NIMH does the smart thing, ditches the DSM
The National Institute of Mental Health is abandoning the DSM.
This is potentially monumental, and I've seen very little mention of it anywhere. Partly, I think, because people don't really grok how big a deal this is.
This is a very good thing, and for those who don't grasp why, I will try to explain. (Though the link does a really great job of ( Read more... )
This is potentially monumental, and I've seen very little mention of it anywhere. Partly, I think, because people don't really grok how big a deal this is.
This is a very good thing, and for those who don't grasp why, I will try to explain. (Though the link does a really great job of ( Read more... )
I am FASCINATED by your guides, because YOUR whole deal is so different from MY whole deal, yet. . . .
It's just really cool. I find the whole thing amazing. I want to hug your girls. And am super-curious about the potential fourth. I'm sure she'll show up when it's time.
I know a lot of people believe in "their" guardian angel who shows up when shit gets real, and I can't help thinking that's a version of what you experience.
To their credit, every professional I have confessed this to, after listening to me describe what it is and how it works, has been impressed with the strength of the coping response, and has agreed with me that it's a healthy, sustainable, workable solution to a problem that medicine simply cannot at this time solve or even, to any great degree, alleviate. Granted, they could be putting something totally different in the notes, I don't know, but they don't seem to think it's maladaptive, at least.
The only flaw in the system is that without regular external interaction (roleplaying, frequent acknowledged conversation with anyone other than me) they fade. They get replaced by new people, yes, but it's still a bit disturbing and sad. I'm not fond of that part.
At this point, though, the Baron has been with me as long as or longer than the next front-runner. And he assures me he's sticking around for a while yet, since I need him (and since, roleplaying-wise, he's waiting for a massive shoe to drop -- his mistress is pregnant and FFS IS IT A BOY? IS IT A GIRL? IS IT A MAN-GOAT? WHAT?! GIVE ME TEH FRKIN' BABBY -- and we haven't gotten back to him in more than a year). He also says he won't leave until someone else is around can handle the job, at which point he assures me I won't be disturbed if things change, so. . . . He's never, ever given me bad advice, or wrong advice, so I guess I believe him.
One of the most surreal things that ever happened with it was a character writing me a Dear Jane letter, saying "I'm going, it's time. You'll be fine, you don't need me any longer. Just, you know, keep walking. Still friends. Love, JM." And then he left. Just . . . took his hat, went out into the snow, and was never heard from again.
I still have that letter somewhere, I THINK. Bizarre.
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I would be SO HAPPY to discuss my girls with you. Come at me with questions, I don't care what they are!
When I first "met" Serena, I was in college, and I was playing a Vampire: The Masquerade tabletop game. I had to come up with a really good character, so I chose Toreador and named her Sirena, and she liked to soothe people and comfort people, even victims before feeding. She went through a couple of physical transformations. Originally she had red hair and yellow eyes.
After the game ended (because the guy who started it got arrested and dropped out of school, long story), Sirena stayed in my head. I was having seizures, and I was having pains, and I just shrugged it off as cerebral palsy stuff, and Serena was always there to hold me through it. She stopped being a glorious vampire and became an elf-like entity. I would have conversations with her. Sometimes, when I would socially drop LSD, she would actually come out and BE me. Like, "My name is not Joanna. I am Sirena" - and she was not me. She was kind of regal and elegant in a way that many people born into money and opulence are by instinct, and she was never haughty or anything. At heart she was like the ultimate nurse with a beautiful bedside manner. She was REAL inside me. She was someone I CREATED but she had a LIFE inside my mind. It was very obvious I did NOT have DID - when I told my doctors about it, they said, "It sounds like you have a very, very creative form of healthy multiplicity, a good coping mechanism."
