I am so sorry for your loss. I had a traumatic near-loss 13 years ago, a week before Christmas. It took many years for me to be able to enjoy the holiday without anxiety. Treat yourself gently and take your time.
I lost my mom last Thanksgiving. You describe the emotions or rather lack of in the fog of grief that follows perfectly. A well done entry. So very well written.
There will come a time that you will think about your mother with less sadness. I won't say that it will stop hurting. It is not my mother I've yet lost, but a sibling and I still have paralyzing moments of grief after 17 years. But that's me.
I am so very sorry for your loss. I will not say I know exactly how you feel. Oh, I hate it when people say that. But I am sorry you are so sad, and grieving, and that it is probably infinitely harder for it to be NOW, when the rest of the world is a blur of bright lights and jingling bells.
Someone else said be gentle with yourself. I think that's good advice. I'm hugging you, in my heart.
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I am so very sorry for your loss. I will not say I know exactly how you feel. Oh, I hate it when people say that. But I am sorry you are so sad, and grieving, and that it is probably infinitely harder for it to be NOW, when the rest of the world is a blur of bright lights and jingling bells.
Someone else said be gentle with yourself. I think that's good advice. I'm hugging you, in my heart.
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Anything I say right now is going to be trite, but it does also happen to be true that it gets easier with time. It never goes, but it gets easier.
Another one adding to the gentleness. Allow yourself time. Plenty of it.
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