So it's been a while..
Correction, its been a long while. So im just going to experiment on how long i can keep up the idea of posting regular journal entries. but knowing myself and my superb memory, it wont last long. so we're just going to make the most of it, shall we?
thanksgiving tomorrow. yay. i baked two pies today and im rather proud of myself. albeit pumpkin pies, AKA the easiest ones you can make, but i feel pretty accomplished never the less. my brother is home from college, and its a big relief. except ive forgotten how muchhe nags at me. funny how those things happen, right? like, i feel we tend to idealize people or things that we crave, miss, want. ect. its both a curse and blessing i believe. i mean, its fun to fantasize about said objects or people in the cookie cutter form that you want it to fit in in your mind. like, say, seeing your crush after a long summer or something. you would be lying if the thought of a sudden interest in your or grand, spectacular move occured once you got back, dazzling smile and all. i know ive fallen into that trap time and time again. but i guess its unnavoidable.
oh dear. i dont have much else to say. isnt that horrible? when you have nothing to say to the world? it happens to me alot. especially when i speak. my words dont satisfy the thoughts of my mind, it seems. and its frustrating. because usually its something that someone somewhere ought to be hearing, but i just cant say it, and i pray to god that i dont forget it.
i dont want to lose these twisted words in my head, whether anyone can understand them or not. they make sense to me, and they make sense to god. and in the end, isnt that enough?
thanksgiving tomorrow. yay. i baked two pies today and im rather proud of myself. albeit pumpkin pies, AKA the easiest ones you can make, but i feel pretty accomplished never the less. my brother is home from college, and its a big relief. except ive forgotten how muchhe nags at me. funny how those things happen, right? like, i feel we tend to idealize people or things that we crave, miss, want. ect. its both a curse and blessing i believe. i mean, its fun to fantasize about said objects or people in the cookie cutter form that you want it to fit in in your mind. like, say, seeing your crush after a long summer or something. you would be lying if the thought of a sudden interest in your or grand, spectacular move occured once you got back, dazzling smile and all. i know ive fallen into that trap time and time again. but i guess its unnavoidable.
oh dear. i dont have much else to say. isnt that horrible? when you have nothing to say to the world? it happens to me alot. especially when i speak. my words dont satisfy the thoughts of my mind, it seems. and its frustrating. because usually its something that someone somewhere ought to be hearing, but i just cant say it, and i pray to god that i dont forget it.
i dont want to lose these twisted words in my head, whether anyone can understand them or not. they make sense to me, and they make sense to god. and in the end, isnt that enough?