Fic: On Dark Roads
This was originally written for 
.
Title: On Dark Roads
Spoilers: season 6, with specific references to Patient X/TRATB
Category: XRA
Keywords: M/S UST, AU.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: I wondered what he would do if I told him that I wanted to remove the chip. I wasn't even sure if that was the truth, if that was what I wanted.
Disclaimer: I do not own Mulder or Scully, nor do I intend to make money off them.
Archive: Sure, but please ask first.
Author's Note: This is my first fic that has more than a passing reference to the mytharc. I hope it worked out decently well!
Also, thanks are owed to both amalnahurriyeh and belsum for their helpful comments and suggestions.
~~~~~~~~
I woke up slowly to a pounding headache. Whatever I was lying on was hard and uncomfortable, but there was something soft over me, keeping most of me warm. My entire body ached, not just my head. I tried to sit up to find out what had happened.
Immediately, a gentle but firm hand on my shoulder stopped me - Mulder. I opened my mouth. “Mul-”
Before the name completely left my lips, Mulder's hand had moved to them from my shoulder. He shook his head. Then he slowly took his hand away, and helped me to sit up.
I was still wanting to know what was going on, but I did look around before trying to speak again. We seemed to be inside a cave. There was a blanket over me, and a somewhat inexpertly-fashioned bandage covering my left forearm. Mulder was crouched next to me (the ceiling of the cave looked to be not quite tall enough for him to stand) with an anxious expression and a large bruise on his face. Based on the light coming in from the mouth of the cave, it was either early morning or relatively late evening.
I opened my mouth to ask where we were, and Mulder quickly held up a hand and shook his head again. Frustrated, I raised my eyebrow and looked at him, communicating my need for information, and fast.
Mulder held up one finger - Wait - and disappeared further into the cave for a few seconds. He came back holding a bottle of water and a notepad with a pen. I drank the water gratefully as Mulder quickly wrote a few lines. Then I waited. After a moment, he handed me the notepad.
We're in Virginia, in the middle of nowhere. I followed you last night. Your chip again. Those words seemed to stand out more than the rest. The ship crashed, maybe shot down. Faceless aliens still looking for survivors and witnesses.
I stared at the page, then slowly reached my hand up to the back of my neck. I winced as I encountered a bruise slightly below it. Then I swallowed. Had it really happened again? I cast my mind back to my last memory before writing a response to Mulder.
I don't remember coming here, I told him. Even writing this down shook me. Last thing I remember is the hotel in Richmond, and our case. I hesitated, then continued, What happened to me? Then I crossed out the last word and wrote “us”.
Mulder took the paper and read it. He looked at me and then looked down hastily, clearly ashamed. The pen scratched over the paper for a few more seconds before I got my answer.
You didn't want to come with me. I had to almost drag you away. It was dark - I couldn't see where we were going very well.
I put down the notepad and took his hand. As much as I was disquieted by this revelation, I knew we both needed comfort right now. He held my hand, but still refused to meet my eyes. Then a thought struck me, and I reached up with my other hand to the bruise on Mulder's face. At my light touch, Mulder winced, but looked at me with a tiny rueful smile and nod.
My mouth dropped open. I had done this to him? I had absolutely no memory of any of this, and it was almost impossible for me to get my mind around the idea that I had been so determined to stay at the site of the ship that I had injured Mulder when he was trying to keep me safe.
Mulder's smile widened, and he took my hand away from his face, enfolding it in his own. It was his turn to reassure his partner, and I saw in his eyes no hint of blame, only infinite relief and tenderness - the same expression, in fact, that I remembered seeing on his face when I had woken in the hospital after Ruskin Dam.
After meeting his gaze for a few more moments, I returned his smile. Then I gently disengaged my hands from his and picked up the notepad again. Supplies?
Mulder nodded, comprehension clear on his face, and he stood up (as far as was possible for him) to move to the back of the cave again. He returned carrying two small bags - both his overnight bag and mine - and a first aid kit that I recognized as the one from my trunk. He set them down next to me, then shrugged. This was it, apparently.
I was about to reach for my bag when I froze. The sound of running footsteps outside the cave was clearly audible, and it sounded like they were getting closer.
Silently, I met Mulder's alarmed expression, then stood up as quietly and carefully as I could. Bringing the blanket with me, I hurried farther back into the cave with him, trying to ignore the dizziness that threatened to overwhelm me as I did so. I knew that if this incident had affected me anything like the last time, I really needed to be lying down until my blood pressure was back to normal. But I wasn't about to lie there helplessly and wait for Mulder to move me out of harm's way - especially since that would put both of us at more risk of being discovered by whoever was coming.
The footsteps kept getting closer, and I bit back a groan as I saw that I had left the pen and notepad behind in my attempt to hide. Next to me, Mulder suddenly gripped my shoulder - he had seen the objects as well. They would not be visible from a cursory glance inside the cave... but there was no guarantee that whoever was approaching would not look more closely, especially if it was one of the faceless creatures.
Whoever it was stopped right outside the entrance to the cave. I held my breath. Though I still had no clear memories of that night at Ruskin Dam, I did vividly remember hearing the horror in my own voice as I had recounted under hypnosis the actions of the men without faces.
The sound of ragged breathing became audible just as a figure ducked partially into the cave. It was a man, youngish-looking, with a panicked expression visible on his profile even though he was facing out of the cave. I relaxed fractionally. At least he clearly had a face.
The young man had not noticed the other occupants of the cave yet. I looked at Mulder. Should we make him aware of our presence?
Before we could decide, the man let out something that sounded like a gasp and a scream, and dashed out of the cave as fast as he could. In seconds, the screams started up again, much louder and more agonized, and I closed my eyes. I could smell charred flesh, and then the screams ceased.
Just as quickly, I opened my eyes again. There was nothing stopping the... alien, if that's really what it was, from checking if there was anyone else in its victim's hiding spot. Mulder reached for his gun, as he had when the man had been approaching. I wished futilely that I had been in any kind of mental state to bring my own.
We waited in silence for what seemed like an eternity. No further sounds came from outside, after the victim's screams had faded. Finally, Mulder met my eyes, then crept forward cautiously, still with his weapon at the ready. He peered around the edge of the opening. After a few seconds, he moved so that he could see more. I held my breath again - but then Mulder holstered his gun and turned around. His posture was relaxed.
Apparently, my relief at our narrow escape was enough to make my vertigo increase, with the result that I nearly fell down instead of sitting. In an instant, Mulder was at my side, carefully lowering me to the cave floor and trying to position me as comfortably as possible as I lay down. His hand brushed across my left arm in this process, and the pain caused me to flinch and hold back a cry.
Mulder stopped moving and bit his lip, then resumed covering me with the blanket. His eyes were apologetic as he looked at me.
I shook my head slightly, and winced at the discomfort that motion produced. The dizziness had started to fade until that ill-thought moment. I closed my eyes again, willing the world to stop spinning.
After a few moments, I felt something soft beside my face, and I reluctantly opened my eyes to see that Mulder had folded up what looked to be a sweatshirt and was easing it under my head. Somehow, it made lying on the cold, uneven, rocky ground vastly more comfortable. I wanted to thank him, and at the same time I wanted to tell him to let me take care of myself. Instead, I just smiled at him briefly before closing my eyes yet again. Despite the fact that we were still in real and imminent danger, I was beginning to realize that I was in no shape to do anything but sleep right now. I could only hope that Mulder would take as good care of himself while I was resting as he was taking of me.
~~~
When I next woke, it took me a while to realize where I was. This was not helped by the fact that it was now darker outside, so there was even less visibility in the cave. When my eyes finally adjusted, I saw Mulder sitting watch near the entrance. I sat up carefully, and Mulder, noticing, made his way over to me.
“How are you feeling, Scully?” he whispered. He handed me the water bottle again.
I took stock. The dizziness was almost gone, and although I was still sore and stiff, it wasn't too bad. “Much better,” I whispered back. “Thank you.”
He smiled and nodded, and I took a drink from the water bottle. “How are you, Mulder?” I asked, handing it back and continuing to whisper.
“A little chilly,” he answered, “and in need of a hot shower and a meal, but other than that, I'm okay.” He sat down next to me. “It's been quiet since you went to sleep.”
I nodded (cautiously, this time). “I don't suppose cell phones get service out here?”
Mulder shook his head. “I did manage to call the Gunmen from the car on the way here, though. So they have a general idea of what I was doing.”
At that, I looked down. I still found it hard to think about the events that must have led us here. It hadn't even been very long since the first time the chip in my neck had taken away my will. How many more times was this going to happen before I was abducted again, or killed by the faceless men? How could I live with this constant specter of being 'called' at any time? And yet, the consequences of going without the chip were even more assuredly bleak.
