Rocket Men - Chapter 1
<< Masterpost
Soyuz - Union (Russian); spacecraft designed by the Soviet space programme in the 1960s; after the retirement of the US Space Shuttle fleet it is main transportation device to and from the International Space Station.
***
Today is the day.
That's the sentence Jensen has repeated to himself for the last twelve hours, yet he still can't quite believe it.
However, “Today's the day,” he mutters.
“What did you say?” Osric asks from beside him.
Jensen takes a deep breath and adjusts the folds of his pressure suit for the umpteenth time in the last four hours. “I said, today's the day.”
Osric chuckles, while Mark comments from behind them, “I cannot believe it either.”
“I mean, we're strapped to three hundred and change metric tons of metal and explosives, and we're still looking forward to being launched into space,” Jensen laughs and shakes his head as much as his helmet allows. “Who does that? On their own accord? I mean it's one of the safest ways to get astronauts to the ISS and more people die in car accidents than spacecraft-related accidents, but really?”
“You're rambling,” Osric notes with a grin.
“Yeah, I'm nervous,” Jensen admits.
“But,” Mark throws in, “Doesn't it sound like the beginning of a bad joke? An American, a British and a Chinese man travel to the International Space Station in a Soyuz rocket. What happens?”
“Technically, I'm Canadian, you know. Dual citizenship, sent here from the CSA, which has a C for Canadian and an S and an A for Space Agency,” Osric replies over his shoulder, then snorts. “And that joke didn't work.”
“Well, I'm going to blame it on the situation as a whole,” Mark waves it off and sighs, tension oozing off of him in waves.
That's when the intercom interrupts them and Jensen's pulse starts running at way too fast a pace. It's the moment they've been waiting for for hours now.
“This is launch control to commander,” the tinny voice says with a thick Russian accent.
“Commander Ackles to Cosmodrome Baikonur launch control,” Jensen manages to answer with a relatively stable voice. “The crew is ready for take-off.”
“All systems are go for launch,” ground control announces. “Engine start in T minus 60 seconds.”
“Jeez,” Osric huffs out via their on-board intercom. “They used to always have like, nine minutes countdown for the Space Shuttle starts. Give a guy some warning.”
Jensen smiles to himself, covering his nervousness. “Confirmed,” he says to launch control.
The seconds tick by so slowly, Jensen can almost feel how it drives everyone mad, the atmosphere in their little capsule charged with anticipation and excitement.
“Engine start in five.”
Jensen moves his lips silently around the numbers. Five, four, three, two, one.
The rocket jerks and sways on its axis as the four by four booster engines start. From there, it's fifteen seconds until the turbopumps are at full power and deliver enough fuel to the boosters so they can actually get the rocket with their little spaceship on top from the launch pad into the air.
Jensen closes his eyes and counts those fifteen seconds, too.
It's not a jostling, harsh push that goes through the Soyuz, it's more like someone dropped something heavy right into Jensen's lap and pushed him into his individually formed, foam-covered seat. Beside him, Osric grunts in surprise.
“We have liftoff,” launch control announces.
Jensen is too busy catching his breath to answer or make any comment. The thrust of the rocket is becoming increasingly intense, building up to its maximum of six times the earth's gravitation.
In silence, they just hang on and try to enjoy the ride as much as possible
After two minutes, ground control notes, “Booster rocket separation initiated.”
As the rocket burns through all its fuel, it becomes lighter and lighter, allowing the engines to accelerate it up to 17,500 miles per hour. They travel through the lower parts of the atmosphere, and through the part where they will lose radio connection to ground control.
Then they're in space. Officially in space. Officially astronauts.
“Wow,” Osric breathes out.
“Yeah,” Jensen says after following his look out the window, where they can see parts of Asia becoming smaller beyond them.
With a little bit of luck, they'll make it to the ISS in about six hours.
“Separation from second stage confirmed,” ground control says as another lurch shakes the spaceship. “Everything working as expected.”
Jensen takes another deep breath, even though his lungs are burning and his heart is threatening to jump right out of his chest.
In front of him, his water bag starts to float.
***
When the rendezvous between the ISS and their Soyuz is finished and the hatch opens, the relief among their little crew is palpable.
After more than ten hours, including the waiting period that they'd spent in the Soyuz before launch, Jensen is just happy to finally stretch his legs.
“Welcome on board the International Space Station!” a voice announces from behind the hatch. It's guttural and rich, although the speaker is not a native English speaker.
Jensen takes the proffered hand to allow himself to be pulled into the station, where he's faced with a grinning guy with a Russian flag stitched to his sleeve, shining blue eyes and messy dark hair. The first thought that shoots through his mind is that their commander is smoking hot, but this isn't the time or the place to think about it.
“Commander Krushnic,” Jensen greets him. “Nice to meet you.”
“Nice to meet you, too, no-longer-commander Ackles,” the cosmonaut grins and pulls him into a hug. “You can call me Misha.”
“Jensen.”
The others exit the Soyuz and introductions are made with handshakes and hugs all around. Everybody is genuinely happy to meet new people, and Jensen finally connects the names he already knows to the faces in front of him. Krushnic, commander of ISS mission 42 and the upcoming 43, Harris, microbiologist, Murray, engineer, Bush, geographer, Wasilew, also engineer, and Korsakov, physicist. No one bothers with their PhD titles up here, since the cold, dark space doesn't care either whether you've got a doctorate or not.
Afterwards, Misha claps his hands. “Alright. So I suggest we all head over to Unity and grab something to eat. I bet you guys are hungry,” Misha offers and waits for Jensen's gesture to lead the way.
On the way to the module, Jensen takes a minute to get used to the feeling of floating in a zero gravity environment. They've been trained for this in an oversized swimming pool, but it's completely different to actually experience it - to have no concept of where up and down is, to have to grab on to something so you don't float away, to be able to spin on your axis whatever way. Around him, everything is covered in velcro, since they docked onto the Pirs module and are visiting the Russian part of the space station first. The air ventilation hums in the background, a noise Jensen is sure he won't consciously be aware of in barely a couple days.
It's kind of cozy, even though everything around him is packed with laptops and research material, pens taped to the table and the walls - floor, ceiling? - and there's the two sleeping berths of the Russian segment, complementing the other four in the American segment.
The onboard crew is excited to see new faces after being cooped up with each other for over three months, three of the crew are looking forward to going home soon, three of them are thrilled to be in space at all - and due to all of that, it's really not hard to have a good time.
Harris - Danneel - pretty much latches onto him from the get-go.
“So you're a biologist, too?” she asks him.
“Biologist with a minor in medicine and some engineering experience,” Jensen answers, and just like that, they're knee-deep in an engaging conversation that keeps Jensen on his toes. She's whip-smart and funny, and Jensen likes her from the very spot.
The two Russians are a bit more reserved, but friendly, and Misha makes up for both of them without even trying. Sophia is really nice, but also seems quite exhausted, while Chad is buzzing with happiness about his upcoming departure.
Together, they have one last meal, cramming around the dinner table that was originally designed for six people. Jensen's first meal in space is Szegedin goulash that isn't even half bad. It's weird to eat out of a plastic bag that comes out of a food warmer box and needs to be filled up with water from a dispenser on the wall, but Jensen knows he soon won't question it any more.
They continue the changeover of the crew by attaching their mission insignia to the Unity module's wall.
It's a simple hexagonal design, dark blue background with the earth and the ISS and the number 43 in it. Along the rim, there are their names - Krushnic, Harris, Korsakov, Ackles, Sheppard, Chau. Jensen still feels like Neil Armstrong when he looks at their little sticker among all those older ones, because their little symbol is right among famous Space Shuttle and ISS assembly missions. They're a small part of this amazing endeavor.
Next, they claim their sleeping bunks by sticking their names above the respective doors.
Jensen ends up with one of the two bunks in the service module Zvezda, in the Russian segment of the ISS. It's Wasilew's old berth, and the one opposite the hallway is Misha's.
Then it's time to load up the Soyuz on the opposite docking station Poisk and make it ready for the departure of three of their astronauts. Chad Murray, Sophia Bush and Alexandr Wasilew will go home tonight, and it's kind of a Hi and Bye moment for Jensen and his part of the crew.
Misha is the one who rings them off with an old ship bell, a tradition for departing spacecrafts from the ISS, and after the hurry and the noise of nine people milling about the confines of the station, Jensen eventually finds himself sitting in the Cupola module two hours later, looking out the 180° glass window. For the first time in almost two days, he takes a deep breath as he watches the Soyuz drift down towards the earth.
He's here, he's in space, they made it, and this is going to be it for the next six months.
“Amazing, isn't it?” a voice asks from behind him.
Jensen looks down to find Misha smiling at him. “Yeah. We didn't have much time to watch on the way up.”
“Night start?”
“Yeah,” Jensen nods.
“I can only recommend taking a few minutes every day to look out the window. I do that, too. It puts a lot of things into perspective,” Misha explains as he opens a few shutters to increase their view. “But remember to close the shutters afterwards, they protect the windows from debris.”
“Sure,” Jensen smiles, then takes a moment to turn towards Misha, who is now floating with his legs crossed underneath him.
At Jensen's curious gaze, Misha explains, “It's the closest thing you get to sitting up here.”
“So, you miss it?”
“Sitting? Nah. You don't need much rest here, since you barely put any strain on your body anyway. Then again, a nice, fluffy mattress and a sheet and cushion to lay down on... sounds really tempting,” Misha sighs.
Jensen tries to find a comfortable position to talk to Misha, but eventually just gives up and lets his legs float the way they want to. “How long has it been for you?”
“Three months and two days. And since I'm one of the two astronauts on a long-term stay, I won't go back to earth until you do.”
“The other is Danneel, right?” Not that Jensen doesn't know that, but he tries to keep the conversation going.
Misha raises an eyebrow, knowing exactly what Jensen's doing, but nods. “She's pretty much the best thing that happened to me here.”
That, on the other hand, makes Jensen curious. “How so?”
Misha tilts his head as he thinks and considers his answer. Eventually, he shrugs and smiles to himself. “She's a great scientist, a trustworthy colleague and an even better friend.”
For a moment, Jensen has an idea that he can't quite shake, so he just spits it out. “So you aren't a couple, then? Because I kinda understood it like that at first.”
Misha laughs as if that was the most surreal thought Jensen could've come up with. “No, we aren't.”
“Yeah, I,” Jensen clears his throat, feeling slightly embarrassed. “Don't get me wrong here, I meant no offense. I guess it'd be very difficult having a relationship up here, with a colleague.”
With a click of his tongue, Misha grins. “You could say that. Which is why I'm glad that Chad and Sophia are on their way home.”
That makes Jensen perk up from where he was studying Italy flying by at 28,000 kilometers per hour. “They were an item?”
“Some days. Some days not. After Chad tried to hook up with her - and let me tell you, this space station isn't big enough to ignore him completely - and she gave in about six weeks later, it was an on and off type of relationship that drove everybody nuts. Not that we didn't like Chad or Sophia respectively, we all worked great as a team, but if those two had spent one more day cooped up here with each other...” Misha breaks off to shake his head.
