erm...
have you ever had the experience of going awol on literally everyone you know and when you start to pull out of it you feel like there is no way anyone is going to even want to hear from you?
the last 9 months have been really effing stressful and I am someone who doesn't always realize it when I am under a lot of stress. but I realized it today and I am trying to stop beating myself up about how things are.
I took a shower and I got in pool and paid my taxes and I talked to two people on the phone that I believe actually like me a lot and it's given me the zha to come to LJ and say hiii
it's hard being back with family. that ol' wolf pack power dynamic comes back hard and here I am the zeta-est zeta that ever zeta-ed. (that's really a disservice to wolves as their packs are actually very well run and they take very good care of each other.)
I think I may be able to find some pet-sitters! (anyone got some extra felix?) I weirdly forgot that I have 5 or is it 6 nieces and nephews from my ex's side and perhaps one of them will be interested in a side gig. I'm hoping they never find out that I don't know how many there are. if they'll help me out I can start taking some small trips to see more people who like me :) and laugh at my jokes and don't get mad when I name-drop, which I know is lame but is sometimes necessary to get the idea across.
ANYWAY, I'm off to do pet chores and then pet snuggling in bed :)
Love you guys and I hope to get back in this again sooooon!
*also sneaking in the second-story window at dreamwidth
the last 9 months have been really effing stressful and I am someone who doesn't always realize it when I am under a lot of stress. but I realized it today and I am trying to stop beating myself up about how things are.
I took a shower and I got in pool and paid my taxes and I talked to two people on the phone that I believe actually like me a lot and it's given me the zha to come to LJ and say hiii
it's hard being back with family. that ol' wolf pack power dynamic comes back hard and here I am the zeta-est zeta that ever zeta-ed. (that's really a disservice to wolves as their packs are actually very well run and they take very good care of each other.)
I think I may be able to find some pet-sitters! (anyone got some extra felix?) I weirdly forgot that I have 5 or is it 6 nieces and nephews from my ex's side and perhaps one of them will be interested in a side gig. I'm hoping they never find out that I don't know how many there are. if they'll help me out I can start taking some small trips to see more people who like me :) and laugh at my jokes and don't get mad when I name-drop, which I know is lame but is sometimes necessary to get the idea across.
ANYWAY, I'm off to do pet chores and then pet snuggling in bed :)
Love you guys and I hope to get back in this again sooooon!
*also sneaking in the second-story window at dreamwidth