Next to me, Mulder sighed, perhaps guessing at the turn of my thoughts. “I'm sorry, Scully.”
I could tell he wasn't just apologizing for the injuries I had incurred on the way here. No matter how many times I told him that I didn't blame him for the hardships in my life since I had joined the X-Files, I still don't think I have ever gotten him to believe that it isn't all his fault.
I decided to change the subject. “Any chance of something to eat?”
“Not a whole lot, unfortunately,” Mulder answered. He pulled over my overnight bag, and handed me a granola bar. “There are three more of those, and a Snickers and some sunflower seeds in my bag.”
“Have you eaten anything?” I asked as I unwrapped the bar.
He shook his head. “I'm not hungry.”
I frowned and gave him a look that he probably couldn't really see, as dark as it was in the cave. “Mulder, you're the one who has a gun and is physically well enough to defend both of us. You need to keep up your strength.”
Holding up his hands in surrender, Mulder scooted closer. “All right, if you insist, Dr. Scully.” He took one of the remaining granola bars, and we ate in silence.
As I finished the last bite of the meager meal, I suddenly began to feel uneasy. I dropped the wrapper on my blanket, shivering.
“What is it, Scully?”
I turned to him and opened my mouth, but found that I couldn't speak. The feeling of unease had grown into full-blown fear. A cloud of confusion and terror had descended over me, leaving me unable to do anything but raise a trembling hand to the back of my neck.
Dimly, I heard Mulder whisper urgently, “Scully, what's wrong? Talk to me, please!”
I met his eyes again. They're coming again, I wanted to tell him, but instead I grabbed onto his arms and pulled him close. This time, I would not be totally at the mercy of the chip.
Before Mulder could do more than wrap his arms around me in an attempt to reassure me, the cave shook as something passed by low to the ground. There was a rumbling, roaring sound that I was pretty sure wasn't only in my ears. Rocks and dirt rained down around us, but I barely noticed if any hit me. I was too busy gasping for breath and fighting in desperation against the terrifyingly strong urge to leave the cave. I'm sure I left bruises on Mulder as I clung to him.
The sound of the ship faded somewhat, but I knew it was still very close by - close enough that its pull was still strong. I was concentrating so hard on fighting it that it took me quite a while to notice that Mulder had lifted me entirely into his arms, onto his lap, and that he was whispering “Stay with me, Scully,” over and over.
After a length of time that was impossible to calculate, I loosened my grip on my partner fractionally. It seemed like the immediate danger might be passing. Maybe the ship was leaving. As rational thought began to return to me, I wondered why another ship had come to this same area. Wasn't it obvious to them that all their would-be abductees had just been killed by the... the other aliens, the rebels? Were they now trying to draw out the survivors? Or the rebels?
Mulder waited a few more minutes - or hours, it was still hard to tell - before relaxing his own grip somewhat. “Is it gone?” he asked, in such a faint whisper that I would not have heard him had we not been so close to each other. I could hear and feel his heart pounding.
I realized that I was still trembling, and I took a deep, slow breath to attempt to steady myself. “I - I think it's leaving,” I whispered back. At any rate, it was no longer calling me.
Slowly, we both allowed ourselves to calm down. I pulled away from him a little, and he took the opportunity to wrap the blanket around me again. It wasn't surprising that I was cold and shivering, I thought. I was probably going into shock. Perhaps realizing this as well, Mulder again pulled me to himself as soon as the blanket was around me.
Sighing, I curled up against him. I was exhausted by the effort of resisting the call, but I knew I wouldn't be sleeping any time soon. It had only been chance that I was awake this time when the ship had come, and although that meant that I hadn't lost my will entirely, it also meant I remained fully conscious of what would happen to me if I didn't fight it hard enough.
Despair started to set in as I pondered what would happen if the ship came again tonight. I was too tired to fight it anymore. Would I end up striking out at Mulder again while in the grip of the call? Would he have to knock me unconscious for my own safety? I swallowed, and closed my eyes.
“Scully, are you all right?” came Mulder's hesitant, soft query.
I almost laughed bitterly. Instead, I said the first thing that came to mind. “I don't think I can deal with this anymore, Mulder.”
He didn't answer right away. “What-- what do you mean?”
“I won't be awake or able to fight every time they call, and you can't be around to follow me every time, either,” I said. “One of these days...”
“No,” Mulder said, his tone hard and dangerously loud in volume. He tightened his grip on me for a second, and then continued in a quieter voice, “No, Scully, that's never going to happen. We'll figure something out.”
I sighed again. I knew he was already thinking of ways I could be guarded constantly - with help from the Gunmen, probably. But either way, I would no longer have even the illusion of independence or control over my own life. “Mulder, I don't want to be kept under constant guard, like... like some kind of rare artifact in a museum. I need to be able to live my life.”
It was his turn to sigh at that. “I know.”
He didn't offer any empty reassurances. I wondered what he would do if I told him that I wanted to remove the chip. I wasn't even sure if that was the truth, if that was what I really wanted. But part of me did. At least that way I would be in more control of when and how I died.
Trying to shake off those dark thoughts, I muttered, “I'm just so tired.”
“Sleep, Scully,” Mulder said. He smoothed the blanket across my back, and the message was clear: he would make sure I was still here in the morning.
~~~
My dreams that night were full of brief snatches of a bridge full of people, and being surrounded by screams as faceless men approached to destroy us all. Then another ship appeared above us, and I slowly raised my hands toward it with my companions. I felt a strong desire in my fogged mind that it would be me chosen to be taken this time, instead of Cassandra.
I awoke with a gasp. There was faint light coming in through the entrance of the cave, and I was still lying on Mulder's lap... or more accurately lying across his chest, since at some point in the night he had stretched out as much as he could on the cave floor. It sounded from his breathing like he must be asleep, but his arm was still comfortably tight across my shoulders.
For the first time in who knows how many hours, I smiled. I hoped he had decided to allow himself to sleep more than a few minutes ago. He certainly needed it, since this whole unplanned excursion had been robbing him of rest for several nights now.
As I looked at him in the gray light of early morning, Mulder stirred and opened his eyes. He smiled upon meeting mine, and dropped his arm away from my back. “Good morning, Scully.”
“It is,” I said quietly. “I'm still here.”
He nodded, looking at me seriously.
“Thank you.”
“You're welcome.”
We both sat up. I was still stiff and more than slightly sore, and glancing down at my bandaged arm reminded me that it was probably time to change the dressing. There was no dizziness, however.
“Feeling any better?” he inquired, still keeping his voice low.
I nodded. “I think so. I want to change this bandage, though.”
Mulder reached over for the first aid kit and pulled it toward us, groaning as he stretched his own sore muscles. “I could really go for that hot shower right about now,” he remarked.
“That does sound good.” I found the bandages, took them out, and turned my attention to removing the old bandage on my arm. I could feel Mulder's eyes on me as I slowly took it off, biting my lip against the pain. The gash underneath was large but shallow. It didn't look like it would need stitches, but it was not entirely clotted. I used a small bit of our precious water to clean it as best as I could.
“Need any help?”
I was about to refuse, but then I thought better of it. “If you could hold this edge down, that would make it easier.”
With his help, I had a respectable bandage in a matter of seconds. Then we looked at each other for a moment, silent. It was time to think about the next step.
“I could do some reconnaissance,” Mulder offered. “See if there's anything moving out there.” He frowned. “Except you don't have your weapon with you.”
I shook my head and took a deep breath. “I'll be fine, Mulder. No one... nothing discovered this cave last night, and I'll move further inside.” I gathered up our meager supplies in preparation. “Otherwise, we'll just end up stuck in here for who knows how long, and we don't have enough food and water to last.”
Mulder sighed. He didn't like it, but he knew I was right. Finally, he stood up as far as he was able and walked over to the cave entrance. “I'll be back as soon as I can.”
“Be careful,” I whispered. I don't think I managed to hide my worry when I raised my eyes to meet his. Even as I wanted him to leave to see if it was safe, it was impossible not to fear that the ship would return while he was gone. If that happened, we would both be in terrible danger.
He nodded once, and slipped out of the cave.
~~~
As soon as he was gone, I kept my word and pulled myself and all of our belongings as far back into the cave as I could. It wasn't a terribly big cavern, so this did not amount to much movement. Still, at least I was less immediately visible upon entering it, I figured. After this was accomplished, all that was left for me to do was wait.
I settled down with my back against the cave wall. It would be good if I could sleep, I told myself, but I knew that my anxiety for my partner and for myself would most likely prevent this.
The day passed. It was hard to determine the length of time since I did not have a watch with me, but as the shadows began to lengthen, my worry increased. Whatever was causing Mulder to take so long, there was almost no way it could be good. This line of thinking made me feel queasy, but I made myself eat another granola bar and drink some water. I also did a few stretches and tried to walk around a little bit. Just in case Mulder comes back and we need to move quickly, I thought. My head ached again when I first stood up, but the pain didn't last long.
Having nothing else to occupy my mind, my thoughts returned continually to the last night's events. I could not stop myself from trying to figure out the reason that a ship would come to the same place again after the first one had been shot down - if it had been shot down. Was this simply a continuation of the conflict between the two factions, that we had heard about ? Was it a sign of some kind of escalation?
I realized then that I had been thinking about these things solely as they affected the larger picture, and carefully avoiding thoughts of how they would affect me. And Mulder. It was a defense mechanism of some kind, most likely. If I allowed myself to dwell on the personal implications... I shook my head. I did not want to go back to the dark thoughts I was having immediately after the last ship had come and gone.
The last of the light from outside faded slowly but surely. All had been quiet outside my hiding place since Mulder left, and cabin fever was beginning to set in, on top of my steadily-mounting fear. I had just decided to at least take a quick look when the sound of footsteps once again became audible nearby.
Heart pounding, I ducked as far back against the wall of the cave as I could. There was a boulder between me and the entrance, but it was an incomplete screen at best. My right hand gripped a large rock that I had found earlier; it wasn't much of a weapon, but it would have to do.
From my vantage point, I saw a face, instantly familiar despite the fading light, peer into the cave. “Scully?” he whispered. “I'm back. Are you here?”
My relief at seeing him was so great that I almost answered immediately - but then with a jolt I remembered a confrontation years ago, when a man that had looked exactly like Mulder had changed before my eyes into the figure of the bounty hunter. Mulder and I had settled on a safe word to use between us in case of another such situation... but I could not ask this man to use the word, as I would still be at his mercy if he were not Mulder. A rock was not the precision weapon I would need to fend off the bounty hunter's kind.
“Scully, where are you?” the man repeated. He crept a bit further inside.
Please, if it's you, say the safe word, Mulder, I thought, my heart starting to pound again. We hadn't reminded each other about it before he left, but if it were really him, he would know why I was staying hidden.
At that moment, a tiny fragment of rock under the one I was still holding was dislodged. The noise it made as it fell a few feet seemed magnified, and I looked up from behind the boulder - straight into the eyes of the man who looked like my partner. He was smiling, but it was a cold, satisfied smile. “There you are.”
Gasping, I inched backward until my back was flat against the cave wall. “Don't come any closer,” I warned, though I knew he had no reason to listen to me.
He started forward, remaining eerily silent. Frantically, I heaved the rock at him. It struck him square in the chest. It only halted him for a moment, and then he continued toward me. Even as I looked around for something else, anything that would even slow his progress, part of my mind wondered if it gave the bounty hunter some sadistic pleasure to retain Mulder's guise.
There was nothing around me to use as a weapon, and he was within a few steps of reaching me. I took a deep breath and stood up, willing myself to meet my fate without showing fear.
Suddenly, the crack of a gunshot broke the unnatural stillness, and I had just enough time to duck as the figure in front of me clutched at his throat. Green liquid began to hiss and bubble from the wound, and I hastily moved away and covered my face as he fell, shifted into his true form for a moment, and then began to dissolve.
I backed away from the caustic substance and almost ran into Mulder, who was still standing where he had fired the shot. “Scully, are you all right?” he asked, holstering his gun and looking at me in concern. “I would have warned you before I shot, but then he would have moved and I wouldn't have been able to hit the back of the neck.”
I could only stare at him. It didn't seem likely that this wasn't the real Mulder, but there was always the possibility...
“Oh, I'm sorry,” he said after a moment, remorseful. He quickly recited the safe word, and then added, “You know, I was thinking we should change that to 'Roswell.'”
That was definitely Mulder. I began to relax, as he once again asked if I was all right.
“Yeah,” I said, taking deep breaths to try to slow my racing heart. “I'm fine.” I looked at him, noting in the faint light from outside that there was a small cut above his right eye. “What about you?”
He exhaled slowly, turning his gaze back to the pool of green liquid that was now all that remained of the bounty hunter. “I've got a few more cuts and bruises. Nothing serious.”
“Do you think it's safe to leave?”
At this, he smiled wryly. “Well, it's obviously not safe to stay now, is it?”
I shook my head, and crossed my arms against the sudden cool wind. “Guess not.”
Mulder went to gather our supplies together, drawing back with a small cry of disgust when he found that the blood of the bounty hunter had gotten onto one of the duffel bags and ruined it. “I'm sorry I took so long. I didn't run into anyone or anything out there for most of the day,” he told me as he picked up the remaining supplies. “But then our friend here”- he gestured to the green liquid - “caught me by surprise near what I think was the crash site and knocked me out. I guess he must have tracked me back here while I was unconscious.”
I could hear the guilt creep into his tone as he related the last part. Sighing, I walked over to join him, and took the blanket he was holding out. “Mulder, he could have killed you when he found you earlier. I'm just glad you got here in time - and mostly in one piece.”
He didn't seem convinced, but he nodded finally. “Let's get out of here.”
We exited the cave. I contemplated wrapping the blanket around myself, but decided it might hinder my ability to move quickly and just held it under one arm, instead. The late evening air was not dangerously cold.
“Which direction are our cars?” I asked, as we made our way down the small hill outside the cave.
Mulder was heading to our right. “I'm not sure how far, but they're this way.”
I grimaced. The sky was now completely dark. Though I wanted to get out of here, I was not looking forward to trekking through unknown terrain at night to do so. Then I shook my head, and hurried to catch up to Mulder, who had pushed ahead. He had already had to do this, while somehow bringing his uncooperative partner along - and then he had managed to find a place where we could recover in relative safety. At least this time, I was following him willingly.
We made it through what seemed to be a ravine without too much stumbling or being hit in the face by branches. By unspoken agreement, we kept as quiet as possible, for fear of further pursuit.
At last, after what seemed like quite a long trek, I could see the rental car, in the middle of a field where I had apparently left it. It was only then that it occurred to me: as was usual on the type of case we'd been on, we had only rented one car. Where had Mulder gotten the car that was parked right behind our rental?
“Mulder,” I said quietly, as we approached the vehicles, “this is our rental car that I must have taken out here. So whose car is that?”
He turned to look at me for a moment, but I couldn't see his expression in the dark. “We can come back for the rental later,” he said. “I should get this car back to its owner as soon as possible.”
My mouth dropped open. “You stole it?”
“Borrowed it, Scully,” Mulder corrected, opening the back door and throwing in what he had been carrying. “Are you coming?” In the illumination of the car's domelight, he looked somewhat uncertain. “Or I guess-- if you're feeling well enough, you could follow me back in the rental.”
In other circumstances, I thought grimly, neither of us should be driving at all: he probably had a concussion from his earlier confrontation with the bounty hunter, and I was definitely not at my best health-wise, either. “I think the best idea would be for us to be in the same car,” I told him. “Just in case either of us are not as alert as we think.”
Mulder nodded. “Good idea.”
Within minutes, we were on our way back to civilization. I breathed a small sigh of relief as the field passed into the distance behind us - a relief that faded rapidly as I thought of the ship calling me out here all the way from our motel.
“Mulder,” I inquired, trying to keep my voice level, “do you know how many miles away from our motel we are?”
He squinted at the dashboard and calculated for a moment. “I'm not sure, but I think that field where you stopped is about twenty miles outside of Richmond. I guess we should both get checked out at a hospital when we get back to town, right?”
I nodded distractedly. Twenty miles. It had been a greater distance last time, I thought. It would be nice to have some idea of the range from which a 'call' could affect me... but then, since there was no way to predict where a ship would appear next, that still wouldn't help me avoid it. And this time, I hadn't even been having trouble sleeping for the nights leading up to the call - at least, not that I remembered. But on the other hand...
“Scully?”
I looked up quickly. By the sharper, alarmed tone of his voice, I guessed that he had already said my name at least once without getting a response. “What?”
He took a deep breath, his worry replaced by calmer concern. “How are you doing?”
Staring at my hands in my lap, I shrugged. He wasn't going to be put off by a pat answer, but I wasn't in the mood for giving him more right now. To delay it a bit longer, I said, “Where's your cell phone? If we have reception, I'll call Skinner - he's probably about to organize search parties by now.”
Mulder took his eyes off the road and gave me a look. After a few seconds, during which I met his gaze without flinching, he finally sighed, relented, and handed me his phone from in his jacket pocket.
As expected, Skinner sounded even more tense than usual. “Agent Scully, I've been trying to reach you and Agent Mulder for more than a day. Where are you?”
“We're driving back toward Richmond right now, sir,” I told him. “I'm sorry, our cell phones have been out of service range until now.”
“And just what have you been doing?”
I cleared my throat, giving myself a moment to gather my thoughts. “Do you remember Ruskin Dam, sir?”
There was a significant pause, and then Skinner replied, “Of course I do.”
“Well, uh, two nights ago-” I looked at Mulder for confirmation, and he nodded, “I... apparently experienced a similar phenomenon. But this time, since I left from our motel, Agent Mulder was able to follow me and... prevent me from coming to any major harm. Unfortunately, we were then both forced to remain where we were, due to continued activity from-- from the same forces that drew me out there.” There. Once again, I had successfully managed to avoid saying the word 'alien.' The thought brought a faint wry smile to my lips.
I heard Skinner sigh over the line. “All right, where are you headed right now?”
“The nearest hospital,” I reported. “Just as a precaution, and for some minor injuries we both sustained.”
“I'll meet you there.” With that, he hung up.
I relayed his reply to Mulder, who nodded again. Then he smiled slightly. “Maybe we can leave the fact that I borrowed this car out of our initial report, at least. What do you say, Scully?”
I couldn't help but smile in response. “If Skinner doesn't ask, I won't bring it up.” A sudden thought at that moment made my amusement disappear rapidly. “Mulder, last time this happened... a lot of people were killed. And we heard at least one person die this time. Did-- did you see how many other people were drawn to that field?”
Mulder swallowed, keeping his eyes on the road. “I... I didn't get a good look at them all, but there were probably at least as many as at Ruskin Dam. There were certainly a lot of other cars abandoned in that field.”
There was nothing I could say to that. Though I knew rationally that we had been lucky to survive this whole thing ourselves, and that there was nothing to say that any other survivors would have been anywhere near the cave where we had been holed up, I knew we would both feel the guilt of not looking for and trying to rescue others before we left.
~~~
Upon our arrival at the hospital, Mulder and I were shuttled off to separate examination rooms. He had first informed my doctor as best as he could of what had happened to me during the period that I still could not remember. The usual tests were run, and the cut on my arm was deemed to be healing well enough that I would not need stitches. The dehydration was mild enough that my doctor did not see the need to admit me, as long as I took it easy and drank plenty of water in the next day or so.
While I was on my way to where they had told me Mulder would be, a voice called my name. I turned, expecting to see Skinner, but it was Byers.
“Agent Scully,” he greeted me, looking concerned. “How are you?”
“I'm all right,” I told him. “I was just on my way to see Mulder.”
He nodded. “I'm sure he'll want to hear our news, too - but I can't stay long. I have to get back. Can you pass it along to him, and tell him we'll be in touch?”
“What's wrong, Byers?” There was something about his expression and what he wasn't saying that sent a chill down my spine.
Byers sighed. “Agent Scully, we have reason to believe that-- that this incident that drew you and Mulder out to that field is only the first of many.”
I stared at him. “The first of many?”
“I'm afraid so.” He looked like he deeply regretted having no better news to give me. “There have been quite a few reports in other areas of the country, and some of the ships were even caught on satellite. We're working on trying to predict where the next ship will be, but we don't have anything concrete yet.”
So is this it, I wondered bleakly - is this the beginning of the end? I hadn't ever allowed myself to think too much about the possibility of colonization whenever Mulder had brought it up, but I didn't know what else this could herald.
“Agent Scully?” Byers's concern had increased. “Are you sure you're all right?”
I nodded, and managed a small smile. “Yes. Thank you. It's... it's just not news I was expecting. I'll be sure to tell Mulder.”
He nodded. “We'll be in touch.”
As he left, I took a deep breath before continuing toward where Mulder was probably finishing up his examination by now. I arrived there just in time to see him exit the room, and for Skinner to come around the corner.
“Agents,” he said, looking at both of us, “how are you doing?”
I could tell that Mulder wanted to hear the results of my examination, so I answered first. “Uh, nothing serious, sir. The doctor recommended taking it easy for a while, that's all.”
“That's good to hear,” Skinner replied. He turned to Mulder.
“Oh, just the usual for me,” Mulder said dismissively. “A mild concussion, couple of bruises. They wanted to admit me so they could wake me up every few hours, but I told them I wasn't going to sleep anyway.”
“All right,” Skinner said, attempting to ignore his agent's flippancy. “I'm not expecting a report tonight - I want you two to take it easy and get some rest - but if this was anything like Ruskin Dam, I need to know where you were so we can get people out there to search for any other survivors.”
At this, Mulder was all business. He gave Skinner quick directions and as much of a description of the site of the crashed ship as he could. Skinner nodded and would have left, but I stopped him.
“Wait, sir, I think you'll want to hear this, too.” Both he and Mulder looked at me inquiringly. “Just a few moments ago one of our... main sources told me that he has reason to believe that there will be many more of these incidents in the immediate future.” I told them what Byers had told me about the other reported incidents across the country.
Mulder's dismay at this news was written clearly on his face, and even Skinner looked as upset as he ever did. “How immediate? Are you in danger tonight?”
I shook my head, suppressing a sigh as I imagined how I was going to live in these next few months. “I don't think so, sir.”
He frowned. “But you're not sure.” It wasn't a question.
“I-- I can't be entirely sure,” I admitted, “but I am fairly certain that I recognize the signs now, and I don't feel the same as I did before the other incidents.” It was true: after this latest round, I was almost positive that I wasn't going to be caught completely unaware again. There were enough warning signs. In fact, that was one main thing that was keeping me from despairing at the Gunmen's latest findings.
After a moment, Skinner nodded, though he looked unconvinced. “I need to know if and when that changes, Agent Scully.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Agent Mulder,” Skinner continued, and then he hesitated, glancing at me. “I know I don't need to tell you this, but... stay alert.”
Mulder nodded. “Yes, sir.”
“I expect you both back in DC tomorrow,” he said. “Get some rest tonight.”
As soon as our boss had left, Mulder turned to me with a grim expression on his face. “Scully, who was it who told you about there being more ships coming?”
“It was Byers,” I said. “He said they would be in touch as soon as they knew more.”
He sighed, and ran a hand over his face. He seemed suddenly exhausted.
I put a hand on his arm. “Come on. Let's get back to the motel, Mulder.”
Mulder said nothing, but walked with me out to the car. He didn't protest when I took the driver's seat, and remained silent the entire way back to the motel. Finally, when I turned off the motor in the parking lot, he heaved another sigh and leaned back in his seat, eyes closed.
“Mulder...” I started, but trailed off. I wasn't sure what I had been planning to say.
He clenched his fists. In the dim light from the front of the motel, I could just barely see his eyes as he turned to look at me. “Scully, was that true - what you said to Skinner about recognizing the signs of when a ship is about to arrive?”
“Yes.” I took a deep breath, remembering the general feeling of anxiety and edginess that I had ignored on the way out here to Virginia... and the much more pronounced fear I had felt until the second ship had left the crash site. “They-- they aren't always exactly the same, but I know what they are now.”
Silence fell again. I gathered up my courage and asked, “Do you think this is colonization?”
“I don't know, Scully.” His voice was almost inaudible. “I have no idea how we're going to face it, if it is. I thought we had... more time.”
My heart sank. Mulder didn't often sound this discouraged, and I wasn't sure I had enough fight left in me to get us both ready to do what we could. I wasn't even sure if I had fully accepted the idea that alien colonization was going to happen. “Well, maybe it's not really colonization. And maybe the Gunmen are wrong, and nothing else is going to happen right now.” And maybe Santa Claus is real.
Mulder smiled faintly. “Maybe.” He reached across and took my hand briefly. “I guess we should try to get some sleep. We'll deal with it in the morning.”
We headed inside. As we prepared to enter our separate rooms, Mulder spoke again. “Hey, Scully - we are going to figure this out.” He sounded tired, but resolute.
I nodded, holding back a yawn as my own exhaustion caught up with me.
“And... we'll figure something out that doesn't involve you being under constant guard, I promise,” he continued, in a quieter tone.
“I hope so,” I muttered. The only other solution not involving the removal of my chip that presented itself to my mind at the moment involved handcuffs - and while I was sure that would provide no end of innuendo from Mulder, it was hardly more appealing than guards. But even with the limited options I could see before me, I had already resolved that getting rid of the chip was a last resort. How could I give up, and leave Mulder to face this new catastrophe by himself?
“Good night, Scully.” He opened his door, and then paused. “Um, I know I just said you wouldn't be under guard, but... would you mind if we kept the door between our rooms open tonight? I'll be able to sleep better knowing I could hear you sooner if...”
“Sure, Mulder,” I said. I gave him a small smile as I opened my door. “Good night.”
~~~~~~
Author's Note 2: The intriguing lyric quoted below helped inspire this fic, although the story quickly changed into something entirely different than how I thought it would go.
My tongue is lost, so I can't tell you
Please just see it in my eyes.
- Snow Patrol, “Headlights on Dark Roads”
.
Title: On Dark Roads
Spoilers: season 6, with specific references to Patient X/TRATB
Category: XRA
Keywords: M/S UST, AU.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: I wondered what he would do if I told him that I wanted to remove the chip. I wasn't even sure if that was the truth, if that was what I wanted.
Disclaimer: I do not own Mulder or Scully, nor do I intend to make money off them.
Archive: Sure, but please ask first.
Author's Note: This is my first fic that has more than a passing reference to the mytharc. I hope it worked out decently well!
Also, thanks are owed to both amalnahurriyeh and belsum for their helpful comments and suggestions.
~~~~~~~~
I woke up slowly to a pounding headache. Whatever I was lying on was hard and uncomfortable, but there was something soft over me, keeping most of me warm. My entire body ached, not just my head. I tried to sit up to find out what had happened.
Immediately, a gentle but firm hand on my shoulder stopped me - Mulder. I opened my mouth. “Mul-”
Before the name completely left my lips, Mulder's hand had moved to them from my shoulder. He shook his head. Then he slowly took his hand away, and helped me to sit up.
I was still wanting to know what was going on, but I did look around before trying to speak again. We seemed to be inside a cave. There was a blanket over me, and a somewhat inexpertly-fashioned bandage covering my left forearm. Mulder was crouched next to me (the ceiling of the cave looked to be not quite tall enough for him to stand) with an anxious expression and a large bruise on his face. Based on the light coming in from the mouth of the cave, it was either early morning or relatively late evening.
I opened my mouth to ask where we were, and Mulder quickly held up a hand and shook his head again. Frustrated, I raised my eyebrow and looked at him, communicating my need for information, and fast.
Mulder held up one finger - Wait - and disappeared further into the cave for a few seconds. He came back holding a bottle of water and a notepad with a pen. I drank the water gratefully as Mulder quickly wrote a few lines. Then I waited. After a moment, he handed me the notepad.
We're in Virginia, in the middle of nowhere. I followed you last night. Your chip again. Those words seemed to stand out more than the rest. The ship crashed, maybe shot down. Faceless aliens still looking for survivors and witnesses.
I stared at the page, then slowly reached my hand up to the back of my neck. I winced as I encountered a bruise slightly below it. Then I swallowed. Had it really happened again? I cast my mind back to my last memory before writing a response to Mulder.
I don't remember coming here, I told him. Even writing this down shook me. Last thing I remember is the hotel in Richmond, and our case. I hesitated, then continued, What happened to me? Then I crossed out the last word and wrote “us”.
Mulder took the paper and read it. He looked at me and then looked down hastily, clearly ashamed. The pen scratched over the paper for a few more seconds before I got my answer.
You didn't want to come with me. I had to almost drag you away. It was dark - I couldn't see where we were going very well.
I put down the notepad and took his hand. As much as I was disquieted by this revelation, I knew we both needed comfort right now. He held my hand, but still refused to meet my eyes. Then a thought struck me, and I reached up with my other hand to the bruise on Mulder's face. At my light touch, Mulder winced, but looked at me with a tiny rueful smile and nod.
My mouth dropped open. I had done this to him? I had absolutely no memory of any of this, and it was almost impossible for me to get my mind around the idea that I had been so determined to stay at the site of the ship that I had injured Mulder when he was trying to keep me safe.
Mulder's smile widened, and he took my hand away from his face, enfolding it in his own. It was his turn to reassure his partner, and I saw in his eyes no hint of blame, only infinite relief and tenderness - the same expression, in fact, that I remembered seeing on his face when I had woken in the hospital after Ruskin Dam.
After meeting his gaze for a few more moments, I returned his smile. Then I gently disengaged my hands from his and picked up the notepad again. Supplies?
Mulder nodded, comprehension clear on his face, and he stood up (as far as was possible for him) to move to the back of the cave again. He returned carrying two small bags - both his overnight bag and mine - and a first aid kit that I recognized as the one from my trunk. He set them down next to me, then shrugged. This was it, apparently.
I was about to reach for my bag when I froze. The sound of running footsteps outside the cave was clearly audible, and it sounded like they were getting closer.
Silently, I met Mulder's alarmed expression, then stood up as quietly and carefully as I could. Bringing the blanket with me, I hurried farther back into the cave with him, trying to ignore the dizziness that threatened to overwhelm me as I did so. I knew that if this incident had affected me anything like the last time, I really needed to be lying down until my blood pressure was back to normal. But I wasn't about to lie there helplessly and wait for Mulder to move me out of harm's way - especially since that would put both of us at more risk of being discovered by whoever was coming.
The footsteps kept getting closer, and I bit back a groan as I saw that I had left the pen and notepad behind in my attempt to hide. Next to me, Mulder suddenly gripped my shoulder - he had seen the objects as well. They would not be visible from a cursory glance inside the cave... but there was no guarantee that whoever was approaching would not look more closely, especially if it was one of the faceless creatures.
Whoever it was stopped right outside the entrance to the cave. I held my breath. Though I still had no clear memories of that night at Ruskin Dam, I did vividly remember hearing the horror in my own voice as I had recounted under hypnosis the actions of the men without faces.
The sound of ragged breathing became audible just as a figure ducked partially into the cave. It was a man, youngish-looking, with a panicked expression visible on his profile even though he was facing out of the cave. I relaxed fractionally. At least he clearly had a face.
The young man had not noticed the other occupants of the cave yet. I looked at Mulder. Should we make him aware of our presence?
Before we could decide, the man let out something that sounded like a gasp and a scream, and dashed out of the cave as fast as he could. In seconds, the screams started up again, much louder and more agonized, and I closed my eyes. I could smell charred flesh, and then the screams ceased.
Just as quickly, I opened my eyes again. There was nothing stopping the... alien, if that's really what it was, from checking if there was anyone else in its victim's hiding spot. Mulder reached for his gun, as he had when the man had been approaching. I wished futilely that I had been in any kind of mental state to bring my own.
We waited in silence for what seemed like an eternity. No further sounds came from outside, after the victim's screams had faded. Finally, Mulder met my eyes, then crept forward cautiously, still with his weapon at the ready. He peered around the edge of the opening. After a few seconds, he moved so that he could see more. I held my breath again - but then Mulder holstered his gun and turned around. His posture was relaxed.
Apparently, my relief at our narrow escape was enough to make my vertigo increase, with the result that I nearly fell down instead of sitting. In an instant, Mulder was at my side, carefully lowering me to the cave floor and trying to position me as comfortably as possible as I lay down. His hand brushed across my left arm in this process, and the pain caused me to flinch and hold back a cry.
Mulder stopped moving and bit his lip, then resumed covering me with the blanket. His eyes were apologetic as he looked at me.
I shook my head slightly, and winced at the discomfort that motion produced. The dizziness had started to fade until that ill-thought moment. I closed my eyes again, willing the world to stop spinning.
After a few moments, I felt something soft beside my face, and I reluctantly opened my eyes to see that Mulder had folded up what looked to be a sweatshirt and was easing it under my head. Somehow, it made lying on the cold, uneven, rocky ground vastly more comfortable. I wanted to thank him, and at the same time I wanted to tell him to let me take care of myself. Instead, I just smiled at him briefly before closing my eyes yet again. Despite the fact that we were still in real and imminent danger, I was beginning to realize that I was in no shape to do anything but sleep right now. I could only hope that Mulder would take as good care of himself while I was resting as he was taking of me.
~~~
When I next woke, it took me a while to realize where I was. This was not helped by the fact that it was now darker outside, so there was even less visibility in the cave. When my eyes finally adjusted, I saw Mulder sitting watch near the entrance. I sat up carefully, and Mulder, noticing, made his way over to me.
“How are you feeling, Scully?” he whispered. He handed me the water bottle again.
I took stock. The dizziness was almost gone, and although I was still sore and stiff, it wasn't too bad. “Much better,” I whispered back. “Thank you.”
He smiled and nodded, and I took a drink from the water bottle. “How are you, Mulder?” I asked, handing it back and continuing to whisper.
“A little chilly,” he answered, “and in need of a hot shower and a meal, but other than that, I'm okay.” He sat down next to me. “It's been quiet since you went to sleep.”
I nodded (cautiously, this time). “I don't suppose cell phones get service out here?”
Mulder shook his head. “I did manage to call the Gunmen from the car on the way here, though. So they have a general idea of what I was doing.”
At that, I looked down. I still found it hard to think about the events that must have led us here. It hadn't even been very long since the first time the chip in my neck had taken away my will. How many more times was this going to happen before I was abducted again, or killed by the faceless men? How could I live with this constant specter of being 'called' at any time? And yet, the consequences of going without the chip were even more assuredly bleak.
Next to me, Mulder sighed, perhaps guessing at the turn of my thoughts. “I'm sorry, Scully.”
