please please please tell me none of it was a dream...
exactly almost somewhat twelve days is how long i stayed to visit elyza in boston.
it's not even a matter of what i've learned, but how i've felt. seriously, it was the best time of my life.
i'm changed. happier, even if i was already insanely as happy as i thought i could ever get.
it seems like accepting loneliness as the best freedom i could ever ask for has given me a gift of knowing that i am truly able to feel excitement, nervousness, and something so close to what love could be made out of again.
if you knew me, i haven't talked like the way i've been talking about somebody in forever.
it's against my nature to accept someone so hastily, so suddenly in a serious level other than the next mission. no one believe in courting nowadays. hardly anyone, even myself, believes that people do things "the right way." and, yet, i've found that feeling of wanting everything to go well with someone. holding onto sudden hope and allowing faith in chance, i don't allow myself to be so silly often. yet, i turned down many a things that even surprised me, just for a chance.
and, i had NO idea the east coast was hella crackin'!
the weather, the people, the environment. may be it was the MIT heads shitting all over the yay area, inspiring the shit outta me to do what i want to do and be damn FANTASTIC at it. may be it was the fact that my lovely, favorable cousins in new york welcomed me into their homes and allowed ely and i to explore on our owns for the day. may be it was being able to get lost and explore another place, completely different from that which i call home, aimlessly, all by myself; enjoying every bit of it.
may be it was all the people i was able to connect with from new mexico, d.c., jersey, niger (HA), puerto rico, and minnesota...or that this was the most i've been able to see elyza in a year since we went to school together K through 4th grade, and i realized for the first time exactly why we stayed as good as friends as we have been. OR, i realized how i still don't know how as children we were able to grasp the concept of "you're my homies for life" and be willing to stick with it, no matter how many changes, no matter how much time. i mean, i went to visit this beezy from the other side of the bloody country. it really puts things in perspective for all the friendships i find absolutely meaningful in my life. i'm completely grateful.
i cried an hour into the plane ride back.
i cried a tad bit when elyza dropped me off home.
fuckin' had a HELLAAAA good time in blostonian territory.
i just woke up from a three hour nap, falling asleep to slow jams.
and, it's not over.
it's not even a matter of what i've learned, but how i've felt. seriously, it was the best time of my life.
i'm changed. happier, even if i was already insanely as happy as i thought i could ever get.
it seems like accepting loneliness as the best freedom i could ever ask for has given me a gift of knowing that i am truly able to feel excitement, nervousness, and something so close to what love could be made out of again.
if you knew me, i haven't talked like the way i've been talking about somebody in forever.
it's against my nature to accept someone so hastily, so suddenly in a serious level other than the next mission. no one believe in courting nowadays. hardly anyone, even myself, believes that people do things "the right way." and, yet, i've found that feeling of wanting everything to go well with someone. holding onto sudden hope and allowing faith in chance, i don't allow myself to be so silly often. yet, i turned down many a things that even surprised me, just for a chance.
and, i had NO idea the east coast was hella crackin'!
the weather, the people, the environment. may be it was the MIT heads shitting all over the yay area, inspiring the shit outta me to do what i want to do and be damn FANTASTIC at it. may be it was the fact that my lovely, favorable cousins in new york welcomed me into their homes and allowed ely and i to explore on our owns for the day. may be it was being able to get lost and explore another place, completely different from that which i call home, aimlessly, all by myself; enjoying every bit of it.
may be it was all the people i was able to connect with from new mexico, d.c., jersey, niger (HA), puerto rico, and minnesota...or that this was the most i've been able to see elyza in a year since we went to school together K through 4th grade, and i realized for the first time exactly why we stayed as good as friends as we have been. OR, i realized how i still don't know how as children we were able to grasp the concept of "you're my homies for life" and be willing to stick with it, no matter how many changes, no matter how much time. i mean, i went to visit this beezy from the other side of the bloody country. it really puts things in perspective for all the friendships i find absolutely meaningful in my life. i'm completely grateful.
i cried an hour into the plane ride back.
i cried a tad bit when elyza dropped me off home.
fuckin' had a HELLAAAA good time in blostonian territory.
i just woke up from a three hour nap, falling asleep to slow jams.
and, it's not over.