Well, I'm updating
It has been a really long time. At first it was on purpose. I just decided that I didn't want to do live journal anymore. I got mad about something and...I don't know. Apparently the way I dealt with it was to screw LJ, plus no one really updates frequently anymore. Anyway, I'm updating now just because I went here looking for surveys and couldn't resist.
I am busy. And it's not my fault that I can't make time to do things. There is no time. My alarm goes off at 5:05am 5 days a week. I don't get out of bed until 5:30 every day because it has become increasingly difficult to get out of bed. I get to work at 6am and work until 2:00. Wait. I'm supposed to work until 2:00, but I never leave then. It's usually 2:30, sometimes even 3:00 because they just keep putting kids into my room and ignore the fact that there isn't enough coverage. I am beyond stressed. They are ignoring the problems in my room. It is terrible. We need another person, but no one cares. They just want money. So what if there is now 16 2 year olds enrolled in my room and only 2 consistent teachers? So what if we keep having to put a random, incompetent person into the room? So what if the one other consistent teacher is going to be out for the next 2 weeks for two different surgeries. I want to die.
Then I have class and/or the gym. It's not really a gym. It's a fitness place that friends opened up. My dad has a couple karate classes and I take kickboxing and boxing. I work out for 2 hours on Tues, Wednesday and Thursday. On Mondays, I have a class from 6:00-9:30 and Tuesdays from 4:00-6:30. I also have a class on Sunday mornings. As you can see, there is one day where I am completely free. This time usually fills up with something family oriented, Nicole, or babysitting for my parents.
I feel like people are mad at me because I didn't make an effort. I also feel like people aren't seeing the effort that I did make. And that maybe I shouldn't be the only one to make the effort.
I'm back to doubting everything that I'm doing. I, once again, no longer know what I want. I'm unhappy...again.
I am busy. And it's not my fault that I can't make time to do things. There is no time. My alarm goes off at 5:05am 5 days a week. I don't get out of bed until 5:30 every day because it has become increasingly difficult to get out of bed. I get to work at 6am and work until 2:00. Wait. I'm supposed to work until 2:00, but I never leave then. It's usually 2:30, sometimes even 3:00 because they just keep putting kids into my room and ignore the fact that there isn't enough coverage. I am beyond stressed. They are ignoring the problems in my room. It is terrible. We need another person, but no one cares. They just want money. So what if there is now 16 2 year olds enrolled in my room and only 2 consistent teachers? So what if we keep having to put a random, incompetent person into the room? So what if the one other consistent teacher is going to be out for the next 2 weeks for two different surgeries. I want to die.
Then I have class and/or the gym. It's not really a gym. It's a fitness place that friends opened up. My dad has a couple karate classes and I take kickboxing and boxing. I work out for 2 hours on Tues, Wednesday and Thursday. On Mondays, I have a class from 6:00-9:30 and Tuesdays from 4:00-6:30. I also have a class on Sunday mornings. As you can see, there is one day where I am completely free. This time usually fills up with something family oriented, Nicole, or babysitting for my parents.
I feel like people are mad at me because I didn't make an effort. I also feel like people aren't seeing the effort that I did make. And that maybe I shouldn't be the only one to make the effort.
I'm back to doubting everything that I'm doing. I, once again, no longer know what I want. I'm unhappy...again.