Years later, she became Serena with an E, because, well, obvious. And her appearance changed to black hair, dark green eyes, and a naturally light bronze complexion. Like one of her ancestors was from India (Chakma, I think; makes me want to really research Theravada). Funny that I still don't know her last name. Funny, also, that she uses many Ayurvedic techniques when helping me cope. She is one huge reason I started getting into holistics and ancient medicine.
Oooh! Sometimes I would find notes I wrote to myself, signed by Serena! That's so interesting that I am not the only one.
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Back atcha.
and she liked to soothe people and comfort people, even victims before feeding.
That sounds SO MUCH like some of the characters I have had. Some of the most unlikely characters have had powerful nurturing/protecting instincts. Eve, the evil superheroine?* Mama bear all OVER the place. Literally the last thing I expected out of her, but turned out to be a core feature of her personality. I liked her a lot better after I realized that.
And then there's Horatio, who is one of the primaries, and is like . . . ice cream and backrubs, and is pretty much essence of "let me help" and nurturing and loving and generally being like the nicest person EVER. It's not surprising coming from him . . . he's a nice kid . . . but I've never had a character so genuinely good and sweet and playful at heart, and it's really odd having him around because he has an innocence and a trustingness that none of the others have ever had -- that *I* don't have. He feels really bad about injuring someone who was probably going to kill him, FFS. IDEK what's going to happen when it gets to be time, game-wise, for him to actually have to fight bad guys and potentially kill someone. Poor pup. :(
She was someone I CREATED but she had a LIFE inside my mind. It was very obvious I did NOT have DID - when I told my doctors about it, they said, "It sounds like you have a very, very creative form of healthy multiplicity, a good coping mechanism."
^ Exactly that.
I'm curious about Serena in that she has evolved from the original source. Does she still have a backstory? I mean, has that evolved, too, or is she more of a presence whose existence is now completely created by and living inside you, and not derived from or referring to any other continuum/outside-of-you reality/storyline? Jesus. I am not sure that question made sense. It makes sense in my head.
It's just . . . when it's a thing that you cultivate deliberately, you're aware of the character's origins, and I'm wondering if that changes for you, because it never has for me. A LOT of them -- most, by a huge majority -- never get past the fourth wall; they may be aware of me -- some aren't -- but aren't aware of the existence of this world as separate from theirs. At best, I could describe their awareness of me, the ones I talk to but who don't understand what they are, as being like . . . they are interacting with me while *they* are in a dream state, or like I'm an imaginary part of them, to them. Part of this is partitioning, I think, because there's the issue of What is Canon. Most are RPG characters; time moves in fits and starts for them, and too much tampering risks changing them from them as a character to them as the person I interact with, separately.
But then I can have someone like the Baron, who does not give me a choice about it. Who is like, "I see you there, I know who you are, and I know how this works. Thanks for letting me access your brains, btw. Makes it much easier. Now I know as much about your world as you do. Now, here's what we have to do. . . ." He is explicitly aware of all of it, and will interact with the others, too, with ZERO fucks given about continuum or timeline or anything. He'll play with people on the internet, sometimes.
And all of it sounds completely insane laid out like that, when it's really not as crazy as it sounds. It's just . . . discussing the interior mechanics of a very odd coping strategy that creates its own logic as it goes along. So it sounds REALLY bizarre.
*Yes, evil superheroine. Not supervillainess. Still evil, retired from being a villain, now working on more or less the same side as the good guys.
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Check out my latest post - it's all about answering and asking questions and such.
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I had a doctor put me, a KID, on lithium, thinking that the characters were multiple personalities. (LOL) ...I am VERY lucky that my Mother ran out of money once, and I was accidentally without it for a bit... when it wore off, I came out one morning for breakfast and was all, "You know what? It's a really NICE day out..." and Mom burst into tears because I had been a ZOMBIE since they put me on it- she got a second opinion, discovered characters are NOT the same as multiple personalities, and all was... saved.
I still roleplay- a lot of Vampire/WoD stuff, actually... but while My characters are me... I am not my character. ;)
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