2015: A year in reflection
I have mixed feelings about New Year's resolutions. On one hand, I realize that they're a common tradition associated with the turning of an old year into a new year and the personal changes that we want to effect in our lives throughout; on the other hand, I realize that comparatively few people keep their resolutions, and I don't think that people who are serious about changing their lives should devote only one day out of the year to conducting a personal audit and deciding what they need to work on improving.
However, I'm not interested in stripping the excitement out of my dear readers' lives with a reductio ad absurdum argument against maintaining holiday traditions. Such traditions are what set holidays apart from regular days, and a world that never enjoyed special celebrations or gave its civilized inhabitants opportunities to stay home from work and school would be a sad and joyless place. Instead, I'd like to share an anecdote about my own New Year's Eve experience, as well as a personal tradition that I've continued for the last 12 years.
This year, my mom came up with an alternative to making New Year's resolutions: burning away negativity. She wrote down several things on a piece of paper that she wanted to disappear from her and her children's lives, and my brother and I wrote down three things we wanted to disappear from our lives. These were supposed to be negative circumstances or traits, so we weren't allowed to mention, say, our brother-in-law (though the temptation was strong). After writing them, we lit a fire, threw them in the fireplace, and watched them burn, symbolically swearing to eschew or take steps to change them in the coming year. One could argue that this act was just a more time-consuming and destructive way of making New Year's resolutions, but I say that if it involved fire, it can only be an improvement.
Aside from that, I spent the end of 2015 and the beginning of 2016 in my room with a bottle of champagne, knocking soldiers out and spiriting them away with balloons in Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain and occasionally responding to text messages, status updates, and engagement announcements on Facebook. Not a bad way to end the year, I'd say.
While 2015 did not end badly, it had its share of disappointments. I lost contact with a good friend and kindred spirit. I did not do nearly as well as I could have at keeping in touch with other friends, especially those from overseas. I did not keep the promise I made to do some creative writing every day, though I was much better about it than I have been in the past. I spent more time than I would have liked creating and editing Wikia pages instead of creating something original. I was not as patient with or polite to my nephew as I should have been. I did not invest any of the money I've been saving or find a place of my own to live. And the full-time position I tried to prove myself worthy of getting at HCC may be nothing more than a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow.
However, I have more reasons to be proud of or happy about the events of 2015 than I have reasons to be disappointed. I visited Portland. I met some new friends in Houston. I made some forays into the dating scene that didn't end terribly. I got to continue working at a place that offers me almost everything I want out of a job and saw two of my family members find new jobs after being unemployed for part of the year. I watched my students earn certificates and blossom into more capable, confident speakers of English. I finally beat Dragon Age: Inquisition. I finished another award-winning FAQ. I added some chapters to my novel while getting helpful feedback from people who were willing to read it (and collected a lot more material for a future writing project). And I am fortunate that - for the time being, at least - I have a living and working arrangement that makes it easy for me to save money while doing the things that are interesting and important to me.
And, of course, I learned and relearned many lessons, including the ones below:
-We're each on our own timetable.
-Developing true and justified confidence takes years of work.
-The satisfaction I get from my old hobbies changes as I grow older.
-Support and connections sometimes come from the places we least expect.
-Narcissism may be one of the most dangerous personality disorders known to man.
-Even the people we vehemently disagree with may have valuable lessons to teach us.
-The dating game keeps changing, and I always feel like I'm at least one step behind.
-If you're content to be by yourself and do the things you enjoy, happiness will follow.
-The people who will stick with me no matter how crazy my life becomes are the ones I most want and need in it.
Above all else, 2015 was a year of potential, some of which I realized and some of which I did not. Here's hoping that 2016 will be a year when all of us realize more of what we're capable of accomplishing. That's the best that anyone can do.
However, I'm not interested in stripping the excitement out of my dear readers' lives with a reductio ad absurdum argument against maintaining holiday traditions. Such traditions are what set holidays apart from regular days, and a world that never enjoyed special celebrations or gave its civilized inhabitants opportunities to stay home from work and school would be a sad and joyless place. Instead, I'd like to share an anecdote about my own New Year's Eve experience, as well as a personal tradition that I've continued for the last 12 years.
This year, my mom came up with an alternative to making New Year's resolutions: burning away negativity. She wrote down several things on a piece of paper that she wanted to disappear from her and her children's lives, and my brother and I wrote down three things we wanted to disappear from our lives. These were supposed to be negative circumstances or traits, so we weren't allowed to mention, say, our brother-in-law (though the temptation was strong). After writing them, we lit a fire, threw them in the fireplace, and watched them burn, symbolically swearing to eschew or take steps to change them in the coming year. One could argue that this act was just a more time-consuming and destructive way of making New Year's resolutions, but I say that if it involved fire, it can only be an improvement.
Aside from that, I spent the end of 2015 and the beginning of 2016 in my room with a bottle of champagne, knocking soldiers out and spiriting them away with balloons in Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain and occasionally responding to text messages, status updates, and engagement announcements on Facebook. Not a bad way to end the year, I'd say.
While 2015 did not end badly, it had its share of disappointments. I lost contact with a good friend and kindred spirit. I did not do nearly as well as I could have at keeping in touch with other friends, especially those from overseas. I did not keep the promise I made to do some creative writing every day, though I was much better about it than I have been in the past. I spent more time than I would have liked creating and editing Wikia pages instead of creating something original. I was not as patient with or polite to my nephew as I should have been. I did not invest any of the money I've been saving or find a place of my own to live. And the full-time position I tried to prove myself worthy of getting at HCC may be nothing more than a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow.
However, I have more reasons to be proud of or happy about the events of 2015 than I have reasons to be disappointed. I visited Portland. I met some new friends in Houston. I made some forays into the dating scene that didn't end terribly. I got to continue working at a place that offers me almost everything I want out of a job and saw two of my family members find new jobs after being unemployed for part of the year. I watched my students earn certificates and blossom into more capable, confident speakers of English. I finally beat Dragon Age: Inquisition. I finished another award-winning FAQ. I added some chapters to my novel while getting helpful feedback from people who were willing to read it (and collected a lot more material for a future writing project). And I am fortunate that - for the time being, at least - I have a living and working arrangement that makes it easy for me to save money while doing the things that are interesting and important to me.
And, of course, I learned and relearned many lessons, including the ones below:
-We're each on our own timetable.
-Developing true and justified confidence takes years of work.
-The satisfaction I get from my old hobbies changes as I grow older.
-Support and connections sometimes come from the places we least expect.
-Narcissism may be one of the most dangerous personality disorders known to man.
-Even the people we vehemently disagree with may have valuable lessons to teach us.
-The dating game keeps changing, and I always feel like I'm at least one step behind.
-If you're content to be by yourself and do the things you enjoy, happiness will follow.
-The people who will stick with me no matter how crazy my life becomes are the ones I most want and need in it.
Above all else, 2015 was a year of potential, some of which I realized and some of which I did not. Here's hoping that 2016 will be a year when all of us realize more of what we're capable of accomplishing. That's the best that anyone can do.