I could tell he wasn't just apologizing for the injuries I had incurred on the way here. No matter how many times I told him that I didn't blame him for the hardships in my life since I had joined the X-Files, I still don't think I have ever gotten him to believe that it isn't all his fault.
I decided to change the subject. “Any chance of something to eat?”
“Not a whole lot, unfortunately,” Mulder answered. He pulled over my overnight bag, and handed me a granola bar. “There are three more of those, and a Snickers and some sunflower seeds in my bag.”
“Have you eaten anything?” I asked as I unwrapped the bar.
He shook his head. “I'm not hungry.”
I frowned and gave him a look that he probably couldn't really see, as dark as it was in the cave. “Mulder, you're the one who has a gun and is physically well enough to defend both of us. You need to keep up your strength.”
Holding up his hands in surrender, Mulder scooted closer. “All right, if you insist, Dr. Scully.” He took one of the remaining granola bars, and we ate in silence.
As I finished the last bite of the meager meal, I suddenly began to feel uneasy. I dropped the wrapper on my blanket, shivering.
“What is it, Scully?”
I turned to him and opened my mouth, but found that I couldn't speak. The feeling of unease had grown into full-blown fear. A cloud of confusion and terror had descended over me, leaving me unable to do anything but raise a trembling hand to the back of my neck.
Dimly, I heard Mulder whisper urgently, “Scully, what's wrong? Talk to me, please!”
I met his eyes again. They're coming again, I wanted to tell him, but instead I grabbed onto his arms and pulled him close. This time, I would not be totally at the mercy of the chip.
Before Mulder could do more than wrap his arms around me in an attempt to reassure me, the cave shook as something passed by low to the ground. There was a rumbling, roaring sound that I was pretty sure wasn't only in my ears. Rocks and dirt rained down around us, but I barely noticed if any hit me. I was too busy gasping for breath and fighting in desperation against the terrifyingly strong urge to leave the cave. I'm sure I left bruises on Mulder as I clung to him.
The sound of the ship faded somewhat, but I knew it was still very close by - close enough that its pull was still strong. I was concentrating so hard on fighting it that it took me quite a while to notice that Mulder had lifted me entirely into his arms, onto his lap, and that he was whispering “Stay with me, Scully,” over and over.
After a length of time that was impossible to calculate, I loosened my grip on my partner fractionally. It seemed like the immediate danger might be passing. Maybe the ship was leaving. As rational thought began to return to me, I wondered why another ship had come to this same area. Wasn't it obvious to them that all their would-be abductees had just been killed by the... the other aliens, the rebels? Were they now trying to draw out the survivors? Or the rebels?
Mulder waited a few more minutes - or hours, it was still hard to tell - before relaxing his own grip somewhat. “Is it gone?” he asked, in such a faint whisper that I would not have heard him had we not been so close to each other. I could hear and feel his heart pounding.
I realized that I was still trembling, and I took a deep, slow breath to attempt to steady myself. “I - I think it's leaving,” I whispered back. At any rate, it was no longer calling me.
Slowly, we both allowed ourselves to calm down. I pulled away from him a little, and he took the opportunity to wrap the blanket around me again. It wasn't surprising that I was cold and shivering, I thought. I was probably going into shock. Perhaps realizing this as well, Mulder again pulled me to himself as soon as the blanket was around me.
Sighing, I curled up against him. I was exhausted by the effort of resisting the call, but I knew I wouldn't be sleeping any time soon. It had only been chance that I was awake this time when the ship had come, and although that meant that I hadn't lost my will entirely, it also meant I remained fully conscious of what would happen to me if I didn't fight it hard enough.
Despair started to set in as I pondered what would happen if the ship came again tonight. I was too tired to fight it anymore. Would I end up striking out at Mulder again while in the grip of the call? Would he have to knock me unconscious for my own safety? I swallowed, and closed my eyes.
“Scully, are you all right?” came Mulder's hesitant, soft query.
I almost laughed bitterly. Instead, I said the first thing that came to mind. “I don't think I can deal with this anymore, Mulder.”
He didn't answer right away. “What-- what do you mean?”
“I won't be awake or able to fight every time they call, and you can't be around to follow me every time, either,” I said. “One of these days...”
“No,” Mulder said, his tone hard and dangerously loud in volume. He tightened his grip on me for a second, and then continued in a quieter voice, “No, Scully, that's never going to happen. We'll figure something out.”
I sighed again. I knew he was already thinking of ways I could be guarded constantly - with help from the Gunmen, probably. But either way, I would no longer have even the illusion of independence or control over my own life. “Mulder, I don't want to be kept under constant guard, like... like some kind of rare artifact in a museum. I need to be able to live my life.”
It was his turn to sigh at that. “I know.”
He didn't offer any empty reassurances. I wondered what he would do if I told him that I wanted to remove the chip. I wasn't even sure if that was the truth, if that was what I really wanted. But part of me did. At least that way I would be in more control of when and how I died.
Trying to shake off those dark thoughts, I muttered, “I'm just so tired.”
“Sleep, Scully,” Mulder said. He smoothed the blanket across my back, and the message was clear: he would make sure I was still here in the morning.
~~~
My dreams that night were full of brief snatches of a bridge full of people, and being surrounded by screams as faceless men approached to destroy us all. Then another ship appeared above us, and I slowly raised my hands toward it with my companions. I felt a strong desire in my fogged mind that it would be me chosen to be taken this time, instead of Cassandra.
I awoke with a gasp. There was faint light coming in through the entrance of the cave, and I was still lying on Mulder's lap... or more accurately lying across his chest, since at some point in the night he had stretched out as much as he could on the cave floor. It sounded from his breathing like he must be asleep, but his arm was still comfortably tight across my shoulders.
For the first time in who knows how many hours, I smiled. I hoped he had decided to allow himself to sleep more than a few minutes ago. He certainly needed it, since this whole unplanned excursion had been robbing him of rest for several nights now.
As I looked at him in the gray light of early morning, Mulder stirred and opened his eyes. He smiled upon meeting mine, and dropped his arm away from my back. “Good morning, Scully.”
“It is,” I said quietly. “I'm still here.”
He nodded, looking at me seriously.
“Thank you.”
“You're welcome.”
We both sat up. I was still stiff and more than slightly sore, and glancing down at my bandaged arm reminded me that it was probably time to change the dressing. There was no dizziness, however.
“Feeling any better?” he inquired, still keeping his voice low.
I nodded. “I think so. I want to change this bandage, though.”
Mulder reached over for the first aid kit and pulled it toward us, groaning as he stretched his own sore muscles. “I could really go for that hot shower right about now,” he remarked.
“That does sound good.” I found the bandages, took them out, and turned my attention to removing the old bandage on my arm. I could feel Mulder's eyes on me as I slowly took it off, biting my lip against the pain. The gash underneath was large but shallow. It didn't look like it would need stitches, but it was not entirely clotted. I used a small bit of our precious water to clean it as best as I could.
“Need any help?”
I was about to refuse, but then I thought better of it. “If you could hold this edge down, that would make it easier.”
With his help, I had a respectable bandage in a matter of seconds. Then we looked at each other for a moment, silent. It was time to think about the next step.
“I could do some reconnaissance,” Mulder offered. “See if there's anything moving out there.” He frowned. “Except you don't have your weapon with you.”
I shook my head and took a deep breath. “I'll be fine, Mulder. No one... nothing discovered this cave last night, and I'll move further inside.” I gathered up our meager supplies in preparation. “Otherwise, we'll just end up stuck in here for who knows how long, and we don't have enough food and water to last.”
Mulder sighed. He didn't like it, but he knew I was right. Finally, he stood up as far as he was able and walked over to the cave entrance. “I'll be back as soon as I can.”
“Be careful,” I whispered. I don't think I managed to hide my worry when I raised my eyes to meet his. Even as I wanted him to leave to see if it was safe, it was impossible not to fear that the ship would return while he was gone. If that happened, we would both be in terrible danger.
He nodded once, and slipped out of the cave.
~~~
As soon as he was gone, I kept my word and pulled myself and all of our belongings as far back into the cave as I could. It wasn't a terribly big cavern, so this did not amount to much movement. Still, at least I was less immediately visible upon entering it, I figured. After this was accomplished, all that was left for me to do was wait.
I settled down with my back against the cave wall. It would be good if I could sleep, I told myself, but I knew that my anxiety for my partner and for myself would most likely prevent this.
The day passed. It was hard to determine the length of time since I did not have a watch with me, but as the shadows began to lengthen, my worry increased. Whatever was causing Mulder to take so long, there was almost no way it could be good. This line of thinking made me feel queasy, but I made myself eat another granola bar and drink some water. I also did a few stretches and tried to walk around a little bit. Just in case Mulder comes back and we need to move quickly, I thought. My head ached again when I first stood up, but the pain didn't last long.
Having nothing else to occupy my mind, my thoughts returned continually to the last night's events. I could not stop myself from trying to figure out the reason that a ship would come to the same place again after the first one had been shot down - if it had been shot down. Was this simply a continuation of the conflict between the two factions, that we had heard about ? Was it a sign of some kind of escalation?
I realized then that I had been thinking about these things solely as they affected the larger picture, and carefully avoiding thoughts of how they would affect me. And Mulder. It was a defense mechanism of some kind, most likely. If I allowed myself to dwell on the personal implications... I shook my head. I did not want to go back to the dark thoughts I was having immediately after the last ship had come and gone.
The last of the light from outside faded slowly but surely. All had been quiet outside my hiding place since Mulder left, and cabin fever was beginning to set in, on top of my steadily-mounting fear. I had just decided to at least take a quick look when the sound of footsteps once again became audible nearby.
Heart pounding, I ducked as far back against the wall of the cave as I could. There was a boulder between me and the entrance, but it was an incomplete screen at best. My right hand gripped a large rock that I had found earlier; it wasn't much of a weapon, but it would have to do.
From my vantage point, I saw a face, instantly familiar despite the fading light, peer into the cave. “Scully?” he whispered. “I'm back. Are you here?”
My relief at seeing him was so great that I almost answered immediately - but then with a jolt I remembered a confrontation years ago, when a man that had looked exactly like Mulder had changed before my eyes into the figure of the bounty hunter. Mulder and I had settled on a safe word to use between us in case of another such situation... but I could not ask this man to use the word, as I would still be at his mercy if he were not Mulder. A rock was not the precision weapon I would need to fend off the bounty hunter's kind.
“Scully, where are you?” the man repeated. He crept a bit further inside.
Please, if it's you, say the safe word, Mulder, I thought, my heart starting to pound again. We hadn't reminded each other about it before he left, but if it were really him, he would know why I was staying hidden.
At that moment, a tiny fragment of rock under the one I was still holding was dislodged. The noise it made as it fell a few feet seemed magnified, and I looked up from behind the boulder - straight into the eyes of the man who looked like my partner. He was smiling, but it was a cold, satisfied smile. “There you are.”
Gasping, I inched backward until my back was flat against the cave wall. “Don't come any closer,” I warned, though I knew he had no reason to listen to me.
He started forward, remaining eerily silent. Frantically, I heaved the rock at him. It struck him square in the chest. It only halted him for a moment, and then he continued toward me. Even as I looked around for something else, anything that would even slow his progress, part of my mind wondered if it gave the bounty hunter some sadistic pleasure to retain Mulder's guise.
There was nothing around me to use as a weapon, and he was within a few steps of reaching me. I took a deep breath and stood up, willing myself to meet my fate without showing fear.
Suddenly, the crack of a gunshot broke the unnatural stillness, and I had just enough time to duck as the figure in front of me clutched at his throat. Green liquid began to hiss and bubble from the wound, and I hastily moved away and covered my face as he fell, shifted into his true form for a moment, and then began to dissolve.
I backed away from the caustic substance and almost ran into Mulder, who was still standing where he had fired the shot. “Scully, are you all right?” he asked, holstering his gun and looking at me in concern. “I would have warned you before I shot, but then he would have moved and I wouldn't have been able to hit the back of the neck.”
I could only stare at him. It didn't seem likely that this wasn't the real Mulder, but there was always the possibility...
“Oh, I'm sorry,” he said after a moment, remorseful. He quickly recited the safe word, and then added, “You know, I was thinking we should change that to 'Roswell.'”
That was definitely Mulder. I began to relax, as he once again asked if I was all right.
“Yeah,” I said, taking deep breaths to try to slow my racing heart. “I'm fine.” I looked at him, noting in the faint light from outside that there was a small cut above his right eye. “What about you?”
He exhaled slowly, turning his gaze back to the pool of green liquid that was now all that remained of the bounty hunter. “I've got a few more cuts and bruises. Nothing serious.”
“Do you think it's safe to leave?”
At this, he smiled wryly. “Well, it's obviously not safe to stay now, is it?”
I shook my head, and crossed my arms against the sudden cool wind. “Guess not.”
Mulder went to gather our supplies together, drawing back with a small cry of disgust when he found that the blood of the bounty hunter had gotten onto one of the duffel bags and ruined it. “I'm sorry I took so long. I didn't run into anyone or anything out there for most of the day,” he told me as he picked up the remaining supplies. “But then our friend here”- he gestured to the green liquid - “caught me by surprise near what I think was the crash site and knocked me out. I guess he must have tracked me back here while I was unconscious.”
I could hear the guilt creep into his tone as he related the last part. Sighing, I walked over to join him, and took the blanket he was holding out. “Mulder, he could have killed you when he found you earlier. I'm just glad you got here in time - and mostly in one piece.”
He didn't seem convinced, but he nodded finally. “Let's get out of here.”
We exited the cave. I contemplated wrapping the blanket around myself, but decided it might hinder my ability to move quickly and just held it under one arm, instead. The late evening air was not dangerously cold.
“Which direction are our cars?” I asked, as we made our way down the small hill outside the cave.
Mulder was heading to our right. “I'm not sure how far, but they're this way.”
I grimaced. The sky was now completely dark. Though I wanted to get out of here, I was not looking forward to trekking through unknown terrain at night to do so. Then I shook my head, and hurried to catch up to Mulder, who had pushed ahead. He had already had to do this, while somehow bringing his uncooperative partner along - and then he had managed to find a place where we could recover in relative safety. At least this time, I was following him willingly.
We made it through what seemed to be a ravine without too much stumbling or being hit in the face by branches. By unspoken agreement, we kept as quiet as possible, for fear of further pursuit.
At last, after what seemed like quite a long trek, I could see the rental car, in the middle of a field where I had apparently left it. It was only then that it occurred to me: as was usual on the type of case we'd been on, we had only rented one car. Where had Mulder gotten the car that was parked right behind our rental?
“Mulder,” I said quietly, as we approached the vehicles, “this is our rental car that I must have taken out here. So whose car is that?”
He turned to look at me for a moment, but I couldn't see his expression in the dark. “We can come back for the rental later,” he said. “I should get this car back to its owner as soon as possible.”
My mouth dropped open. “You stole it?”
“Borrowed it, Scully,” Mulder corrected, opening the back door and throwing in what he had been carrying. “Are you coming?” In the illumination of the car's domelight, he looked somewhat uncertain. “Or I guess-- if you're feeling well enough, you could follow me back in the rental.”
In other circumstances, I thought grimly, neither of us should be driving at all: he probably had a concussion from his earlier confrontation with the bounty hunter, and I was definitely not at my best health-wise, either. “I think the best idea would be for us to be in the same car,” I told him. “Just in case either of us are not as alert as we think.”
Mulder nodded. “Good idea.”
Within minutes, we were on our way back to civilization. I breathed a small sigh of relief as the field passed into the distance behind us - a relief that faded rapidly as I thought of the ship calling me out here all the way from our motel.
“Mulder,” I inquired, trying to keep my voice level, “do you know how many miles away from our motel we are?”
He squinted at the dashboard and calculated for a moment. “I'm not sure, but I think that field where you stopped is about twenty miles outside of Richmond. I guess we should both get checked out at a hospital when we get back to town, right?”
I nodded distractedly. Twenty miles. It had been a greater distance last time, I thought. It would be nice to have some idea of the range from which a 'call' could affect me... but then, since there was no way to predict where a ship would appear next, that still wouldn't help me avoid it. And this time, I hadn't even been having trouble sleeping for the nights leading up to the call - at least, not that I remembered. But on the other hand...
“Scully?”
I looked up quickly. By the sharper, alarmed tone of his voice, I guessed that he had already said my name at least once without getting a response. “What?”
He took a deep breath, his worry replaced by calmer concern. “How are you doing?”
Staring at my hands in my lap, I shrugged. He wasn't going to be put off by a pat answer, but I wasn't in the mood for giving him more right now. To delay it a bit longer, I said, “Where's your cell phone? If we have reception, I'll call Skinner - he's probably about to organize search parties by now.”
Mulder took his eyes off the road and gave me a look. After a few seconds, during which I met his gaze without flinching, he finally sighed, relented, and handed me his phone from in his jacket pocket.
As expected, Skinner sounded even more tense than usual. “Agent Scully, I've been trying to reach you and Agent Mulder for more than a day. Where are you?”
“We're driving back toward Richmond right now, sir,” I told him. “I'm sorry, our cell phones have been out of service range until now.”
“And just what have you been doing?”
I cleared my throat, giving myself a moment to gather my thoughts. “Do you remember Ruskin Dam, sir?”
