thoughts
Feels like a lot is going on in my life.
My mom is going through chemo, I'm graduating, I won't have a job, I won't have money, and stuff is happening in my dating life again.
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When I graduated from high school, I knew things were changing, but it didn't bother me then because I knew where I was going. Now, however, I'm so lost. I don't have plans, or any idea really. I always thought I'd go on to get an MD, PhD, or at least some masters, but I'm tired of school. I'm tired of the way things are.
I don't know that finding a job is the solution, but I don't have a choice since my loans are going to attack me. Even if I'm jobless for a month or two, I feel I can't enjoy those months because I have no income.
So this is why people have savings! Even when they are jobless, they'll have some spending money...I should of saved something...but I didn't. My lab will hire me part time, but for only one day (8 hours) a week. It's better than nothing... I just realized that even with the cheapest parking, 1/3 of my salary would go towards parking. Then, what's left is barely enough to pay for phone and gas bills with $22 left over each month (that's if the price of gas doesn't go up).
I grew up poor, so I should be used to this! I don't like to be scrapped for cash...I can't eat everything that I want to... Oh, I'm such a PIG!
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Mom's not doing too bad. Although her appointments, therapies, and treatments are costing a lot. I think it's a good thing that dad and I aren't cheap. Even though we're not rich, even if we can't afford it, we're gonna give mom everything she needs. Right now, she's weaker than usual, but she can still walk around the house. Just hope that everything stays okay...I don't want her 2nd chemo treatment to make her more weak. On the bright side, it looks like she'll be able to attend my commencement and watch me graduate, yay!
I'm glad my brothers (at least one of them) is growing up. Taking responsibilities around the house and helping mom out. It makes it a lot better for me and dad. I must say that I'm surprised at how responsible he has been. I think college has changed him, or, the finally realizes how dangerous mom's illness is.
I need to look for places where I can take my mom and my family. Someplace indoors with a lot to see that is within driving distance.
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Mom went to see a prophet, and the prophet said that I will have a lot of guys hitting on me this year, but none of them would work out. That sucks! I'm dating a guy and so far he's nice...I don't want to believe the prophet...
Also, I don't know if I want to be in a relationship with him. He's nice, he tries to be on time, so far he's not a jerk... but I feel like there should be more to him than, "he's not bad." I want some excitement, but at the same time I would feel bad rejecting him when he's done nothing wrong.
is there anyone out there who gets back with their ex and it works out?
hmmm...how do I know when someone is right for me?
My mom is going through chemo, I'm graduating, I won't have a job, I won't have money, and stuff is happening in my dating life again.
-----
When I graduated from high school, I knew things were changing, but it didn't bother me then because I knew where I was going. Now, however, I'm so lost. I don't have plans, or any idea really. I always thought I'd go on to get an MD, PhD, or at least some masters, but I'm tired of school. I'm tired of the way things are.
I don't know that finding a job is the solution, but I don't have a choice since my loans are going to attack me. Even if I'm jobless for a month or two, I feel I can't enjoy those months because I have no income.
So this is why people have savings! Even when they are jobless, they'll have some spending money...I should of saved something...but I didn't. My lab will hire me part time, but for only one day (8 hours) a week. It's better than nothing... I just realized that even with the cheapest parking, 1/3 of my salary would go towards parking. Then, what's left is barely enough to pay for phone and gas bills with $22 left over each month (that's if the price of gas doesn't go up).
I grew up poor, so I should be used to this! I don't like to be scrapped for cash...I can't eat everything that I want to... Oh, I'm such a PIG!
-----
Mom's not doing too bad. Although her appointments, therapies, and treatments are costing a lot. I think it's a good thing that dad and I aren't cheap. Even though we're not rich, even if we can't afford it, we're gonna give mom everything she needs. Right now, she's weaker than usual, but she can still walk around the house. Just hope that everything stays okay...I don't want her 2nd chemo treatment to make her more weak. On the bright side, it looks like she'll be able to attend my commencement and watch me graduate, yay!
I'm glad my brothers (at least one of them) is growing up. Taking responsibilities around the house and helping mom out. It makes it a lot better for me and dad. I must say that I'm surprised at how responsible he has been. I think college has changed him, or, the finally realizes how dangerous mom's illness is.
I need to look for places where I can take my mom and my family. Someplace indoors with a lot to see that is within driving distance.
-----
Mom went to see a prophet, and the prophet said that I will have a lot of guys hitting on me this year, but none of them would work out. That sucks! I'm dating a guy and so far he's nice...I don't want to believe the prophet...
Also, I don't know if I want to be in a relationship with him. He's nice, he tries to be on time, so far he's not a jerk... but I feel like there should be more to him than, "he's not bad." I want some excitement, but at the same time I would feel bad rejecting him when he's done nothing wrong.
is there anyone out there who gets back with their ex and it works out?
hmmm...how do I know when someone is right for me?