Falling Apart
Title: Falling Apart
Length: 1/4
Author: Wanwan
Rating: PG
Pairings: Akame (Akanishi Jin, Kamenashi Kazuya), with parts of KAT TUN
Summary: Love’s falling apart because of everything that cropped up. This sis a story of an unforgiven love… Is love so vulnerable to everything? What on earth happened to the love we once knew? Where’s the love that stood when the worst happened? Where’s the love that burns so strongly? Where’s the love that supported us when we are in the deepest darkness? The love that burns bright seemed to disappear into the darkness…Cold and fear engulfed as love began to disappear…Can love really withstand everything? Can love really create miracle?? I wonder…
The smell of antiseptic filled the room. The white walls painted fears and sadness. Lying on the white bed was a pretty young boy. Sitting next to him was a cool young man. The eyes of the young man looked hard at the pretty boy hoping that he would wake up soon. He often imagined his fingers twitching or perhaps that his eyes would flicker. He always hoped that he would wake up the next day. Looking at him like this was the only thing he would do. He refuses to move even he knew that he’s hurting himself. He just looks at his love. The tubes and needles on his love were really torturous to the young boy. He wanted to do everything that could ease the pain of his love. He felt really helpless when he looked at these apparatus that helped to keep his love breathing.
The brown heavy door opened. “Are you alright Akanishi?? You have been here all night? I think you need a little break, just leave Kame to us…we will look after him…go have a little rest…” Akanishi turned around and saw Yuichi. He smiled and returned his gaze at Kamenashi. Yuichi shook his head at Akanishi’s determination. He’s really hurting his body. He had been staying on without sleep and food for a few days. Yuichi looked at Taguchi who was sitting at the couch. They looked at each other and shook their heads. Yuichi went to the other side and found himself a seat.
Kame had been in a coma for 3 days. Akanishi had also been like this for 3 days. If not for that accident, he would not have been admitted here. Akanishi and Kame were walking down the streets of Shibuya when this terrible incident happened. They were window shopping when a young girl suddenly approach the two of them. She greeted them politely. Next, she turned and looked at Akanishi,” Hello Jin, my name is Ayumi…I am your fiancée…” Kame was dumbfounded. He didn’t believed what he heard. Akanishi was astonished too. It all happened so abruptly. Kame went forward and questioned the young girl, “Who are you? Why are you trying to mislead us?? I don’t believe your words!! You must be a fan girl!!” He got more and more agitated as he thought she was a fan girl trying to cheat them into believing her nonsense.
The young girl gave a cold stare at Kame and said coldly,” If you think I am a fan girl trying to get attention, you are wrong…I am Jin’s fiancée…That’s a solid truth…” Akanishi stood there dumbfounded as he heard the conversation of Kame with Ayumi. Ayumi could sense disbelieving in her. She decided to show them evidence and proof that she was the one. A car came to a halt next to them.
“If you don’t believe me…get on the car and I will drive you somewhere so that you would believe me…” with that, she went into the black limousine. The couple was too shocked for words. But, Akanishi decided to follow the girl. He dragged Kame along with him as they boarded the car. It was awkward silence on the car. The driver kept driving. Sitting next to the driver seat was Ayumi. She kept silent all the while. She felt that she need not talk anymore as the truth would be staring hard at them once they reach the place. At the back seats, Kame held onto Akanishi’s hand tightly. He had a sense of fear that he would lose him soon. He didn’t want that to happen. Akanishi somehow sensed his fears. He gave him a smile followed by a kiss to give him assurance. Ayumi looked at them with the help of the front mirror. She was really pissed off by their actions. Kame was not confident of holding his lover because Ayumi was way too pretty and poised. He was no match to her. After a a several minutes of ride, the car came to a stop. They reached their destination. Ayumi got down first, followed by the couples behind. Akanishi was shocked when he saw the place they were at. It was the place he had lived for the past 19 years before he debuted. The garden was filled with red roses. The grasses were as neatly mowed as he first left. He hadn’t been home since he went into the agency. Kame felt really scared as he was at an unfamiliar place. Akanishi turned to him and whispered,” This is my house….” Kame was shocked. This girl really knew Akanishi’s family well. The girl pushed open the door and walked into the house. It was a three storey mansion. Akanishi followed behind her while Kame walked the last. The girl brought them up the stairs to the second story where Akanishi’s parents were. They were enjoying themselves in the TV room.
