The Leg-Biting Bitch Thinks Real Women Should Get Some Fucking Respect
This picture has been going around on Facebook, and I'm getting some serious rageface whenever anyone reposts it. Again. Maybe it's because I'm having a hard time not hating the way I look this month, so it's really in the forefront of my mind just how toxic this shit is.
I appreciate the fact that our culture demands ridiculous things of women and their bodies, and that a lot of skinny models and actresses may genuinely be wrestling with some sort of eating disorder (which is, by the way, not a valid reason to sneer at them) or may genuinely be at an unhealthy weight. Believe me. Look at this colossal ass. I was still "overweight" even when I was starving myself to death! Nobody appreciates the ugliness of our ideas about body shape and size more than I do. But this picture . . . seriously?
Tearing skinny women down is not going to make the world friendlier toward anyone's body. It does not make me feel better about my own body. It does not make me feel good at all. It makes me angry. It hurts me. It makes me sad. It makes me wonder what the fuck is wrong with everyone who responded with "RIGHT ON!" or "THIS!" or "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES!" that they can't see that they are spreading the same body-hating bullshit they claim offends them. For all y'all's sake, I'm going to assume that if you were one of those people, you just weren't thinking.
Breaking news:
Women of ALL sizes are subjected to pressure and shame about their bodies. That goes for thin, thick, and in-between, even for women with bodies you personally think are perfect. That "perfect" woman? She gets shit from someone about how she looks -- probably most of all from herself. We ALL get shit for it. It hurts ALL of us. Whether we listen or not, whether we believe it or not, we are ALL told we are not good enough, somehow, every day. Putting down one group of women DOES. NOT. HELP.
Saying there's something wrong with thinking thin women are attractive is just as fucked as saying there's something wrong with thinking fat women are attractive. What I think is attractive and what you think is attractive and what that person over there thinks is attractive and what that priapic dog in the street thinks is attractive are complete irrelevancies. People thinking I am attractive does not make me a better person, or excuse any features that in a fuckable person might be sorta okay but are otherwise considered undesirable.
Also, size acceptance is not about who is hot and who is hotter. Being considered hot is not what chicks, fat or thin, ultimately want. I mean, it's nice to be considered attractive, but it's not the be-all end-all. It's not what confers or denies our humanity.
And, finally, asking people to accept people for the size that they are does not mean forcing anyone to find fat people (or thin ones, or ones with curly hair) attractive. Imposing standards of attractiveness on other people is not what size acceptance is about. We kind of want the opposite of that. And, frankly, if you are the kind of person who needs to find someone fuckable before you will treat them with respect, I hope your next affair with a camel gives you projectile leprosy of the junk.
I realize with all of this "We'd appreciate it awfully if you could maybe not act like an asshole!" it's pretty confusing in here. What do fat people want?
What we WANT is to be seen as people. Not as a health risk because of our size, not as part of an epidemic because of our size, not as a burden on America because of our size, not an object of ridicule because of our size, not even as a sex object because of our size. People. Not because of our size, not in spite of it. Just. People.
We WANT people to step the fuck off and stop acting like it's okay to be heavy IF you are healthy or trying to eat right or exercising well or if someone thinks you're sexy, but somehow not okay to be heavy if you are unhealthy and eat junk food and never exercise and aren't sexy at all.
We WANT this "good fatty/bad fatty" fuckery to stop. Seriously. If you think I'm gross and are all up in my shit because whenever I want to, I eat chocolate cookies and ice cream and burgers and Cheetos and 'cause I drink non-diet Coke, but would lay off and show some respect if I ate naught but fresh-plucked greens harvested from the slopes of Mount Olympus and tender baby swans braised with the tears of happy virgins and drank only water from the Well of Insufferable Perfection, because then I would at least be *trying* not to be fat at you?
If you are that person? If you think I have some kind of obligation to not be fat because it's bad for me or costs imaginary people imaginary money?
Fuck. Off. I do not want anything to do with you. You. Are. A. Douchebag. GTFO.
We WANT people not to harass or deride us about what kind of bodies we have, whether they are considered sexy or not, because our bodies are not fucking public property and do not exist for others' viewing pleasure -- they are ours, they are the only bodies we have or are ever going to get, and what someone's body looks like does not ever, ever excuse treating them with a lack of respect.
If you think that it's my job to entertain you by being attractive or by serving as the butt of your jokes . . . GTFO. I'd also like to invite you to shove a flaming chainsaw up your ass and do a little dance on the way out. You know. For my entertainment.
I'm not going to say that thin women have it just as bad as fat women. I'm also not going to say that they don't. I'm not going to say that women in the middle are the ones who are lucky. This is not the Pain Olympics, and we aren't competing for prizes in competitive self-loathing. It doesn't matter who has it worse on the whole, or individually, because these are things that nobody should have to feel. Not even a little bit. Skinny women don't somehow deserve it just a little less than fatties. Fatties don't magically deserve it more. Nobody deserves it, because we are all equal in one regard:
People. We are them. Deal with it.
And yes, you may link the fuck out of this if you feel so inclined.
X-posted from Dreamwidth. Comment count: