PIRATES OF THE CARRIBBEAN 2
BAD THINGS:
1) 1st 45 minutes sucked
2) Recycling of old jokes in first 45 minutes was especially bad
3) Keira Knightley looks incredibly ugly super-tan
4) UM HAY GUYS HOW ABOUT WE MAKE CTHULU DAVY JONES DO WHAT WE WANT AND THEN KILL HIM HUH DOESN'T THAT MAKE SENSE? NO? LET'S FIGHT ON A WATER WHEEL.
5) Either the ending DIDN'T MAKE ANY SENSE or Ornaldo gets happy and sad confused, because he seemed really glad that Jack was dead to me and then he is all LET'S GO GET HIM. I don't think Elizabeth really has a big thing for Jack, I think she just felt bad for you know KILLING HIM LOLOLOL.
6) Lame double entendres. Will/Elizabeth one was just super awkward due to incredible lack of chemistry and out-of-character-ness, Jack/Elizabeth one was gross GUYS HE COULD BE HER DAD.
7) The ending setup was ridiculous seriously, try being a little less "OMG SEQUEL."
GOOD THINGS:
1) Norrington as gruff drunken SUPERBABE. HOTTER THAN JOHNNY DEPP GUYS, SERIOUSLY.
2) Ragetti and Pintel lololololz.
3) CTHULU. Bill Nighy was super adorable although he did not reach Geoffrey Rush hamming-it-up heights.
4) Tia Dalma
5) Tom Hollander being the shortest person I've ever seen.
6) Good one-liners yay!
7) LOL THE DECEPTICONS TOOK OUT THE MARS ROVER. TRANSFORMERS IS GOING TO SUCK HARD.
1) 1st 45 minutes sucked
2) Recycling of old jokes in first 45 minutes was especially bad
3) Keira Knightley looks incredibly ugly super-tan
4) UM HAY GUYS HOW ABOUT WE MAKE CTHULU DAVY JONES DO WHAT WE WANT AND THEN KILL HIM HUH DOESN'T THAT MAKE SENSE? NO? LET'S FIGHT ON A WATER WHEEL.
5) Either the ending DIDN'T MAKE ANY SENSE or Ornaldo gets happy and sad confused, because he seemed really glad that Jack was dead to me and then he is all LET'S GO GET HIM. I don't think Elizabeth really has a big thing for Jack, I think she just felt bad for you know KILLING HIM LOLOLOL.
6) Lame double entendres. Will/Elizabeth one was just super awkward due to incredible lack of chemistry and out-of-character-ness, Jack/Elizabeth one was gross GUYS HE COULD BE HER DAD.
7) The ending setup was ridiculous seriously, try being a little less "OMG SEQUEL."
GOOD THINGS:
1) Norrington as gruff drunken SUPERBABE. HOTTER THAN JOHNNY DEPP GUYS, SERIOUSLY.
2) Ragetti and Pintel lololololz.
3) CTHULU. Bill Nighy was super adorable although he did not reach Geoffrey Rush hamming-it-up heights.
4) Tia Dalma
5) Tom Hollander being the shortest person I've ever seen.
6) Good one-liners yay!
7) LOL THE DECEPTICONS TOOK OUT THE MARS ROVER. TRANSFORMERS IS GOING TO SUCK HARD.