“I am sorry to bother aunty and uncle…I have bought Akanishi here…he didn’t believe what I said…about our marriage…” The two old couple began to tone down and understood the problem. Ayumi opened the door and invited the young couple in. She went in first and sat at the couch directly opposite his parents. Akanishi and Kame went in the room. The old couple was shocked to see them two together. They were even holding hands. They were being intimate in their point of view. Akanishi was immediately stopped by his parents. His parents demanded Kame to sit at the side of the room while Akanishi sits next to Ayumi. His parents were obviously trying to separate them. Kame felt helpless as it was Jin’s parents. He didn’t want to be disrespectful to his lover’s parents. He let go of his hand and obediently went to that seat. Akanishi cleared his throat and began prompting his parents about this.
“Why!!?? Tell me why did you arrange a marriage for me??!!! I refuse this marri….” Even before he could finish his sentence, his father snapped,” Don’t even think of stopping this marriage…We are damn certain about this. You can do nothing to change our mind…” Akanishi was really angry. He began to shout at them,” I don’t care what you say…I am staying alone…” Kame was so shocked when Jin began to get angry. He seldom sees Jin so angry. Jin’s parents were calm. They seemed to expect his son to flare up. The calmly explained,” Why son? We all care about you…I don’t wish to see the newspaper reporters write nonsense bout you being a gay…”They gave a cold stare at Kame. Kame felt really sad. But, he dare not let his tears fall. Ayumi butt in saying,” Yeah…It’s true your parents hate to hear this report…they believed you…and did this to warn the newspaper reporters...” Kame was real sad as his parents did not accept him. They wanted their son to be normal and healthy like other boys. They did not want him to be in love with a man. He wanted him to fall in love the normal way, with a girl. Kame was really sad. He felt dirty. He felt discriminated.
Jin’s face went red with anger. He did not agree to his parents. He loved Kame and would not allow anyone to say bad about him. He shouted a the top of his voice,” You idiots…so what I the newspaper is true…so what I am a gay…so what if I love Kame…so what if you are going to stop me…so what if you force me to get married…NO WAY!!! NO WAY I AM MARRYING HER…” He pointed at the girl beside him. A crisp slap was heard. Before everyone could react, Jin’s face was slapped by his mother. It hurts but he held it down. He looked at his mother. She was silently shedding tears. He knew he had hurt his precious mother. Suddenly, Jin’s father got up from his seat and went up to Kame. It shocked him. He dare not look at his father who was standing in front of him. His father finally spoke after the awkward silence,” I hope that you will leave now…as you see. ..We are now sorting out some family matters…could you please leave us…” These words meant more than just asking him to leave, it also implies that they never would accept him as a family member. Although it really hurts him, all he could do is smile and hold back his tears.
“See you…uncle and aunty…sorry for imposing you…” With that, he stood up walked quickly out of the room.
“Kame…stop…don’t g…” before Akanishi could finish his sentence, the door was closed and Kame had left. Once Kame was out of the room, tears fell in torrents as he ran as quickly as he legs could take him. He wanted to run out of the mansion as soon as possible. It hurts to stay there any longer. He knew Akanishi was a filial son; he must be in a real situation now. He must be feeling real terrible now. Being sandwiched between his parents and him. Kame knew it was not right to fall in love with Jin. It was against the nature. Boy should love girl. Boy shouldn’t love boy. It’s against the rule. He continued running till he reached a river. His legs were tired and could no longer hold on. He collapses to the floor. It hurts. Love hurts. A lightening struck across the dark sky, the thunder roared, at the next instant bringing rain down in torrents. Kame was drenched. He slowly stood up and walked listlessly back to the dorm.
He walked in the rain for about an hour before he finally reached the dorm. He took then lift and went to his apartment. He took the keys from his soaked pockets. Before he could open the door, Koki opened it. He was coming out to throw the rubbish and he saw the devastated Kame. He was shocked and called out to the others in the room. They all came running to him. Ueda carefully asked him, “What happened Kame? Are you ok??” But, Kame smiled and said nothing. He went into the room leaving his team mates worried. They knew something must have gone wrong. Koki threw his rubbish and went to Nakamaru’s room where everyone had gathered. Although everyone knew Kame was seriously wrong, none dared to ask him what went wrong. They were afraid of hurting Kame. Taguchi decided to phone Jin.
“Jin should know what had happened.” Koki said in agreement as Junno phoned Jin.
“Moshi moshi…Jin…Kame is strange…”
“Please look after Kame…he must have been deeply hurt…”
“What happened?”
