CPR from Canada
Yesterday I didn't know if I had the strength to go on as a caregiver.
After a week of difficult, strategic physical therapy, a doctor's release and a positive care team meeting at the rehab facility, Mother began to crash on Saturday. The pain was increasing and she was having a hard time focusing. The doctor had added a muscle relaxant to her medication list to help with the muscle spasms that are increasing as she's starting to work those sleeping muscles. The hope is that the muscle relaxant would reduce the number of hydrocodone required. Unfortunately, by Sunday she was almost comatose. We couldn't wake her all day, not to eat and barely to take her pills. It felt like she was on a downward spiral and of course, I'm on that runaway train again trying to ensure she's not over-medicated, ascertain if it's just medication or a medical concern, and just simply watch over her. I was at the end of my rope. I found myself crying and praying for help most of the day.
Last night the phone rang. It was an online friend from Canada. We've never talked before, only exchanged e-mails and shared talk surrounding "House" on an online forum. Yet, here she was calling to offer encouragement, to help provide perspective and to make me laugh. She spent 3.5 hours talking with me, at first about Mother and my feelings, but mostly we just shared stories and memories. For a few hours I was reminded that I am more than a caregiver, but a person of interest...a person that matters.
Last night someone from Canada helped revive me; today the miles couldn't stop me from calling her friend.
After a week of difficult, strategic physical therapy, a doctor's release and a positive care team meeting at the rehab facility, Mother began to crash on Saturday. The pain was increasing and she was having a hard time focusing. The doctor had added a muscle relaxant to her medication list to help with the muscle spasms that are increasing as she's starting to work those sleeping muscles. The hope is that the muscle relaxant would reduce the number of hydrocodone required. Unfortunately, by Sunday she was almost comatose. We couldn't wake her all day, not to eat and barely to take her pills. It felt like she was on a downward spiral and of course, I'm on that runaway train again trying to ensure she's not over-medicated, ascertain if it's just medication or a medical concern, and just simply watch over her. I was at the end of my rope. I found myself crying and praying for help most of the day.
Last night the phone rang. It was an online friend from Canada. We've never talked before, only exchanged e-mails and shared talk surrounding "House" on an online forum. Yet, here she was calling to offer encouragement, to help provide perspective and to make me laugh. She spent 3.5 hours talking with me, at first about Mother and my feelings, but mostly we just shared stories and memories. For a few hours I was reminded that I am more than a caregiver, but a person of interest...a person that matters.
Last night someone from Canada helped revive me; today the miles couldn't stop me from calling her friend.