Jensen gets it more than he wants to let on, so he just says. “I can imagine. I mean, up here, just six people being cooped up for months, you must either get cabin fever or Big Brother syndrome.”
“Big Brother syndrome?” Misha asks, squinting with confusion.
“Uh,” Jensen scratches the back of his neck. “You know, from the TV show Big Brother. People seemingly falling in love with each other or hooking up because they admire that person and have a limited social circle while living in a limited living environment with total strangers. And so they make bad choices because they have no concept of reality.”
“Definitely that,” Misha agrees. “Although I doubt those two would've worked down on earth, anyway.”
Jensen chuckles, then silence spreads between them, but it's far from uncomfortable.
“I think I might like you,” Misha says after a while with a forlorn look into space - literally.
Jensen starts laughing out of reflex. “Right back at you.”
***
Life on the station takes some getting used to. There's velcro and tape everywhere to stick stuff to the racks on the wall, in order not to lose it and have to search for it in the air vents, and Jensen definitely has to get used to entering Node 3 - Tranquility, as it's called - and seeing someone strapped to the treadmill, running, tilted at a ninety degree angle. It's strange, but also kind of funny if someone else is doing the weight-lifting with the help of the hydraulics system behind the treadmill, and who is basically upside-down.
There's also the fact that you pee into a hose, and the urine is filtered and cleaned by the station's system, and returns as drinkable water from the water dispensers. Jensen's over that pretty quickly. The food is a bit different, but definitely not the worst he has ever had.
Daily sponge baths aren't as impractical as they might seem, but Jensen decides to go for a bald head in favor of having to wash his hair every day. It's a neat trick, even though he feels kind of naked after Danni is done with him.
“Man, that looks strange,” she says scrunching up her nose and looking adorable in the process. “Please let it grow out again.”
“Well, it was worth a shot,” he grins and shrugs, then runs his hand over his strangely smooth head.
“Once-in-a-lifetime experiment, rather,” Danneel shakes her head, which makes her ponytail drift from left to right where it's already standing upright. When she runs her fingertips over his head, too, and meets Jensen's hand, she doesn't pull away. “No, please don't do that ever again. You were so handsome with your hair.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Jensen chuckles, a bit embarrassed, as he retrieves his hand.
It only gets worse once Mark and Osric see him and laugh for ten minutes straight.
Jensen just rolls his eyes.
He has known Osric and Mark for months now. They trained together at the ESA center in Cologne, Germany, and at the NASA Kennedy Space Center in Cape Canaveral. They're allowed to make fun of him.
When Danneel returns home in three months, Mark will be the next long-term astronaut on the ISS to follow in her footsteps. Osric is a bit of a Duracell bunny, but a wunderkind nonetheless. MIT student at age fifteen and with a PhD in physics at twenty-one. There should've been a Russian cosmonaut in his place who pulled back from the mission for personal reasons, which is why Osric is here at all. He's been incredibly lucky, but the refreshing part is that he's very aware of that.
As for Yuri, Jensen pretty much has formed his opinion about him by the second day on the station. Misha is considering how they can repair one of the non-pressurized modules with the robotic arm, and uses the words, “It's gonna be a tight fit and you're gonna have to be careful.”
Which is followed by the first time Jensen ever hears Yuri speak. “That's what she said,” he deadpans in a thick Russian accent, and after recovering from the fact that yes, Yuri does speak, every single one of them breaks out into loud laughter.
It's only the first time in a series of Yuri catching everyone off guard with his dry humor. Misha's is very similar to his, and when they start chatting in Russian, they have lengthy conversations that no one can follow.
Danneel is just a pleasure to be around. It doesn’t matter whether they're working on an experiment in the Columbus module - the European lab module - or if they're hanging out around the dinner table, all six of them, on Friday and Saturday nights to watch a movie. She laments the fact that they can't have beer on the station, misses barbecue like Jensen misses his dad's t-bone steak fresh from the grill, and she shares Jensen's humor in a way that would be creepy if it wasn't so perfect.
In another world, in another time, Jensen can see himself growing old with her.
Between experiments and work and warmed-up soup in a plastic bag, Jensen knows exactly what he doesn't want, though, and that is another relationship at work.
Once bitten, twice shy, and not ashamed of it.
***
“Hey,” Danni greets him as Jensen is right in the middle of stepping into the bottom half of his space suit with a little help from Misha. “You ready for your first spacewalk?”
“Almost,” Jensen returns her smile. “We just gotta fix the bottom part and then--”
Misha scolds him with a sharp look. “Stop being so impatient. We have to test the systems and the pressure, and... just, let me do my work here.”
Danni shoots a sympathetic smile his way, and Jensen has to grin. He's nervous, and he's going to be in open space soon, in his very own mini-spaceship, since that's what the suits are. Geez, he's going to be in space. Like, space. The real thing. He's almost shaking he's so excited and looking forward to this.
Danni watches from the hatch to the airlock as Misha fastens and locks the parts of the space suit, checks the connections to the hands and feet, and eventually pulls out the helmet to put it over Jensen's head.
“Wait,” Danneel interrupts them, then floats down towards the two of them.
Jensen looks at her, then at Misha, then back at her in confusion. Only when she smiles and leans in to give him a quick kiss on his cheek, Jensen knows. He just knows.
“For good luck,” she beams with her arms wrapped around his neck.
“Thanks,” Jensen ducks his head.
“Take care and return to us in one piece, alright? We need you here, Ackles,” she winks over her shoulder, then pulls herself out of the airlock by a handrail.
Misha smirks.
