Fic: Just What I'm Going Through (They Can't Understand) 1/1
Just What I'm Going Through (They Can't Understand)
Word Count: 559
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I can't own anything. The pygmies and debt collectors own me.
Summary: The choices and consequences continue. Living with them isn't easy.
Pairing: Don/Megan, mentions of past Megan/Larry
Author's Note: Like all in this series, title is off a lyric from "Nights in White Satin" by the Moody Blues. This follows Never Meaning to Say, Thoughts They Cannot Defend, Letters I've Written, and Reaching the End.
Also, this qualifies as a piece for the April Showers challenge I issued over at n3_donmegan .
Just What I'm Going Through (They Can't Understand)
"Don? I've got that evaluation you wanted on the Morris brothers."
He didn't look away from the window, his face a hard mask as he studied the rain. Megan sighed as she watched him for a moment, turning the file over in her hands. "Leave it on the desk."
"Aren't you even going to look at me?"
"I can't," he whispered quietly, his voice full of the same anguish that was eating her up inside. They had known this would be hard, but it would have been worse to stay together. The guilt was destroying them, pushing them apart. It was always going to come to this. "You know I can't."
"The others are starting to talk. If we can't work together anymore-"
"I'll approve whatever transfer you want. Hell, I'd send myself somewhere if I thought it would help."
"Don, your family is here. Charlie, Alan... They need you."
He nodded again, still studying the rain. His hand reached out to touch the glass, and she thought the recent storm very fitting. The sky seemed to be crying all the tears that neither of them would allow themselves to shed. "You shouldn't have to leave."
"Maybe I do," she said, taking a deep breath. "Maybe that's what's for the best. If we can't work together anymore..."
"It's not that I can't work with you," Don disagreed. This time he did look back at her, and she saw so much in his eyes, pain and guilt and longing. "It's that every time I see you, I want what we had back. I want to go back and fix this. I want to hold you-and I can't."
"So I should go."
"No," he said, his voice full of so many things. She could hear it, it was like a plea. Then he let out a sigh. "Yes."
She nodded. "The report's on your desk."
He looked down at the desk and then turned back to the window. Megan sighed again and left the room quietly. David and Colby looked up from their desks, watching her. She shook her head as she headed for the elevator.
Colby jogged to catch up with her. "Hey, Megan, if there's something going on with Don-"
She shook her head. "Nothing's going on with Don."
"Yeah, right. Look, we might not know all the details, but we know something's going on with the two of you, and if-I just wanted to say, if you need someone to talk to Don or something, I'd be willing to do it. Or David. We just want to help."
She glanced over at David, who had gotten up from his chair and gone into talk to Don. She knew that they meant well, both of them did, but what had happened between her and Don, while also affecting Larry, was not common knowledge. It must have confused them, to have her and Don go from playful and happy to... this. It was like a switch had been thrown, something sudden. They didn't know how long it had been building up to this.
"I appreciate the offer, Colby, really, but there's nothing you can do."
Colby and David were good men. Good teammates. Good friends. Still... They didn't understand.