in which I totally go Mediaeval Catholic Church
1) Bob Evans has bought the farm.
2) Whenever I see antipasto or antipasti on a menu, I always read it as "the anti pasta," as in "under NO circumstances is this going to support pasta, BITCH!" I know that this "anti-" comes from "ante," and I know that antipasto loosely means "before the food," but still.
Antipasta. Sort of like the Anti-Christ, only the Antipasta is an agent of ninjas (the hereditary enemies of pirates), who are out to destroy the FSM. If you want to stop global warming, then don't give into the Antipasta. The Antipasta wants you to order lots and lots of appetizers (especially half-priced ones served after ten). Don't give into temptation! His Noodley Appendage wants you to order entrees only, ye depraved hors d'oeuvre eaters!
(If you ever watch me read a menu at an Italian restaurant, you'll notice I become very quiet. That's because this battle is waging in my thoughts, and I'm silently asking the FSM to give me strength.)
(I could probably end this by only eating at Bob Evanses, out of respect for the late Mr. Evans. May he rest in peace.)
(...down on the farm.)
2) Whenever I see antipasto or antipasti on a menu, I always read it as "the anti pasta," as in "under NO circumstances is this going to support pasta, BITCH!" I know that this "anti-" comes from "ante," and I know that antipasto loosely means "before the food," but still.
Antipasta. Sort of like the Anti-Christ, only the Antipasta is an agent of ninjas (the hereditary enemies of pirates), who are out to destroy the FSM. If you want to stop global warming, then don't give into the Antipasta. The Antipasta wants you to order lots and lots of appetizers (especially half-priced ones served after ten). Don't give into temptation! His Noodley Appendage wants you to order entrees only, ye depraved hors d'oeuvre eaters!
(If you ever watch me read a menu at an Italian restaurant, you'll notice I become very quiet. That's because this battle is waging in my thoughts, and I'm silently asking the FSM to give me strength.)
(I could probably end this by only eating at Bob Evanses, out of respect for the late Mr. Evans. May he rest in peace.)
(...down on the farm.)