“Stop that, please,” Jensen begs him with a pained expression. To say he's not thrilled by the current change in things would be an understatement.
“Aw, come on. It's sweet,” Misha says, nudging Jensen into the side of his space suit.
Jensen doesn't feel a thing, and he doesn't want to talk about it until he's had the peace of mind to think about all of this. Rushing into things, one way or the other, is never good, never Jensen's favorite way.
So he just shakes his head, lets Misha do what he needs to do. Then the helmet closes, he's switched to onboard power and oxygen, and that's it for the next ten hours. The suit makes Jensen feel like the marshmallow man.
He waits in the airlock, listens to Misha giving commands via the intercom, wallows in his thoughts.
Only a sharp, “Airlock open!” breaks him out of his stupor.
Because right there, in front of him, are millions of stars, the unreachable depths of space, and the blue, blue earth high above him. It's breathtaking.
Jensen pushes off the metal airlock and drifts out into space, stares and wonders. The ISS looks impressive and enormous from here, but it seems to stay still as Jensen takes it all in.
He's completely and utterly in awe at the magnificent sight of the ISS, flying high over the ever spinning earth. This moment, Jensen knows, will change his life forever.
“Jensen, you in there?” Misha's amused, tinny voice interrupts Jensen's thoughts.
“I... yeah. I mean, confirmed.”
Misha laughs. “I see. Now, as we discussed, Osric will get the robotic arm to your position, and you just need to hop on. Alright?”
“Positive,” Jensen nods to himself, then drifts towards the Canadarm2, named after the robotic arms of the Space Shuttles, which in turn were named after their Canadian producer.
Jensen finishes his mission - minor repairs on the outside of the station, and the installment of a biomagnetic scanner - which means he has basically ten hours to stew in his own juices, without anyone to talk to.
And by god, does he stew in his juices.
The thing is, Jensen knows Danneel is crushing on him. Has suspected it for a while now. But as much as he likes her, he can't do this. Not here, not like this, maybe not ever. Jensen also knows he shouldn't lead her on.
Which makes him think of Monica and dear lord, he is not in the mood for this shit again. Plus, it's not fair to Danneel, since she doesn't know the premise of his problems.
The premise that means Jensen won't ever date someone from his workplace ever again.
And the image of Monica glaring at him is as far as he allows the memory to cloud his vision.
***
After the airlock is pressurized and the inner door swings open, Jensen finds both Misha and Danneel grinning at him.
They pull him into the station and while Misha starts to loosen his helmet, Danneel goes to detach the lower half of his suit from the upper, all the while smiling ten-megawatt-smiles. Both of them.
“I'm happy to see you, too,” Jensen coughs when he's free, more joke than innuendo.
“I bet,” Danneel snorts, then leans forward to help Misha with the upper part of Jensen's spacesuit. She's right there, right in his personal space, looking hopeful and so hot that Jensen feels his body react and want and god, no. Just no.
“Danni, you and I need to talk,” Jensen presses out between clenched teeth.
Her face falls, but Jensen tries to ignore it. Without success.
“Alright, dinner's in half an hour,” Misha says with a heavy tone before he leaves them alone.
“Jen?” Danni prompts, her head tilted to the side, looking curious and like she's bracing herself for the words that are to come.
“Danni,” Jensen starts, deliberate and slow, locking eyes with her. “I know what's happening here. I know what's happening to you and believe me, I'm not unaffected either. But--” he takes a deep breath and shakes his head. “It's not gonna happen. I'm sorry, I am, and it's not you, it's me. Mixing work with pleasure, it's never ended well for me, and I promised myself I wouldn't let it happen again. Especially here, canned up at the station. So will you do me the favor and just... be my friend?”
Danneel's posture has fallen during Jensen's little speech, but she nods without looking at him. “I guess I can do that.”
“Because I really like you, I do,” Jensen tries to reassure her and places both hands onto her shoulders. She's shaking, and Jensen really wants to hug her, but he also doesn't want to give her the wrong idea.
“Yeah, I... me too,” she stutters, then looks up at him with a sad, tiny smile. Then she reaches out to pull him into her arms, and it's alright.
“That's it, we're good?”
Danneel nods against his shoulder. “We're good.”
***
The first few days after that are awkward. Since everybody noticed what was going on, everybody also walks on eggshells around them for a while.
When they work in Columbus, Jensen tries to keep up a normal conversation, but Danneel seems hesitant towards him. It takes her a bit to fall back into their usual friendly banter, but once she comes around, everything is back to normal.
One evening, when they're lounging around in the Unity module, watching the remake of “Friday the 13th”, everybody drifting around lazily, Danneel ends up with her arms around Jensen. The thing is, it's just for comfort. Some human touch in this warped reality feels good for both of them, and they indulge in it, until Misha jumps into their arms and declares it group cuddle time.
Osric is almost choked in the middle of all of them and Mark almost smashes the laptop on the wall, but other than that, everything is fine. Plus, they can't stop laughing for a good ten minutes.
And it's alright.
After a few more weeks, Jensen's hair has grown out enough to need some trimming at the sides and at the back of his head, and Danneel is once again the one to cut it for him.
She jokes and laughs and gently pats his head afterwards and it's all so normal that Jensen has all but forgotten about her unrequited crush.
“You know,” Misha startles Jensen later that day, when he's sitting in Cupola and watching the earth. “You'd have made a cute couple.”
Jensen shakes his head. “Thanks, but... it doesn't matter. It's better this way.”
“You're not secretly gay or something?” Misha nudges him with a mischievous grin as he sits against one of the handlebars in the observation deck. The question makes Jensen quite flustered, since it's Misha - with his sharp blue eyes and a set of very kissable lips.
