying the massage part of my package. I get another massage tonight @ 6pm.
I think thats everything that I have in mind now. I'll update more another day :)