“I am getting married…my parents arranged it…”
“WHAT!!! MARRIED!!! WITH WHO!!! WHAT ABOUT KAME…” Junno was shocked.
“Not so loud…I don’t want Kame to get the wrong idea…who said I am getting married…I said my parents arranged it…and I am NOT GETTING MARRIED…It’s them who arranged it…I am opposing it…”
“Keep a look out for me…Look after Kame for tonight…he must be imaging things now…I might not be back tonight, I got to settle this matter soon…”
“Don’t worry…” With that, he hung the phone. He turned and told his friends the details as they only heard his conversation. They felt shocked too. But, they knew Kame must be feeling worst. They needed to ensure that Kame was alright. They were shocked to see Kame in the living room alone watching his favorite show and laughing out loud. They wondered if Kame was insane. They were shocked when Kame suddenly turned around and asked them to join him. There was an awkward silence before Ueda finally reacted and joking pat on his friends’ back to wake them up. They went to the couches and sat down and pretended as if nothing had happened. They accompanied him for the whole night. But, they felt tired. One by one, the kids fell asleep on the couch and floors. Kame was the only one who wasn’t asleep at 3.00am. He couldn’t fall asleep after what happened today. He was deeply disturbed. He sat on the couch and stared at the ceiling. Tears fell from his hazel eyes. He wiped it once a tear fell. He was really sad. He was uncertain about his future with Jin. He decided to get himself a cold drink. He got and was careful enough not to wake any of his soundly asleep friends. He took the bottle of iced water and gulped it all down. He decided to talk a walk outside. He tried his best to produce as little sound as he locked the door behind him. He was out. He walked about the dorm. He arrived outside Hey Say 7’s and was stopped by Chinen and his friends. They were just back after their dance practice. Yamada invited him inside for a cup of tea. Kame decided not to impose the kids as they looked dead beaten after the practice. However, they were certain of inviting their senior for a cup of tea. Kame was dragged into the room by Okamoto and Nakajima. Yamada went into the kitchen and brewed a pot of Oolong tea for his senior. The kids took turns to have showers while the others sat with their senior and sipped the tea while having a littlie chat. Kame felt really happy chatting with his juniors. They were really fun and cute. It was the only time he forgot his hurt. It was getting late and he decided to leave as he could see the fatigue in the cute kids’ eyes. He left again. Feeling lost, he went to the rooftop for a breather. He sat on the bench at the roof and let the cool wind caress his face. He felt a bit comforted. He took out his phone. He flipped it and looked at the picture of the young cool man. Jin must be feeling really troubled. Between his parents and him, he had to make a choice. It must be really tough on him. Kame knew he had to let go. He knew that their love would not have a happy ending.
KAT TUN would be affected by their rumor, they might be labeled and their music careers would be down the drain. He cannot harm his friends who had been striving so hard and encouraging each others. His parents would not be able to accept the truth either. His fans would be so disappointed in him if he continued to be with Jin. He really did not want to cause trouble to anyone. His only way out was a break up. Their love had fallen apart due the cruelty of the world. The world’s opinions on them were too harsh. The world’s refusal to accept and understand them had driven this lovely couple to their ends. Needles pricked his heart as he made the decision. He deleted all the pictures of him and Jin. He wanted to let go of their past. But, he didn’t realize it hurts so much that he felt his world collapsing. He took a notebook from his pocket and wrote on it. It was his last message as a lover to Jin…
I know you cry
I saw you weep
Dry those tears
Deep beneath my heart
I love you
I know it hurts
It will soon be gone
Let time heal our wounds
Love hurts
Let me free you
It’s the best for all
Farewell my forever love
Tears fell and some words on the letter smudge. That was a farewell note from Kame. Kame felt excruciating pain in his heart. He went back into his apartment. He saw them still sleeping soundly. He felt a sense of comfort as he looked at his peaceful friends. He went into Jin’s room. He left the note on his table. He lied on his bed and smelled his presence. It was the last time he could do this. He tidied his room lovingly for the last time. He looked at all the trophies he gotten from his childhood times. Tears welled n his eyes. He cried his heart out. He even took care not to wake his friends up. He tried his best to cry silently. Tears of sorrow, tears of hatred for the world, tears of pain stained his pretty face. His eyes grew puffy after all the crying. The night was extremely long and lonely for Kame. The first ray shone into the room. Kame knew it was all over for him and Jin. The moment he stepped out of his room marks an end to their relationship.