There was a significant pause, and then Skinner replied, “Of course I do.”
“Well, uh, two nights ago-” I looked at Mulder for confirmation, and he nodded, “I... apparently experienced a similar phenomenon. But this time, since I left from our motel, Agent Mulder was able to follow me and... prevent me from coming to any major harm. Unfortunately, we were then both forced to remain where we were, due to continued activity from-- from the same forces that drew me out there.” There. Once again, I had successfully managed to avoid saying the word 'alien.' The thought brought a faint wry smile to my lips.
I heard Skinner sigh over the line. “All right, where are you headed right now?”
“The nearest hospital,” I reported. “Just as a precaution, and for some minor injuries we both sustained.”
“I'll meet you there.” With that, he hung up.
I relayed his reply to Mulder, who nodded again. Then he smiled slightly. “Maybe we can leave the fact that I borrowed this car out of our initial report, at least. What do you say, Scully?”
I couldn't help but smile in response. “If Skinner doesn't ask, I won't bring it up.” A sudden thought at that moment made my amusement disappear rapidly. “Mulder, last time this happened... a lot of people were killed. And we heard at least one person die this time. Did-- did you see how many other people were drawn to that field?”
Mulder swallowed, keeping his eyes on the road. “I... I didn't get a good look at them all, but there were probably at least as many as at Ruskin Dam. There were certainly a lot of other cars abandoned in that field.”
There was nothing I could say to that. Though I knew rationally that we had been lucky to survive this whole thing ourselves, and that there was nothing to say that any other survivors would have been anywhere near the cave where we had been holed up, I knew we would both feel the guilt of not looking for and trying to rescue others before we left.
~~~
Upon our arrival at the hospital, Mulder and I were shuttled off to separate examination rooms. He had first informed my doctor as best as he could of what had happened to me during the period that I still could not remember. The usual tests were run, and the cut on my arm was deemed to be healing well enough that I would not need stitches. The dehydration was mild enough that my doctor did not see the need to admit me, as long as I took it easy and drank plenty of water in the next day or so.
While I was on my way to where they had told me Mulder would be, a voice called my name. I turned, expecting to see Skinner, but it was Byers.
“Agent Scully,” he greeted me, looking concerned. “How are you?”
“I'm all right,” I told him. “I was just on my way to see Mulder.”
He nodded. “I'm sure he'll want to hear our news, too - but I can't stay long. I have to get back. Can you pass it along to him, and tell him we'll be in touch?”
“What's wrong, Byers?” There was something about his expression and what he wasn't saying that sent a chill down my spine.
Byers sighed. “Agent Scully, we have reason to believe that-- that this incident that drew you and Mulder out to that field is only the first of many.”
I stared at him. “The first of many?”
“I'm afraid so.” He looked like he deeply regretted having no better news to give me. “There have been quite a few reports in other areas of the country, and some of the ships were even caught on satellite. We're working on trying to predict where the next ship will be, but we don't have anything concrete yet.”
So is this it, I wondered bleakly - is this the beginning of the end? I hadn't ever allowed myself to think too much about the possibility of colonization whenever Mulder had brought it up, but I didn't know what else this could herald.
“Agent Scully?” Byers's concern had increased. “Are you sure you're all right?”
I nodded, and managed a small smile. “Yes. Thank you. It's... it's just not news I was expecting. I'll be sure to tell Mulder.”
He nodded. “We'll be in touch.”
As he left, I took a deep breath before continuing toward where Mulder was probably finishing up his examination by now. I arrived there just in time to see him exit the room, and for Skinner to come around the corner.
“Agents,” he said, looking at both of us, “how are you doing?”
I could tell that Mulder wanted to hear the results of my examination, so I answered first. “Uh, nothing serious, sir. The doctor recommended taking it easy for a while, that's all.”
“That's good to hear,” Skinner replied. He turned to Mulder.
“Oh, just the usual for me,” Mulder said dismissively. “A mild concussion, couple of bruises. They wanted to admit me so they could wake me up every few hours, but I told them I wasn't going to sleep anyway.”
“All right,” Skinner said, attempting to ignore his agent's flippancy. “I'm not expecting a report tonight - I want you two to take it easy and get some rest - but if this was anything like Ruskin Dam, I need to know where you were so we can get people out there to search for any other survivors.”
At this, Mulder was all business. He gave Skinner quick directions and as much of a description of the site of the crashed ship as he could. Skinner nodded and would have left, but I stopped him.
“Wait, sir, I think you'll want to hear this, too.” Both he and Mulder looked at me inquiringly. “Just a few moments ago one of our... main sources told me that he has reason to believe that there will be many more of these incidents in the immediate future.” I told them what Byers had told me about the other reported incidents across the country.
Mulder's dismay at this news was written clearly on his face, and even Skinner looked as upset as he ever did. “How immediate? Are you in danger tonight?”
I shook my head, suppressing a sigh as I imagined how I was going to live in these next few months. “I don't think so, sir.”
He frowned. “But you're not sure.” It wasn't a question.
“I-- I can't be entirely sure,” I admitted, “but I am fairly certain that I recognize the signs now, and I don't feel the same as I did before the other incidents.” It was true: after this latest round, I was almost positive that I wasn't going to be caught completely unaware again. There were enough warning signs. In fact, that was one main thing that was keeping me from despairing at the Gunmen's latest findings.
After a moment, Skinner nodded, though he looked unconvinced. “I need to know if and when that changes, Agent Scully.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Agent Mulder,” Skinner continued, and then he hesitated, glancing at me. “I know I don't need to tell you this, but... stay alert.”
Mulder nodded. “Yes, sir.”
“I expect you both back in DC tomorrow,” he said. “Get some rest tonight.”
As soon as our boss had left, Mulder turned to me with a grim expression on his face. “Scully, who was it who told you about there being more ships coming?”
“It was Byers,” I said. “He said they would be in touch as soon as they knew more.”
He sighed, and ran a hand over his face. He seemed suddenly exhausted.
I put a hand on his arm. “Come on. Let's get back to the motel, Mulder.”
Mulder said nothing, but walked with me out to the car. He didn't protest when I took the driver's seat, and remained silent the entire way back to the motel. Finally, when I turned off the motor in the parking lot, he heaved another sigh and leaned back in his seat, eyes closed.
“Mulder...” I started, but trailed off. I wasn't sure what I had been planning to say.
He clenched his fists. In the dim light from the front of the motel, I could just barely see his eyes as he turned to look at me. “Scully, was that true - what you said to Skinner about recognizing the signs of when a ship is about to arrive?”
“Yes.” I took a deep breath, remembering the general feeling of anxiety and edginess that I had ignored on the way out here to Virginia... and the much more pronounced fear I had felt until the second ship had left the crash site. “They-- they aren't always exactly the same, but I know what they are now.”
Silence fell again. I gathered up my courage and asked, “Do you think this is colonization?”
“I don't know, Scully.” His voice was almost inaudible. “I have no idea how we're going to face it, if it is. I thought we had... more time.”
My heart sank. Mulder didn't often sound this discouraged, and I wasn't sure I had enough fight left in me to get us both ready to do what we could. I wasn't even sure if I had fully accepted the idea that alien colonization was going to happen. “Well, maybe it's not really colonization. And maybe the Gunmen are wrong, and nothing else is going to happen right now.” And maybe Santa Claus is real.
Mulder smiled faintly. “Maybe.” He reached across and took my hand briefly. “I guess we should try to get some sleep. We'll deal with it in the morning.”
We headed inside. As we prepared to enter our separate rooms, Mulder spoke again. “Hey, Scully - we are going to figure this out.” He sounded tired, but resolute.
I nodded, holding back a yawn as my own exhaustion caught up with me.
“And... we'll figure something out that doesn't involve you being under constant guard, I promise,” he continued, in a quieter tone.
“I hope so,” I muttered. The only other solution not involving the removal of my chip that presented itself to my mind at the moment involved handcuffs - and while I was sure that would provide no end of innuendo from Mulder, it was hardly more appealing than guards. But even with the limited options I could see before me, I had already resolved that getting rid of the chip was a last resort. How could I give up, and leave Mulder to face this new catastrophe by himself?
“Good night, Scully.” He opened his door, and then paused. “Um, I know I just said you wouldn't be under guard, but... would you mind if we kept the door between our rooms open tonight? I'll be able to sleep better knowing I could hear you sooner if...”
“Sure, Mulder,” I said. I gave him a small smile as I opened my door. “Good night.”
~~~~~~
Author's Note 2: The intriguing lyric quoted below helped inspire this fic, although the story quickly changed into something entirely different than how I thought it would go.
My tongue is lost, so I can't tell you
Please just see it in my eyes.
- Snow Patrol, “Headlights on Dark Roads”