“Actually, I'm bisexual,” Jensen smiles lopsided.
Misha nods, the grin still firmly in place. “That so,” he says.
Jensen shrugs. “Still, it doesn't matter. There are some things you shouldn't do in a workplace that you can't leave for the next six months.”
“It's only one more week for Dee,” Misha replies. “Then she's going home.”
“Yeah.”
“I'll miss her,” Misha sighs.
“Me too,” Jensen nods.
Misha assesses him with a sharp look, half serious, half teasing. “As a friend, or...?”
“As a friend,” Jensen hurries to say.
“A-huh.”
With one eyebrow raised high on his forehead, Jensen turns fully towards him. “Listen, are you trying to play matchmaker here? Because if you are, I'd rather you didn't.”
“No,” Misha denies a bit too quickly, then hesitates at Jensen's critical gaze. “Okay, yeah, a bit. It's just... you're my friends. I'd like to see you happy. And why deny yourself a good thing when it's right in front of you?”
“There are reasons, alright? Let's just leave it at that.”
“Whatever you say,” Misha raises his hands defensively. “Just wanted to ask.”
Jensen turns away and looks at Australia flying by.
“So, crew changeover in a week,” Jensen says. “You heard anything yet?”
“Yes, I did,” Misha nods. “Two guys, one woman. The names are Genevieve and Jared, the third one is some tourist who'll stay with us for three days, then go back home with Yuri and Dee.”
Jensen nods. “So what do they do?”
“Genevieve Cortese is from France. You two will have a lot to do with each other, since she's a microbiologist, just like Dee. Jared Padalecki hails from the US and is an astrophysicist. Both are about our age.”
“And our tourie?”
“You don't want to know,” Misha says and rolls his eyes. “Just prepare for a lot of screaming and excited what's-this-and-what's-thats.”
Jensen laughs. “Relax, Mish, it's gonna be fine.”
“Says you.”
“Yep,” Jensen slaps his hand onto Misha's shoulder, then heads for the dinner table.
***
On June 18th, 2015, the Soyuz TMA-18M mission starts from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. It's the 127th manned mission of the Russian space program.
On board of the Soyuz ship are a microbiologist, an astrophysicist and a space tourist. The launch of the rocket is as uneventful as it gets - everything works as expected, and the Soyuz capsule docks onto the service module of the ISS on June, 19th.
The crew of the ISS head for the hatch to welcome their three new passengers, and for the upcoming three days, the station will be crowded. Mostly, they're happy to see new faces. So when the hatch to the Soyuz opens, Misha - as their commander - first helps out their tourist, some rich guy from California that no one's ever heard of. Genevieve is a tiny person, barely reaches Jensen's shoulder, but her smile is wide and her handshake is firm.
“Dr. Ackles, I assume?” she asks while hugging him.
“Jensen is fine, Dr. Cortese,” he replies easily.
“Genevieve,” she offers, then laughs. “I guess we have to look out for the nicknames people call us by. If it's Gen and Jen, we're gonna have a problem.”
“Nah, most people just call me Jensen. Except for Misha.”
“Misha?”
“Commander Krushnic. No one calls him that,” Jensen chuckles and points at Misha, who just finished welcoming their tourist.
Genevieve nods and moves on to him.
However, nothing could've prepared Jensen for what was to come.
Behind Genevieve, a guy roughly about double the size of Genevieve makes his way through the hatch. Jensen takes in the thick, muscular arms, broad shoulders, and a shoulder-to-waist-ratio to die for. Still, the whole picture is ruined by brown hair that would've been shoulder-length under normal gravitation, but now stands up in all directions, floating in zero-g.
Jensen bites the inside of his cheek so he doesn't start laughing.
“Hey! Nice to meet you. I'm Jared,” the guy says and holds out his hand for Jensen to shake.
It's a big hand with thick fingers that dwarfs Jensen's when it wraps around his fingers. Then he gets engulfed by those huge hands and strong arms and is trying not to let on how swept off his feet he feels.
“Jensen,” he manages to get out, feeling flustered. “Nice to meet you, too. You, uh. Might wanna tie your hair together.”
“What?” Jared says shocked, then reaches up to see what's up with his hair, and his face falls when he notices. “Oh. I look like I stuck my finger into a power socket, don't I.”
It's not a question, and Jensen can't help but start laughing this time. It bubbles right out of him, unstoppable and gleeful, and Jared falls into it after a second's hesitation.
“Here,” Danneel says from beside Jensen, and holds up an elastic hair band to Jared. “By the way, hi, I'm Danneel.”
“Thank you, Danneel, you are my savior,” Jared tries to bow to her as much as floating in space allows him, but eventually just hugs her hello, too, then takes the proffered hair band. After taming his hair, Jared sports an adorable stubby ponytail on the back of his head.
It looks kind of cute, and Jensen finds himself snorting out another laugh.
That's when Jared's hazel-blue-something eyes lock with his, an amused spark in them, plus something that makes Jensen's mouth go dry. They share a smile that seems too intimate for two guys who just met, and Jensen already feels a connection to Jared.
“Glad to have you on board,” Danneel throws in from beside them, her eyes flicking from Jared to Jensen and back, and Jensen might have imagined it, but her smile seems a tad bit sad now.
The moment is interrupted - and thank god for that - by Osric, who bursts right through Danneel and Jensen and jumps into Jared's arms.
“Jay!” he shouts in delight. “Man, it's good to see you!”
Jared laughs as he pats Osric's back. “Os, I'm glad to have ya back, too, but man, you’re gonna make'em think we're a couple or something.”
“Aren't we?” Osric grins and kisses Jared's cheek before they both burst into hysterical laughter.
Jensen watches the whole exchange somewhat baffled and surprised.
When Jared's eyes land on him again, he clears his throat, feeling embarrassed at being caught staring.
“Osric and I went to college together,” Jared explains with a wink.
“I see,” Jensen smiles to relieve the tension in the air, even though he has no idea where that just came from. “Hey, how about we take you on the tour? And where's Genevieve, she can come with, too.”
“She's off with Misha and whatshisface, probably doing just that,” Danneel shrugs.
So they show Jared around the station. He seems to soak up all the information he's given like a sponge, asking little things here and there, but generally looking like a kid on a school trip, wide-eyed and in awe. Jensen lets Danni and Osric do most of the talking and just follows them around.
Jared becomes quiet after about half an hour. His face is a lot paler than what seems healthy.
“Jared, are you alright?” Jensen asks him with a hand on his shoulder.
Jared shakes his head no.
“Let me guess, feeling sick?”
That gets another shake, yes, and Jensen doesn't need to see it to open a rack a few feet down the wall, pull out a barf bag and hand it to Jared. Jared immediately empties his stomach into it.
Osric pats Jared's back to soothe him while Jensen keeps up a running commentary. “It's pretty common, you know, your stomach's not used to your food flying around in there. A lot of people get sick when they come up here. I mean, Osric for example, he had that problem for three days until he could keep anything down. It'll pass, you'll get used to it.”
Jared finishes throwing up his lunch from before the rocket launch and wipes his mouth with the paper towel attached to the plastic bag. He eyes the construction of it, confused, until Jensen takes it from his hands, stuffs the paper towel in and ziplocks the bag.
“That goes into the wet trash and then into the next Progress,” he states unceremoniously. “You feeling better? Need some water?”
“Yes please,” Jared says, then clears his throat.
Danneel grabs for a plastic water bag that they stash beside the food cupboard and flicks it towards Jensen. Jensen busies himself by quickly filling it with some water from the dispenser, then explains how the straw works to Jared, even though he probably knows that already.
“You gotta lock the bag or else you'll have water everywhere soon,” Jensen pushes the button on the straw. “See? Now it's open.”
Jared takes a few sips, then chuckles. “Embarrassing myself not even thirty minutes after arriving, that's typical for me.”
“Don't worry about it, we all had our moments,” Osric consoles him. “I mean, Jensen managed to spill spinach all over the service module a couple days after we got here. That was messy. Also hilarious.”
“And they let me clean everything by myself after they stopped laughing at me,” Jensen grumbles and glares at Osric. “Spinach is a bitch to get out of velcro, lemme tell ya.”
Jared eyes him curiously. “You're from Texas, right?”
Jensen nods and grins at him, because he's done his research, too. “Raised in Dallas, now living in Austin. And you're from Austin, too.”
“Oh God,” Danneel sighs overly dramatic. “That can't end well.”
Jared's eyes find Jensen's, and for a few seconds, they share a long look at each other.
“Y'all'll hafta get used to it,” Jared drawls with a lazy grin.
Jensen is suddenly, inexplicably hard in his pants, but tries to ignore that fact without success.
***
The first night is a bit cramped, what with three of them having to sleep in provisional beds - sleeping bags placed in convenient nooks and crannies - and Jensen is glad that he's got his bunk.
When his alarm clock wakes him at 7 a.m., Jensen forces himself out into the silence of the station. He likes to be the first one with coffee in his hands, in order to not be the 'breakfast grinch' - Danneel's words, not his.
So when Jensen does the zero-g equivalent of dragging his feet towards the Unity module, the last thing he expects to see is anyone else already up, much less Jared taking his daily sponge bath in the Tranquility module. Completely naked.
Jensen promptly pushes himself away from the table to float backwards and look into the adjoining module.
“Jared?” he asks, his voice still raspy.
Which makes Jared look, then turn around and Jensen ends up with Jared full-frontal before breakfast and before his first coffee.
“Morning, Jensen!” Jared smiles as if he isn't just giving Jensen an eyeful.
“Why are you naked?” Jensen manages to cough.
Jared meets his inquiring gaze with an innocent shrug. “'cause I'm washing up.”
“Why... now?”
“Just finished my workout, so I didn't want to sit at breakfast all sweaty, is all.”
Jensen points at the toilet cabin right beside Jared. “We got a thing for that, y'know.”
“Misha's been in there for like half an hour,” Jared explains with a roll of his eyes, then focuses back on Jensen. “Hey, I'm sorry, it's not like I don't have any modesty, but it was gross and I figured... this is all a bit like camp back in school, but we're all adults and all that.”
“Yeah, probably, I mean,” Jensen stutters, then shakes his head. “Nothing I haven't seen before, but... I just wanna... what if one of the girls sees you. You don't want to give them the wrong idea, y'know.”
“I guess not,” Jared agrees with a sudden, easy smile and turns away to wrap a towel around his slim hips.
Jensen doesn't stare. He swallows down any comment on the matter and leaves to get himself a nice big bag of hot, strong coffee.
Still, his day is still very much compromised by that image, in a not entirely bad way.
***
The Soyuz is loaded, the crew is in their pressure suits, and it's time to say goodbye.
Not that anyone is sad to see Bryan, resident space tourist and a pain in their ass, leave, and he does so with a handshake for everyone.
Saying goodbye to Yuri and Danneel, however, is a lot harder.
Yuri gives Jensen a one-harmed hug with a friendly pat on the back. “Take care,” is all he says, in his typical accent, his eyes shining a bit glassily. They've become good friends over the past months.
