Only the Weak Are Made Strong
This morning my alarm went off at 5 a.m. I intended to get up and take a shower, and then proceed to Intercession. But I could barely get out of bed. I managed to stumble over to the bathroom. However, I could not stand up straight or really even see straight. Obviously I was very tired. Now the problem with this is that I actually thought that I could pull myself out of bed with only three hours of sleep, get ready, drive 45 minutes to Chesapeake, participate in Intercession, drive back home, and then crash. Sounds good in theory, doesn't it?
I prayed before I went to sleep, and I know God heard me... because He spoke to me last night about a couple of things. I'm starting to think that perhaps my intentions for going to Intercession were the wrong ones. Yes I wanted to pray with my brothers and sisters in Christ... but it was almost as if I saw it as "something I HAVE to do" rather than "a blessing to be able to do this." I do not want Intercession to turn into a chore. With the level of exhaustion I felt early this morning, it would have only been like a chore... as if I had something to prove. But I don't. It is all about my personal relationship with God and the fellowship between brothers and sisters in Christ. It is about coming together in Jesus' name. I must understand this and move past the "what do others think about me coming or not coming?" Doing stuff with the church is about doing what you love for the One you should love the most... Jesus Christ.
Yeah, I thought I could be strong enough to get up this morning, but I wasn't. I tend to think I'm strong enough to do anything and everything in one breath. But I'm not. I am ONLY made strong through the Lord Jesus Christ. And when I actually convince myself that I can be strong on my own... at any level... I am, in reality, weaker than I could ever be. On the flipside, when I KNOW that I am weak and that I really cannot take a single productive step without God... now THAT is when I am truly strong (for Christ is my Rock).
So perhaps next week I will rely more on God and less on my own false human strength. And I will pray that Intercession becomes a blessing deep inside my heart, not a chore in my mind.
A personal walk with God is a learning process, as you may very well be able to see here.
I prayed before I went to sleep, and I know God heard me... because He spoke to me last night about a couple of things. I'm starting to think that perhaps my intentions for going to Intercession were the wrong ones. Yes I wanted to pray with my brothers and sisters in Christ... but it was almost as if I saw it as "something I HAVE to do" rather than "a blessing to be able to do this." I do not want Intercession to turn into a chore. With the level of exhaustion I felt early this morning, it would have only been like a chore... as if I had something to prove. But I don't. It is all about my personal relationship with God and the fellowship between brothers and sisters in Christ. It is about coming together in Jesus' name. I must understand this and move past the "what do others think about me coming or not coming?" Doing stuff with the church is about doing what you love for the One you should love the most... Jesus Christ.
Yeah, I thought I could be strong enough to get up this morning, but I wasn't. I tend to think I'm strong enough to do anything and everything in one breath. But I'm not. I am ONLY made strong through the Lord Jesus Christ. And when I actually convince myself that I can be strong on my own... at any level... I am, in reality, weaker than I could ever be. On the flipside, when I KNOW that I am weak and that I really cannot take a single productive step without God... now THAT is when I am truly strong (for Christ is my Rock).
So perhaps next week I will rely more on God and less on my own false human strength. And I will pray that Intercession becomes a blessing deep inside my heart, not a chore in my mind.
A personal walk with God is a learning process, as you may very well be able to see here.