chocolate..is pretty gross
It really sucks. Everything seems so damn deceiving. I attempt to go to people to confide in, who I was formally friends with before they all became, so-called "popular". And they're just different. Not all there. But on the surface, got up in who got drunk last week and who screwed who. It's just not important. I got to people and talk with them just to let everything out, in hopes they'll actually listen, and in return, they could come to me and talk about something that's bothering them. I suppose this is just one to the many things I haven't come to reason about.
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For a while I didn't like you. I suppose it was just because you put on an act and they began talking down towards you. An act that hid the person who you really are just to be noticed, to be picked, and to be cool. I constantly felt they were shoving you off onto me. Forcing me to team up with you consistantly. I hated the fact that they did that. Hated the fact you lied to yourself just to fit in. I never completely understood why you lied to yourself for so long. You thought they were your friends, but what you didn't know never hurt. I tried to stick up for you the best I could. I tried to find an excuse of why you acted in such a manner. As corny as it sounds, I almost feel as if I told you that it was alright to be yourself. It was okay to be different, and not exactly fit in. And in time I felt that you did. I was your friend, and I thought you were mine. What you did wasn't exactly nice. I felt like the air was then poisoned with neglect. But who's to judge? Maybe it was an inane situation, but at the same time, it was the principle. And now you ignore me, excluding the times when you feel its safe to talk to me. I feel like I put so much effort into you, making sure you knew that it was alright to stand out and be different, instead of following everyone elses bitterness pathways. Friends usually tell each other things, but I suppose he's 2 months late news. I find it awkward to speak to you now. Things are different. In a way I feel guilty for saying all this, but I really thought you were something different. However, today I realize that your just the same, and im sorry..
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For a while I didn't like you. I suppose it was just because you put on an act and they began talking down towards you. An act that hid the person who you really are just to be noticed, to be picked, and to be cool. I constantly felt they were shoving you off onto me. Forcing me to team up with you consistantly. I hated the fact that they did that. Hated the fact you lied to yourself just to fit in. I never completely understood why you lied to yourself for so long. You thought they were your friends, but what you didn't know never hurt. I tried to stick up for you the best I could. I tried to find an excuse of why you acted in such a manner. As corny as it sounds, I almost feel as if I told you that it was alright to be yourself. It was okay to be different, and not exactly fit in. And in time I felt that you did. I was your friend, and I thought you were mine. What you did wasn't exactly nice. I felt like the air was then poisoned with neglect. But who's to judge? Maybe it was an inane situation, but at the same time, it was the principle. And now you ignore me, excluding the times when you feel its safe to talk to me. I feel like I put so much effort into you, making sure you knew that it was alright to stand out and be different, instead of following everyone elses bitterness pathways. Friends usually tell each other things, but I suppose he's 2 months late news. I find it awkward to speak to you now. Things are different. In a way I feel guilty for saying all this, but I really thought you were something different. However, today I realize that your just the same, and im sorry..