“You too,” Jensen answers, and then there's Danneel, right in front of him.
Without hesitating, he hugs her tight, and if she clings to his neck for a moment too long. Jensen doesn't mind.
“So, what if I asked you,” she starts with an embarrassed smile and a blush high on her cheeks, talking quietly so it's only between the two of them. “If you wanted to see me again when you're back home. Would this, us, still be off limits?”
It almost breaks Jensen's heart to nod, but he squeezes her hand in apology. “I'm sorry.”
“It's alright,” Danneel mutters. “Well, I couldn't go without asking. I'd have hated myself if I didn’t.”
“I understand,” Jensen insists, feeling heartbroken for her.
Danneel smiles sadly at him, then wraps both arms around his neck and kisses his cheek. Jensen lets her, just cradles her in his arms and lets his hand run down her ponytail.
She chuckles. “Stop that. Go play with Jared's ponytail or something.”
“Maybe I will,” Jensen answers, can't help but shoot her a last, fond smile as he sees her companions take their place in the Soyuz. On impulse, he leans down and kisses her forehead. “Have a safe trip, Commander Harris.”
Danneel tips her imaginary hat and disappears into the space ship.
“You want to do the honors?” Misha asks from beside Jensen, the old ship bell in his hand.
Jensen takes it with a grateful nod and rings them off.
***
“Hey,” Jared says when he interrupts Jensen's daily observation routine in Cupola. “You alright?”
“Yeah,” Jensen answers, lost in thought.
“You miss her, I know, but... we're gonna get back down there one day, too.”
“Sure, but she was my friend, you know.”
Jared nods. “Um, can I ask... no, forget it,” he mumbles, then rubs his huge palm over his face.
“What? Spit it out. Can't start a sentence like that and not finish it,” Jensen prompts him with a smile.
“I... Are you sure? It's pretty personal,” Jared tries to derail the conversation.
“Try me.”
Jared takes a deep breath, his chest expanding and deflating in a manner that shouldn't be as sexual as it seems. Not that Jensen has had much interest in his own gender lately, but he can appreciate a good-looking guy. And God, does he appreciate Jared.
“I wanted to ask if there was... I mean, it seemed like you two, were like, you know.”
“Oh, we weren't,” Jensen denies quick as a shot. He thought as much. “I mean, there were feelings. It was a problem, because at first she thought we could and I thought that this is not the place, so. No, we weren't.”
Jared nods, his eyes not having shifted from Jensen at all. Then he lets out a deep sigh.
Jensen has no idea what to think of any of it.
***
Genevieve and Jared settle in soon enough.
To Jensen's complete and utter joy, they brought an espresso machine up to the ISS during their mission, so he can drink actual coffee for the first time in over three months. It doesn't look like an espresso machine at all, since it's been converted to work in a zero-g environment, but it does brew some of the most delicious coffee Jensen has ever had.
He's not ashamed to let out a moan that borders on pornographic after his first sip.
“Wow, that good?” Jared chuckles and nudges Jensen's side. His grin is warm and friendly and Jensen returns it from the bottom of his heart.
“I'm in heaven,” Jensen sighs.
“Literally.”
“Yes. You should try it, it's really good coffee,” Jensen points at the machine that Osric currently occupies.
“Oh, I'm sure, judging by your groan just now,” Jared replies, a cheeky wink marking the tease as such.
Jensen feels his cheeks go warm and turns away. “Anyway, I'm... I'll see you in the lab!”
He's fleeing, he knows it, even though he can't put his finger on what he's fleeing from.
***
A week later, Jensen is on the line with NASA when the director interrupts.
A too-familiar voice sounds through the speakers of his laptop. “Mr. Jones wants to speak to Dr. Ackles,” it says. “I'll put him through.”
Jensen winces and rubs his hand over his eyes, then shakes the weird feeling off. No time for that now.
“Mr. Jones,” he greets the director, nodding his head.
The NASA director looks as serious and sour as always as he looks into the camera. “Mr. Ackles, good to see you. I hear everything is fine after the crew changeover?”
“Positive, Sir.”
“Good. Because I have a proposition to make, one I think you'll like.”
Jensen nods, then waits for the few seconds of lag that always draw out conversations with ground control.
“As one of our PR events, I'd like you to do a weekly Q & A with students from all over the earth. It's going to be live and unscripted,” Jones explains. “You're also free to do your own videos to fill in the gaps, of course. It's all a test to make our YouTube channel more attractive.”
Jensen nods again.
“Now, you don't have to do these alone. Choose a partner, someone you cooperate with on a daily basis and have good faith in. Also someone who complements both your character and your scientific field. We want this to be entertaining.”
Jensen mentally goes through their whole crew. Another biologist, like Gen, is out of the question. A technology genius like Osric would be fun, but Jensen can't imagine running a long-time series of videos with him. Osric is too much like him in that sense, very logical and scientific in his thinking. Misha is a mission specialist, which is a good load of astronomical knowledge and some technology and engineering. Jensen likes him, a lot, but isn't sure that their videos wouldn't end up as a total trainwreck. Nothing he could present to the NASA.
And Mark... he just doesn't have much in common with the mathematics professor.
Jared it is. Astrophysicist and funny, which is kind of perfect.
“I choose Jared Padalecki,” Jensen announces, and Jones confirms it with a nod.
“First chat is scheduled for the day after tomorrow. We got a high school from Colorado that's excited as hell.”
“Will the questions be monitored in any way?” Jensen inquires.
“No. Just try to answer honestly and genuinely. They're kids, what could possibly go wrong?”
***
“First Q & A with J & J,” Jared would bounce on his feet if he could, and Jensen finds himself thinking that it's kind of endearing.
If Jared wasn't six-foot-four and a grown-ass man, that is.
“Hey, that rhymes,” Jared seems to only have picked that up three seconds after saying it aloud.
“Let's go with that,” Jensen nods at him. “Sounds awesome. Alright, so we're online in a few.”
“Jen?” Jared prompts, turning towards him to offer his fist. “Let's do this.”
Jensen bumps it like they're both five-year-olds, complete with an exploding motion.
“Hello, station,” the communication officer's voice interrupts them. “You're online.”
“Hello,” Jared waves at the camera.
“Do you hear me?”
Jensen nods. “We hear you loud and clear.”
“Nice fistbump, by the way,” the guy chuckles.
“Oh, was that already...” Jared drifts off and scratches the back of his neck.
“Online, yeah. Don't worry. It's a good introduction. Say hello to the sophomore class of James Woods high school, Colorado!”
Thirty excited faces grin at them from the ranks of NASA's auditorium.
“Hi guys!” Jared grins back and Jensen waves. “My name is Dr. Jared Padalecki, I'm from Austin, Texas--”
“And I'm Dr. Jensen Ackles, also from Austin, Texas,” Jensen finishes his sentence and doesn't feel half as dorky as he probably should. “Today, we got about an hour for you to ask us all the questions you always wanted to ask about life in space.”
“So have at it! We're ready!” Jared adds and lets the microphone drift in front of them.
“Hello, my name is Michael and I'm sixteen. I'd like to know how you don't lose anything on board the ISS?”
“Good question,” Jensen nods, then points at code on the side of their microphone. “See this? That's a barcode. And here--” he reaches upwards and pulls the scanner from the ceiling, “is the barcode scanner. So wherever we take something from one end of the station to the other, we scan it so we know where it is.”
“It’s awesome,” Jared says, grabbing the mike with his huge hand sprawled out over Jensen's smaller one, “Because some of us are prone to losing stuff so this really comes in handy.”
“By which you mean yourself,” Jensen teases to cover his own, sudden nervousness at having Jared so close to him, practically holding hands in front of a room full of teenagers.
Jared shrugs and grins at him, wide and carefree, the kind of grin that makes Jensen forgive him anything, even eating the last of his favorite dried spaghetti.
After the next couple questions - about showering in space and how they get their movies and what they eat for breakfast - it gets easier. Jensen feels himself loosen up in Jared's presence, which isn't hard, even though Jared easily occupies half the space they have, standing beside each other in Columbus. It anchors Jensen, in a way, makes him feel safe, like he could always hide behind Jared's taller frame if need be.
Jared gestures and he grins and flips around if necessary to explain stuff, and Jensen is really glad to have chosen him, because Jared is thriving on this experience.
One of the questions is, when and how they decided to become astronauts.
“Well,” Jensen starts. “That's a long story. Obviously, we're scientists first and foremost, but back when I was little, I was completely infatuated with the Space Shuttle program. I watched every start and tracked the missions--”
Jared interrupts him with a laugh. “Man, me too! I was so sad when they retired the fleet, I really wanted to fly with one of the shuttles.”
“Yeah, and you see,” Jensen grins, then continues towards the camera, “We grew up in Texas. The Lyndon B. Johnson Space Center in Houston isn't far, so of course we were there as kids. It was fascinating, seeing the old Saturn and Apollo rockets. And back then, the Space Shuttle program was brand new and exciting.”
It ends with them gushing about the Space Shuttles for at least ten minutes and in the end grinning at each other. Jensen files it under the long list of things that they have in common.
“Do you have any candy in space?” a girl wants to know next, and Jared is already opening his mouth when Jensen interrupts him.
“Do I have candy? Yes. Do I get to eat it? No. The second Jared sees candy, it's gone,” he mock-glares at Jared beside him.
“Hey, I apologized for eating your rainbow twizzlers, but c'mon, they were rainbow twizzlers,” Jared emphasizes, grabbing Jensen's shoulder on instinct.
“And I'm just teasing,” Jensen replies with a wink.
“Right.”
Jensen lifts his chin to look at Jared, access him, take him all in. Not a good idea in front of a camera, he notices, because those eyes are pulling him in and never letting him go.
“Anyway,” Jared breaks their moment with an amused spark in his eyes. “Yes, we have candy. It's called bonus food, and we get it in boxes with the Progress or Dragon supply ships. Those are unmanned vehicles which are launched by Soyuz rockets from Kazakhstan or with a Falcon-9 rocket from the US, and they bring us supplies on a regular basis.”
Jensen nods. “So our family can send us our favorite chocolate, for example. And you can't eat it all at once, since then you won't have any for the next couple months, like we won't have any rainbow twizzlers on board until the next supplies arrive.”
“Now I'm feeling bad,” Jared pouts, then wraps both arms around Jensen from the side. “I'm sorry, Jen.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Jensen pats his back, but can't help but smile. “I'll just hide them better next time.”
“You do that.”
“Now lemme go, sasquatch,” Jensen laughs, and Jared pulls back to share a heartfelt smile with him. He's close, almost too close, their noses almost in range to - and Jensen makes his brain lose the train of thought. He's not going there.
Jared has the audacity to still pout and make puppy dog eyes at him. “But I'm sorry.”
“I know. It's alright, no big deal.”
“Candy is always a big deal. I'll make it up to you.”
“By letting me go?”
Jared drops his hands and grins first at Jensen, then into the camera.
Jensen thinks that maybe this whole thing was a good idea, but he's not fully decided yet. He also doesn't know when the lack of personal space around Jared stopped bothering him.
Masterpost | Chapter 2 >>