Sunday Bloody Sunday
Today should be a bad day.
My World, My Sky was due yesterday. As of Christmas, it was only halfway finished. Why? Because of a lack of knowledge.
Being ignored by Dave, not talking to Zam, and being in a different mindset from when I began the piece... I attribute all of this to the reason why it is not done.
When I began this work, I believed that the main three obstacles in my character's life were drugs, society, and himself. I've now come to believe that the ONLY obstacle in this man's life is himself. A man can stop from lighting a cigarette before he can change who he truly is. I don't believe my character ever really does change from his original being, but goes through different phases and realizations throughout the story, all being seperate pieces of his original purpose!
I'm not saying that I'm not to be blamed for the incomplete story; I have been loathing adding on to this piece. I love this story, I have poured my heart and soul into getting every line of dialoge and thought from my characters to be FROM my characters, but this is a more distant love.
I am totally and completely against drug and alcohol abuse. I've been sXe for some time now, and I just can't see myself forcing some other God-fearing being to become the chain smoker, heroin junkie, and sex addict just for the sake of realism within my work. I have to find someone who believes in this work just as much as I do to "finish" the tale. Of course, I will finish it, but as far as getting actors, cameras... I just don't know. If I find someone who can and desires to be my character who achieves the narcotic highs and wallows to the aftermath's depressive state, then yes. My World, My Sky will be seen. I'll just say that when I do find this poor soul... I do hope there is some form of a God to help me.
So now I wait. I will take time from the work. Other things I can feel now and I will take time to consider them. I have thought quite a bit about doing a piece inspired by Distorted Lullabies. The idea of doing a short story has also been gnawing at me. We'll just have to see what will happen then, won't we?
As for the nonce... I feel a bit better. Christmachaunakwanzaa was nice. I got some new bootlegs, if I may brag:
Jeff Buckley live @ The Music Faucet, WFMU in NJ 11.10.92
Jeff Buckley live @ The Rosklide Festival 6.30.95
Jeff Buckley live @ The Knitting Factory 2.4.97
Jeff Buckley live @ The Garage 1.9.94
Jeff Buckley live @ X, Atlanta GA 8.6.? [If anyone has info on this I'd greatly appreciate it, the setlist is: last goodbye, so real, mojo pin, grace, and lover.]
The Cure live sessions @ AOL 6.7.04
Between this, the countless Ours bootlegs, and a few others I have laying around [more Jeff Buckley, Joy Division, Smiths, Rasputina, etc.] my collection is really rounding out. I'm a happy girl.
xox
mer
My World, My Sky was due yesterday. As of Christmas, it was only halfway finished. Why? Because of a lack of knowledge.
Being ignored by Dave, not talking to Zam, and being in a different mindset from when I began the piece... I attribute all of this to the reason why it is not done.
When I began this work, I believed that the main three obstacles in my character's life were drugs, society, and himself. I've now come to believe that the ONLY obstacle in this man's life is himself. A man can stop from lighting a cigarette before he can change who he truly is. I don't believe my character ever really does change from his original being, but goes through different phases and realizations throughout the story, all being seperate pieces of his original purpose!
I'm not saying that I'm not to be blamed for the incomplete story; I have been loathing adding on to this piece. I love this story, I have poured my heart and soul into getting every line of dialoge and thought from my characters to be FROM my characters, but this is a more distant love.
I am totally and completely against drug and alcohol abuse. I've been sXe for some time now, and I just can't see myself forcing some other God-fearing being to become the chain smoker, heroin junkie, and sex addict just for the sake of realism within my work. I have to find someone who believes in this work just as much as I do to "finish" the tale. Of course, I will finish it, but as far as getting actors, cameras... I just don't know. If I find someone who can and desires to be my character who achieves the narcotic highs and wallows to the aftermath's depressive state, then yes. My World, My Sky will be seen. I'll just say that when I do find this poor soul... I do hope there is some form of a God to help me.
So now I wait. I will take time from the work. Other things I can feel now and I will take time to consider them. I have thought quite a bit about doing a piece inspired by Distorted Lullabies. The idea of doing a short story has also been gnawing at me. We'll just have to see what will happen then, won't we?
As for the nonce... I feel a bit better. Christmachaunakwanzaa was nice. I got some new bootlegs, if I may brag:
Jeff Buckley live @ The Music Faucet, WFMU in NJ 11.10.92
Jeff Buckley live @ The Rosklide Festival 6.30.95
Jeff Buckley live @ The Knitting Factory 2.4.97
Jeff Buckley live @ The Garage 1.9.94
Jeff Buckley live @ X, Atlanta GA 8.6.? [If anyone has info on this I'd greatly appreciate it, the setlist is: last goodbye, so real, mojo pin, grace, and lover.]
The Cure live sessions @ AOL 6.7.04
Between this, the countless Ours bootlegs, and a few others I have laying around [more Jeff Buckley, Joy Division, Smiths, Rasputina, etc.] my collection is really rounding out. I'm a happy girl.
xox
mer