(no subject)
Today I have tried to find a job. Do you know after 18 years and making 55k a year I am only worth about $10.00 an hour. It is fucking depressing. It is finally hitting me today that I am unemployed. I need to figure out a resume and shit like that. Holly started out being supportive but I think she was hiding how she really felt. The comments she makes, the arguments we are starting to have. She is like I don't care where you have to get a job you need to get a job. Why don't you look around by your parents (5 1/2) hours away. Shes like I know plenty of married people who don't live together and work in different states. I'm sorry that's not me. I will not move away from my family. If she wants to get rid of me because I am a fuck up then she needs to say it. She has no clue what I am fucking feeling right now. I can't even provide for my family anymore and when I was employed I was barely able to help out as it was. I am unemployed, I have medical problems, I bedroom problems because of my medical problems, I suck as a dad, I suck as a husband I just don't know what to do. I AM SCARED!!!!!!